Left-overs piled on hot rice and mixed. |
Yep. A sorting task. A prioritizing. A letting go. A going-forward. A... long listing list of issues. Capsize! I didn't quite make it to the toilet on time a couple days ago... but I cleaned it up to the point that Pan didn't notice and I feel no need to mention it to him now. We have bigger issues at present. But in the past... my job/home balance wasn't always great; and frankly, when everything went down the toilet it was sad but predictable. I was completely overwhelmed and I didn't see the landslide coming and how I wasn't going to survive it. I did survive it, but much was lost. I do have better boundaries than back then. Not perfect, but better. My home is who and what I carry with me. To LeJenD' (Jen) re "So Much to Do" : "Advice can be used for bird-cage and litter-box lining... and can be as crappy as dog-diarrhea. So... I proceed with caution. 1. You are aware that there's an issue. That's half the battle. 2. Your boss/friend/dog's-human-dad can help by insisting on work boundaries. 20 hours max? Over 2 days, 4 days, no more than 5 days (unless working 3 hours/every-day works for you like the routines of getting up and making breakfast...)? 3. There will always be too much to do. Let it go... let others... Your puppies (no matter the age) will thank you. " To Jen on the Newsfeed: "My anxiety is rising. I'd rather just stay home for the next two months. But... my butt needs to leave Thailand (for a new visa) for a day or two or maybe even ten. I don't want to. It may be a lesser known footnote of the Rule of Entropy (movement = life) versus Frictional Facts (this place feels like velcro)." Tang Ping (Chinese) or 'Lying flat' is a movement about doing nothing. Less work = less stress. After I lost my job and income I felt broken. When I managed to acquire income I felt no urge to work. I learned to live within my meagre means. It suited me well. I'm quite 'successful' now. I explore the world. I learn about people, culture, and language. I record my memories in thousands of photos. I've written thousands of pieces of poetry and prose. After numerous head injuries I try to not bang my head literally or metaphorically. To Margi (on pookfaze): "It's an issue in Thailand where 'working hard' doesn't matter. Who your daddy is = success regardless, because nothing else matters. There are other issues like colorism (whitening is a big issue here as it is in most of Asia, but in Thailand those with European or Chinese blood have naturally lighter skin and therefore... ). I grew up in this type of environment totally unaware that there was a ceiling. [Here] Thais are aware and most don't bother banging their heads." I swore-off meds ages ago. I try to regulate myself in other ways. Am I successful? I'm sure my old friends would have differing opinions if they were to get to know me again. I'm an alien in so many ways in spite of being related to my younger self. Meds help many and hopefully they will help Elle and her family in New Zealand, and me and Pan here in Thailand. To Elle in "Invalid Entry" : "It takes time for medications to even out. Glad you are happy to be on them in the meantime. Pan has severe medications and a diagnosis that would be greatly concerning if I wasn't already familiar with it in other friends. That said, he had a major breakthrough a couple days ago after a scary moment. He ADMITTED that he has severe issues, has to take his meds, that the side-affects are lada lada lada. His body needs to adjust. In his case he wants/needs to sleep... like 16 hours/day. So... he struggles and I struggle with his struggles. My own struggles? At my age I work around them; although, I'm not sleeping well and my anger-issues flare up at inopportune moments." For June 2023
Attention: Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥ and StephBee. ~670 words 45 |