random etchings

the best and worst things about birthdays

The year turns around,
like a child's merry-go-round . . .
not the lights and sounds of a carousel,
full of glitter and magic,
but an every day merry-go-round,
propelled by feet with bars
to hold on tight against the motion.
It moves slow a first,
and then faster, until the world blurs and
the riders get dizzy and close their eyes
and let the forces take them.

When I was very young,
the year moved slow because everything
I saw was new—I was surround by first
steps and first new foods. I was a first
child, one who played with a toy once to
see what it did, and then abandoned it
for something less predictable,
like taking out the pans from the kitchen
cupboards and laying them on the floor
like primitive drums.

Back then, the best thing of birthdays was
cake, because we didn't often have sweets
and the worst thing was
they only happened once a year.
To a child, who has so few years, time
seems too long to go between birthdays,
and new years are rewards that lead to new
privileges—like a later bedtime.

Time has robbed cake of its pleasure. I enjoy
it, and don't begrudge the insulin, but too much
sugar makes my teeth ache with the rest of my
bones, and the best thing is that only one day
a year, I am faced with the remembrance
that I am growing continually older.

The merry-go-round moving so quickly now
that time moves in habitual monotones
blurred and racing, and I am ready to close my eyes,
lean back against the motion, and let go
to see how far I can fly.

line count: 40
Prompt: THE BEST OR WORST THINGS ABOUT BIRTHDAYS