Dear Amy

Dear Chelsea,
It can be very frustrating when people get on your nerves. Even more so when they're relatives . . . you can't just walk away because they'll always be there.

You didn't give me a lot of details about your situation, but here's one simple thing you can always use when you're trying to confront someone about something. The key is to focus on how you're feeling, and frame what you're saying in a way that's not accusatory.

For example . . .
Scenario: younger sister gets into her older sister's makeup

Older sister could react in a couple of ways . . . and might get a very different response:
1 - I told you not to get into my stuff! Now it's ruined and it's all your fault and I'm telling mom!

2 - Cindy, I get very frustrated when you get into my things, because I used my own money to buy them. It makes me feel like you don't care about my feelings when you do that.

Does that make sense? There's a simple formula that you can use:

I . . .
When you . . .
Because . . .

If you want to give me more details about what's going on, I might be able to offer some other suggestions. Good luck!


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