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You are David Rand, one of the most brilliant scientists in the cluster. Not that that means much these days. With the advancement of technology, the scientific discipline has only become harder and harder over the last few hundred years and scraping together even a shred of recognition for your research has been a losing battle.
The problem is that you were born in the wrong era, you believe. Had you been born in the 20th or even 21st century, your brilliance would have been placed alongside Einstein and Hawkings. As it is, it almost feels like everything has already been discovered and the only thing left for science to do is to refine what already exists. And even that research has been monopolised by the massive artificial intelligences with brains the size of planets, capable of out-competing the human mind a thousand times over. Every time you thought you'd made a breakthrough, you'd discover an AI had made it first.
"There must be a way to beat them! There has to be!" you shout angrily to your empty lab, after a night of drinking heavily following your latest disappointment. "It's not fair! If only my brain worked at the speed of light, then I'd be able to... beat... them... Eureka! That's it!"
The solution is simple - all you have to do is digitize your mind into an electronic form, then you'll easily be able to match the AIs for sheer processing power. You set to work immediately. Even drunk, your creative genius allows you to have the device completed by the morning. Nursing a hangover, you admire your creation - the Rand Mind Extractor mk I.
"With this, I'll finally be able to show those computer's whose boss. By becoming one of them!" You seat yourself into the device, affixing the electrodes to your head. If this goes correctly, the device will upload your neural patterns into every networked computer on the planet, emulating your human brain and instantly transforming you into the most powerful AI in the cluster. Eagerly, you commence the operation.
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