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 Review #4319715 |
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| (5.0)| Hi ~A.J. Lyle~ My name is Ken and I'm pleased to read and comment on your work "Invalid Item" on behalf of "Earth Day Challengers" . First Impression/Thoughts: I see why this won  Well thought out, presents the issues, and most importantly, offers solutions. Too many say "What can I do - I'm only one person." You've given them an answer. Creativity/Impact:I enjoyed this essay and I thought the creativity you showed in your approach to saving the environment was excellent and - dare I say - long overdue.  Message/Theme: Uhhh, Earth Day?  Seriously, you've tackled the issue of environmental destruction caused by our own hands and taken the next step ... "if we quit talking and start doing." Technique/Technical Notes: I offer you the following as food for thought and not as criticism. I encourage you to consider what I offer but always follow your instinct and heart. You are the writer. Title: An excellent synopsis of your essay. The "teaser" line (or description  ) offers an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. Again, creative and informative. Grammar/Wording: Your language is well thought out, eliciting and reinforcing your message. I saw nothing in error. A clean write shows you care about your craft as much as the subject of your writing. Form/Flow: Written as an essay, I thought you laid out your argument logically and in a manner that the average reader could understand. The "everyday things" that you advocate are simple and, taken by many, can have a huge impact on the world.  Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: An enjoyable and hopeful read even if the subject is our own indifference to what we're doing to the world. Your recognition that small changes can have big impacts has been translated into a every day action plan for those who care. Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more. Keep writing! Wishing you all the best for Earth Day 2017, Ken
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