There must be a light under the bushel!

The Terror of Viagra

Viagra--the revolutionary drug that can help extend or reestablish a man's sex life. Isn't it amazing what your parents will talk to you about once you're an adult???

My father and I often bump into each other in the house in the middle of the night. We're both night owls, so it's common for us to get involved in some pretty in-depth philosophical conversations in the wee hours. Last night was one of those nights, but the content had me sitting on the edge of my seat ready to bolt at a moment's notice.

For the life of me, I can't remember how the conversation turned to Viagra. What I do know is that my dad got this look on his face a couple of times, a look I've seen before and I know to be wary of it. The look precedes him saying, "I don't know if I should really be talking to you about this." The last time I got that look from my dad, he told me that my brother and I were both birthday presents to him. Hadn't I ever figured out that our March birthdays were almost 9 months to the day from his birthday? Yuck! He then told me that birthdays were a lot better in those days. Okay, at least I can pretend that the sex ended then.

Well, last night we're talking about the tiny blue pills. He got that look on his face; I panicked and quickly headed him off. "You know," I said, "all those poor little old women have to be tired. While these old men everywhere are cheering for medicine, you know those women are pissed because they thought they were finished with those horny old goats." Whew! He's sidetracked...for the moment.

A little later he started off a sentence with some chair-shifting and turning his eyes away and said, "You know, that Viagra..." I broke in, "Can you believe some men take it recreationally?" Dad shook his head in wonder and said, "I can't imagine why they would want to be perpetually hard." Not words you ever want to hear your dad say...However, I think dad finally observed my wild-eyed look at each sentence he uttered because he seemed to take pity by saying how he was too tired to worry about that stuff anymore. I have to say, I think he was lying just to make me feel better about the whole conversation. But, you know, that's when a lie is necessary as far as I'm concerned. I was able to sleep peacefully for the rest of the night.