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Review #4663157
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A Plant Walk Open in new Window. [E]
Short story about a Plant Walk
by Apondia Author Icon
Review of A Plant Walk  Open in new Window.
Review by Starling Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
A Plant Walk
*Notes: There is a lot of good information here. I noticed your errors with punctuation. I use a program called Grammarly. It is free and it will check your written work for you. I have included a line-by-line review below.
Red - changes needed
Blue - suggested changes and comments

***Julie and Jerry had carefully planned the Plant Walk This morning each had packed a back pack (one word) for the walk.
***Julie’s held a small first- aide (remove space after -) kit, which held band aides, (hyphenated words) antibiotic ointment, a sprain wrap, and bee sting medication. She threw in several bottles of water. A (comma not a period, lower case on -a) clean t-shirt, and a small package of rubber gloves. As, an after thought (one word) she also threw in a clean pair of socks, some energy bars (comma) and a pair of clogs. Then she added a Plant guide book, a small tablet (comma) and a water resistant (hyphenated) pen. When the red back pack (one word) was closed she tied a cheap pair of plastic shoe covers to one of the rings that hung from the edge of the pack.
***“Be prepared, is what I think.” (comma not a period, lower case on -s) She replied.
***Jerry sobered. He was wearing Jeans, (lower case) a dark blue t-shirt (comma) and red hiking shoes. “O.K., In that frame of mind!” He began by stuffing a wrapped peanut butter sandwich, energy bars (comma) and bottles of water in his pack. He grabbed the solar flashlight he had recently purchased, adding it to the contents (period) of the pack.. Stuffing a light wind breaker (one word) on the top of everything he closed the pack. “Is your phone charged? Don’t forget your phone. And, bug spray.”
***Julie was wearing jeans with a narrow utility belt a green long-sleeved t-shirt, and ankle high (hyphenated) brown leather hiking shoes. Her phone, a small flashlight, a pair of lineman's pliers, and a small can of bug spray hung from leather pouches on the belt. “Yes. Plus, there is a small solar charger in my pack that can charge several phones, before the energy runs out of it.”
***Jerry chuckled. He walked to the drawer on the desk, took out a small pack of matches, then unzipping the pack he added them to the items and zipped the pack closed.” (put a space in front of quote marks and remove the space after the quote marks) Do you think we should take a tent?” he teased.
***There was a small parking lot where the trail started and ended. Now, it was crowded with four other cars. Julie was an herbalist. She often planned and took people on Plant Walks to learn more about the wild growing (hyphenated) herbs in her community area.
***People, four females and two males, (no comma) were sitting and standing by a picnic table situated in a clearing near the parking lot. “Oh good, it looks like everyone is here.”
***Jerry removed both back packs. (one word) while Julie locked the car and stowed her keys in her pack, which Jerry handed to her.
***“ (remove space) Jerry, this is Amy, Mary, Shirley, Susan, Sam (comma) and Buddy. I work with Amy and Mary. I met Sam and Susan at the Plant Conference, and Shirley and Buddy just called one day about the Plant Walk.”
***The group crowded around and were shaking hands with each other. Shirley spoke up. (opening quote marks) I don’t know about Buddy, but I saw your card at the conference Plant Walk table and just called the number on it.”
***... I think he went to the plant conference too. . (only one period) Julie explained about the merits of a Plant Walk (period) Now, I think I might be here to learn something.?”
***Julie began her guide talk. “O. K. Our walk is about four miles long. It begins over there.(quote marks) She (lower case on -s) pointed to a trail head (one word) with a sign on it pointing in the direction of the forest. (quote marks) And it ends on the opposite side of the parking lot. I’ve been on this trail a lot of different times and picked it for today, (no comma) because it is close to where we all live. It seems to have a lot of growing herbs along the edge. Remember, don’t pick anything until we all get a chance to photograph and list the plants. I’ll let you know if it is safe to take samples. (closing quote marks are not needed because Julie continues to talk in the next paragraph)
***(Opening quote marks) The trail is a circular path. We will be crossing small bridges, that transport hikers over smiling creek. (caps for proper name) Smiling creek (caps on Creek) is a very small tributary, about 5 (numbers ten or less are normally spelled out in writing) feet wide and calf deep, (hyphenated) (comma) that drains into a river several miles away. We are fortunate to have really nice weather today for the walk. We will see dense tree growth interspersed with meadows along the trail. (closing quote marks)
***The group walked over to the sign, (period not a comma) Amy took the lead. She was the shortest member of the group. …
***Amy was standing on the paved trail pointing at a clump of yellow blossoms. The others had gathered off the trail around the plant. A sudden roar from the forest, which they were going to soon enter, caused the group to look up.
***Jerry was standing close to Amy, (no comma) when Julie shouted (period, caps on -he) he reached out and grabbed her arm, jerking her toward him off the trail. A motor bike (one word) roared past at the same time. Within split seconds it exited the parking lot onto the road leading out of the park.
***Amy was rubbing her arm. “Thanks (comma) Jerry.”
***“What on earth was that, (question mark not a comma) Motor vehicles are not allowed on this trail. It’s a walking trail only.” (comma not a period, lower case on -s) Stated Julie.
***Buddy was squatted down next to the yellow plant. Now he exclaimed, “ (remove space) I know this, it’s just a weed.”
***His exclamation took the groups (apostrophe -s) attention away from the near accident. They all turned their attention to the plant.
***“Thanks to Jerry,” (period not a comma)
***“Hope I didn’t injure your arm with that quick jerk?’ (double quotes not single)
***(Opening quotes) This plant is a rather common one. It is classified as a weed. I’m sure many or all of you recognize a Dandelion. It is also an herb. Every part of it is eatable and useful as a medicinal plant. The scientific name is Taraxacm (spelling) officianale. The shape of the leaves resemble (add an -s) a lion’s tooth. The French call it “dents de lion.” (apostrophes need to mark this since it falls within speech) It has lots of different names in other countries, Blow ball, because of the seeds that develop from the blossom into a snowy soft ball. (one word) Each seed is attached to a small piece of fluff that allows the wind to carry the seeds and spread them as they disperse. It’s also called canker wort and wild endive... Take some close up (hyphenated) pictures of it so you can identify the leaves and stem. (closing quote marks needed)
***(opening quote marks) It’s rich in vitamins, A, E, C and iron, zinc, and calcium. Speaking of calcium, it puts it’s (no apostrophe) roots down deep into the ground and draws up calcium into the top soil. (one word) One of the reasons you see some places covered with Dandelion is because the soil needs the calcium nutrient this plant is providing. (closing quote marks are not needed because Julie continues to talk in the next paragraph)
***(opening quote marks) Medicinally the plant is a natural diuretic. And, the blossom is used as a pale yellow dye. It is also used as a food. O.K. Let’s move on down the trail. (closing quote marks)
***As they entered the forest Buddy would stop and run his hand up a tree here and there. Finally (comma) he drifted in beside Julie and asked questions about the trees they were passing.
***“Buddy this is a deciduous forest. I’m not as knowledgeable about trees. You should take some pictures. I’ll tell you some web sites, (one word) before you leave, where you can look up different trees to identify them. There are some conifers here.” Buddy was typing quickly, on his phone, writing down words to look up later.
***. (remove period) They were rounding a small knoll where the trail was bending to the right. The forest had receded leaving a rise in the land that was well exposed to sunlight. Mary pointed out a plant (period, caps on -H) her bright orange shirt was highlighted by the sunshine. (caps on -S) she was taking pictures of, a plant, (period, not a comma, caps on -W) “what is this?”
***Julie was turning pages in her guidebook. “ (remove space) I think it’s comfrey, Yes, see how the purple flowers are hanging down like small clumps of bells? The scientific name is Symphytum officianale.(caps on -o) You can buy this plant by the pound from tea houses and places like Amazon. However, its’ (no apostrophe) use is controversial. It contains chemicals, (no comma) and alkaloids that are considered dangerous to the liver if the plant is ingested. Because of some kinds of tests, the USA has labeled it illegal to use in medicines. It has been used for many years by individuals for coughs and sore throats. It has also been used as a healing agent for skin injuries. One of the dangers is that It (lower case) can be absorbed through the skin. A YouTube put out by HerbTV features a lecture by herbalist Rosemary Gladstar, about the plant, its uses, and the controversy surrounding the herb. You can see why it is growing here. Lots of sunshine and the soil is well drained. (hyphenated) It is also called a slippery root. And, it is easy to grow from seed. Take some pictures because I’m a little surprised to find it in this particular spot.
***(Opening quotemarks) Let’s move on I think we are near the bridge over smiling creek. The path straightened out and they saw the bridge ahead. (closing quote marks are not needed because Julie continues to talk in the next paragraph)
***... The stem grows up and becomes long and heavy, then loops down touching the ground to grow roots. This helps the plant to spread across the ground. Pollinator (add -s) enjoy the white or purple flowers. Don’t feed it to your animals, because it is toxic to pets. (closing quote marks)
***The group walked the circular path ending back at the parking lot. They had taken lots of pictures of plants. Lemon balm, lavender, and rosemary were some of the other plants found. Julie told Buddy where to find The American Botanical Council and the AHPA.org (America Herbal Products Association) (the abbreviation should be in parentheses and the written definition out of the parentheses) and cautioned him about not using plants as medicine unless he was sure of the results or risks.
***Jerry rejoined the group as they were moving toward their automobiles. “The park security caught the guy on the motor bike," (one word) he reported.
***" (remove the space) I clued them in to (one word) what happened here to us. He is going to receive a large fine and have to do some community service. He said he was just checking on the Comfrey plants he planted out on the trail somewhere.”
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Ultimate Trinket Adventure [Mainland] Open in new Window. (E)
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#2267246 by GERVIC Author IconMail Icon

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