I wake up in a groggy state. Kind of felt a little itch on my ass, but it went away when I rolled over. I think, "I'm getting to old too drink that much. I feel like shit." My stomach is all torn up. I am so hungover, it's not even funny. Way too much to eat and drink last night.
My stomach gurgles loud enough for me to hear it now. I push out a huge, long, slightly wet fart. Oh, yeah - that was a good one. Nothing quite like ripping ass. Oh shit, that smells horrible. I feel like I could fart all day. At least that might help my tummy a bit.
Damn, I think I'm laying on something. Maybe I passed out last night with my cell phone in bed with me. Hope I wasn't drinking and dialing. That never turns out well.
The noxious smell when I roll over is rank. What the hell did I lay on?
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