Hello Steven Gepp!

Thanks again for the beta reader opportunity on this urban dragon novel of yours. I just finished reading these two chapters (twelve and thirteen), so I'm here to do your review. I hope you enjoy it and find it encouraging and uplifting.


INITIAL IMPRESSION / OVERVIEW:
I enjoyed these chapters and am looking forward to the next installment. Well done!

You kept me riveted and I read straight through to the end. Well done!



MORE DETAILED FEEDBACK:

I was glad that Scott realized what he'd done to his friends wasn't okay. And his ambivalence seemed true to life. I imagine it would be very hard to know what to do in that situation.

I am looking forward to learning what Mark said on that hidden video Scott pocketed.


The fortune telling dragon man seems like a dishonest proverbial used car salesman with his fairy tale that if Scott just stays out of the way everything will be great on earth.

It's totally understandable that Scott would be so confused.


I didn't notice any spelling mistakes in your two chapters. Well done!

Ah that kiss at the end. Super awkward. I am seeing a pattern with him not knowing what to say so just saying something lol. I can see that. Plenty of guys are that way. Or another pattern I've noticed is that they just nod and don't say anything, when they don't know what to say. (In life, not your novel here.)


Your story chapters were interesting to me, and made me want to read your next one. Well done!



IDEAS TO MAKE YOUR PIECE STRONGER:
I don't really have any suggested changes. I would like to be more helpful, but you just did a great job. I couldn't improve on it. Well done!


CONCLUSION:
You have a great writing style and I easily got drawn into the story. Well done!

Thank you for sharing your time and writing with the Writing.Com community!

May love, joy and peace be yours in abundance!
PWheeler








Positive Hearts
A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group" 




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .