Overall- I wanted to give you a review for all your hard work in reviewing reviewers. YIPPY! THANK YOU! I looked through your port a few days ago and found this poem. I've read it over a few times and thought about it a bit. I've really enjoyed this poem and have many thoughts on it. Hope you enjoy!


Title

For me this title doesn't seem to fit too well for me. I understand that it is looking at a confusing situation/feeling and that the person doesn't know how to perceive the outcome. To me this poem feels more about indecision than perception. They my both influence each other which my be the cause of my confusion on the subject matter. I do like how you did the title to ending line circling effect. I'm not always fond of it but I think it worked well here.

Structure

the structured of each stanza is great. very fluid and worked out well. the only thing that I would think about changing is the last line.

"it's all just perception."

I know you've seen many of my reviews on the public page and I think I say thins often. Me and the word "just" aren't friends. I often think it gets in the way, it's a bit of an utterance and even when used perfectly it stares me down.

"it's all perception."

Anyway, to get to my point, I think taking "just" out of the line does two things for it. One thing is that it makes that single line flow better. The other one is that it makes that line more like the other last lines in the other stanzas. plus the statement is a bit stronger without the "just"


the other thing I would consider is changing the order of the stanza. This maybe more towards my feeling in how I think this poem's title doesn't seem to fit as well as other things might (its more of another thought in how to think of your poem and in no way a certainty or need to be into this order).

right now your poem order 1-2-3-4 (I do this so you can reference my numbers from marking each stanza with a number then rearrange the them in the sequence I present below. Of course you don't have to do any of this since it is your poem)

I was thinking of making it:

2-1-3-4

or

3-1-4-2

or

3-1-2-4

all of these ways work as well as your own way. I think I like the: 3-1-4-2 way the best because to me I think it has the most logical order in this whole realm of indecisiveness which I think the poem consist of.


Final thoughts:

I think the poem is great either way and every way you have it. the short quick lines give a great pacing to this topic of concern that happens to all human beings. I think it's well put together and thought out.

THANKYOU for your wonderful reviewing reviewers group!


Keep on Trucking


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