Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I really identified with the wanderer's character. It seems like he's trying desperately to cling to something or someone that he can care about. I know I have felt a need to belong a time or to and don't know how sometimes.

Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I think it's important to place ourselves in the perspective of the disillusioned sometimes. It's a great empathy builder.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

The way I interpreted this piece was two-fold. I felt a clear sense of longing with lines like wanderer mad with love, what do you search for? And the frustration of not being allowed to be with someone you desperately want to be with.

Glows:

I loved some of the lines: hiding the hurt in your smile that you belong to all the world and yet no one is yours to hold. You Did great job of creating a mood of longing and frustration of unrequited love.

Grows:

There were more than a couple of typos: feets, fiery, and a few statements that should be questions. Also, I would consider changing the dreams to my dreams. Minor mistakes, but they took away from some of the artistry of the work.



Miscellaneous Comments:


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .