Who Do I Think I Am??

This one's about the angry Buffalonian.

THE PROMPT: "If you HAD to chose another place to live, where would it be and what can you see yourself doing there?"

Good evening ladies and gentlemen. Let's see...I could go with the standard Northeast answer for people who don't ski, snowboard or snow mobile, and say "somewhere warm" and call it a night. But you know me, folks. I see the line and then I cross it.

I wouldn't exactly call myself a well-travelled person, but I've been to quite a few cities in my time. Most were beautiful, and I'd consider going back. And there are some cities I'd like to visit eventually, although you've probably heard the saying "It's a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't wanna live there". Like Cleveland, Ohio for example. I've been there a few times. Consider it crossed off the list...and the next time I'm in Cleveland it better be because I'm passing through on the way to someplace better. No offense Cleveland, but if I wanted to see your city, I may as well stay home and visit downtown Buffalo. They're so identical, it's a shame. The only thing Cleveland's got on us is Major League Baseball (whatever) and the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame (been there, done that).

Now, here's what you need to know about me if you already don't. I'm not a "cold weather" person. I'm not the type when the thermometer hits 80 degrees to bitch about it being too effin' hot. It's the same people who do that that complain in the winter that it's so cold when it's 30 degrees out, and it drives me batshit. You live in Buffalo, people!! If you haven't learned by now, we're capable on occasions of seeing all four seasons in one day. Get used to it! There's another saying about the weather around here: "If you don't like the weather, wait five minutes and it'll change". Screw that...I've got a saying for ya..."If ya don't like the weather after living here for so long, effiin' move...we don't need anymore complainin' around here". And that's my word.

So where would I go? Florida. Went there twice and it was gorgeous both times. And why would I go (besides the fact that it's warm and nice a lot more often than here)? Easy. No state income tax. That's right folks. It's your money. You earned it. You keep it. Set me up on the beach, and let me do nothing but watch my glass get empty, get refilled, and get empty again (wash, rinse, and repeat). Now, I know that I might hear things like "hurricanes" and "Cubans" and "Dolphins", and let me just say this in response: 1) No matter where you go, there's going to be some kind of major weather event, and Buffalonians know how to prepare; 2) Higher Cuban population? No problem. More Cubans means more smugglers of Cuban cigars. 3) This isn't "When in Rome, do as the Romans do". I don't have to like their crappy football team. I've been cheering on a crappy football team now for over 30 years...and I'll fit right in because the Dolphins have already imploded and football season hasn't even started.

There would be one drawback if I transferred from work to Miami. I'd almost definitely have to learn some Spanish (and don't act like the six years I took of it in high school will magically work its way into my vocabulary once I cross the Florida state line...not happenin') because in the few Walgreens I stopped in while down in Miami, the help all spoke Spanish. Even the managers. We tried using our employee discount down there, and they barely spoke English. We may have incited an accidental riot had the manager on duty not known enough broken English to take care of us. True story, bro.

But anyway, here's what we love about Buffalonians. They leave for more money, better jobs, college and better weather. That's a little equation I'd like to refer to as "opportunity". But here's the truth...they always come back. And while some leave again, most never get the chance to escape twice. When they leave, the area stays in their hearts. Their stories start out with "When I was back in Buffalo..." and they proudly tell it as if they're still there. And when they do come back, it's as if they were never gone. That, my friends, would be why if I HAD to leave Buffalo, it wouldn't be on my terms. Because I'd be back. I'll bitch all day long about the cold and the snow, but I know deep down, no place is going to replace this city, people or food for me. Never.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

This song may actually be about Minnesota, but to me it's exactly how I feel about WNY. Safe travels, safe returns. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhlakIjSir0&feature=g-vrec&context=G29f26b9RVAAAA...

VITAL STATS:

Where can you get two eggs, homefries and steak for $3.99? Here: http://www.theolivetrees.com/ That was breakfast this morning...fully renovated and it's lookin' fiiiiiiiine in there.

To everyone that read last night's entry, a heartfelt thanks. Your kindness, support, encouragement, and praise have not gone unnoticed by this guy in the hoodie with a laptop. Y'all are some fantastic people, and I appreciate all that you've said. It means a lot.

I've got nothin' else to add tonight. Gonna try to check out what some of you cats had to say about the prompt before I turn around and go to work again in the morning. Peace, love, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOtpaBTqthU