My True Soul

Tres Amgios y poca Amigas

I just got in from playing Halo at Adam's house. I got there a little after 12 A.M. and it's now 3:45 A.M. Yeah, so... that was a long time. I'm still not sure why I stayed there that long, but alas I did, enough said.
Tonight, Eric had mentioned doing something... I figured like him and Adam. Not the others. I'd asked Jake if he wanted to go if we did anything, he said yes. He wanted out of the house. I wanted him and Eric to talk some. Done deal. I didn't realize that Sean, Melissa, and Tamara would also be going. I got there first, with the other 5 (the previous 3 plus Adam and Eric), and it was so awkward...for me. And when Jake got there...that's when I could breathe. I'm comfortable around Eric, okay around Adam. But then the others? I guess they just outweighed the comfortablity with Eric. And then Jake getting there? I guess I just knew he wouldn't give a f*** what these people thought and that gave me some breathing room.
I had to explain to my dad today that I don't like these people, thus, I don't talk to them. Pretty simple concept. That I hated how it was getting where I had to avoid people on campus. It's simple...ya don't talk to people, ya don't get to know them, ya don't let them get on your nerves, therefore ya don't have to avoid them. He just laughed at me for this.
We had to go shopping for my mom. For their anniversary. It really just seemed like he was like "oo, here's jewelry, it's something nice, it's not dirt cheap, hope she'll like them" and I just hope there was more to it than that. It so just felt like buying someone something just because you had to. I hate that feeling. I like buying people things that I think they'll like a lot or things that'll mean something to them or at least something they can use. I guess that's why it takes me so long sometimes to pick things out. I think I'm just gonna start giving people 2 gifts a year... one for christmas and birthday... but do give them to the person whenever I finally find something that fits into one of those categories. Then give them a present in the middle of July when their birthday was in March.
I was thinking tonight about the people I hang around the most. It's really simple. Are ya ready? Jake, Tyler, Shorty, and Critter. Occasionally Eric. I get along extremely well with the guys. They're similar in some ways, for example, in a shallow way... they all have green eyes... and actually naturally brown hair. Jake's punk, Tyler's a gothic dork, and Eric's kinda preppy but just a pretty normal guy. So, they look nothing alike really at all. I completely and entirely share different things with all 3 of them, but yet, it's all the same, just in different phrases. With Eric, it's so much more PG rated. But he can listen and ask me one question or say one thing and it just changes how I'm thinking and I get aggravated at him for that, but I love him for it deep down. I mean... I don't think I'll ever know a more honest/trustworthy/optimistic person in my life. For some reason, he gets me and I get him... possibly because we are similar. I want him to be in my future life, he's a keeper for sure. He's like the long lost brother I've never had. And Jake? He aggravates me sometimes, he knows he does, but it's eventually for the best. Sometimes when he tells me to just not think, I get annoyed. But honestly? It's good for someone to tell me that. I can tell him a little bit more about the passion I might feel for someone, compared to Eric, but not really all the deep emotional stuff. Now there's Tyler. Tyler and I have talked about some really odd things, some really personal things, and some emotional things. I can tell him both the emotional and passion things. He doesn't judge, it's obvious. And it was funny cause the other day I was talking about someone I like and I told him I'd shush... he told me not to cause I got all cute and happy when I talked about someone I cared about. I miss hanging around him already actually. Shorty? She and I are just like "where ever the wind blows us" as far as our conversations go. She's got her own stressful life, I know. It's all cool. There's also Critter who lives in a bubble world. Merk, I just find it amusing.
I have other people I consider to be good friends...they just don't live close.
My friend Jess is going to be getting married in May 2006 in Oregon. I would really like to go actually. So, we'll see. I'm happy for her.
I'm really tired... something about... being up for.... 19 hours, almost 20.