"Look, I'm just saying," Melanie Mau said around a mouthful of pizza. "You do eat more than me. Not like it matters, though."
"What do you mean?" Ellen Morris asked, taking another enormous bite of her triple cheeseburger and washing it down with a mouthful of soda. "I've only had three today. You've had practically a whole pizza."
"At least mine has vegetables on it," Melanie retorted.
"You're both a couple of pigs," the third girl snorted, darting her eyes from the tall Hawaiian beauty to the petite blonde who looked like she'd just stepped out of the Russian ballet. She threw her own auburn curls over her shoulder. "We all need to pace ourselves. Stupid Mandy only found us one lousy mule for the summer, and she's almost used up."
"'Used up'?" Melanie said with a raised eyebrow. "It's not like they get smaller, Jenna."
"Maybe not, but they do get smarter. And when one of them puts on twenty pounds in a week they get smarter pretty damn fast!" Jenna's lip curled. "That Lindsey bitch knows something is up. How could she not, the way you two have been stuffing yourselves? She's on the verge of leaving the house."
"Smmph?" Melanie crammed the rest of her burger into her mouth, a dribble of cheese and mayonnaise running down her cheeks.
"So, if Lindsey leaves, we'll have no mules at all!" Jenna snapped.
"What? Wait, what about that exchange student? Koko or whatever?"
"Keiko's not coming back from Nagoya," Jenna said icily. "It seems her parents were a little concerned about their darling little girl packing on eighty pounds in America."
"I thought she'd been awfully quiet recently. Well, what about Marie?"
"Marie quit over a year ago, you airhead! Now, Lindsey's getting ready to haul her fat ass out after her. And if that happens..."
Melanie and Ellen looked at each other and paled.
"Exactly. How long do you think the cheer squad will want you, Mel, without a mule to soak up those extra calories? And as for you! You think the drama department has room for a fat Galinda? I don't remember you being very 'pop-yoo-oo-lar' your first semester here."
"Oh my god! Are you serious?" Ellen gasped. "You're serious. You're really serious. We -- we have to find a replacement!"
Jenna held up her hands. "Calm down, ladies. And put your happy faces on." She nodded cheerfully to the two first-year girls approaching. "I think a solution just may be about to present itself..."
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