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My thoughts about things. |
| A place to put my thoughts about various stuff. |
| Today is a good day. It is a good day because that is what we make of it. Some days, though, it is harder to say and do that than other days. The truth is that I am just stressed with worries and concerns. Worries over things that are happening. Our 5 month old puppy is currently being watched over at the vet because she potentially has something in her bowels. It is moving right now, which is a good sign, but if it doesn't pass, she will have to have surgery. Concerns over things that can happen/go wrong. We have a winter storm watch for the end of the week with a possibility of 8 inches of snow. In this state, that is significant. That, in and of itself, does not concern me. The fact that we have to travel during it does. Why, oh why does the weather have to do this on this one particular weekend? I know that there is a plan much bigger than I am and that I don't get to have input on... but in this moment, I am having a hard time finding my balance. One moment at a time. Breathe in, breathe out. Take my own advice. |
| I've heard the saying that you can have the spirit of Christmas (or any major happy holiday that is your favorite) all year long. Meaning that the way we treat others and ourselves can be that good all the time. Generally, it does feel like people are more giving and kind towards one another and themselves during the holidays. I'm bringing a little of that with me for 2026. No, I am not keeping the tree or the lights up.  Although, I do love the lights... and well, the cats love the tree. I am keeping some little things here and there. My dish drying matt. A little decoration that I forgot to pack away that is tucked somewhere to see now and again. And I am keeping the newsletter from Shannon  that came out in December 2025. "Short Stories Newsletter (December 17, 2025)"  I was definitely inspired to read some of the ways to keep the spark of creativity alive. One of our kids mentioned to me the other day that I had forgotten to take the Christmas gummies (as we call them) off the mirror in their bathroom. I told them, no, I hadn't forgotten. They were sad to head back to school and I wanted to leave them up just a little longer to remind them that though it has passed, Christmas will be back again next year. Probably far sooner than we can imagine. My favorite movie as a kid was Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. I used to beg mom to play it all year long, which of course drove my older siblings crazy. But, mom would usually play it from time to time, especially if I was sick and stuck on the couch. I guess I had that feeling of wanting the Christmas spirit all year round long before I even understood what it meant. So, for 2026, I'm bringing it back in my own ways.  I probably won't drive my family nuts by watching Rudolph periodically throughout the year... probably.  |
| We are four days into 2026. How could that possibly be? I remember thinking that 2027 is way far away into the future and now it is on the horizon. I always feel rushed these days. No matter what it is I am doing, I feel that I am not doing it fast enough. I started realizing this about a year ago. When it occurred to me, I had the immediate thought of - why? Why am I rushing and silently berating myself because I'm not getting things done faster? There are a few reasons. None of them are appropriate and they certainly aren't beneficial to my health. Outside influence. Others that drive themselves and it is simply expected that everyone else should, too. Never enough time. Many days go by in a blink, it seems. Poor time management. Getting caught up in the feelings and losing focus, priorities get skewed. Fatigue. I cannot honestly recall a time when I didn't feel tired. Though I am realizing the physical aspect is a manifestation of emotional and mental stress, mostly. Negative self-outlook. If you haven't finished it by now, when will you ever? Hurry, hurry, hurry! Sadness. Times have passed that will never be again. Times are coming that the same will happen. All of this is to say that I do now realize I need to slow down to hurry up, so to speak. I need to set boundaries, get more organized, look deeper, process things (not hide from them), and begin to evaluate myself and my role in the world. As I do those things and slow down to do them, my hope is that I will unlock new (and old) feelings, skills and abilities that will help carry me through my present and future challenges in a healthier and more satisfying way. |
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