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Review #4741043
Viewing a review of:
 
Fear of Flying Open in new Window. [ASR]
I wasn’t always scared of flying.
by sindbad Author Icon
Review of Fear of Flying  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (3.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
The Free Folk image for G.o.T.


Hello sindbad

I'm sending this review in connection with "Game of ThronesOpen in new Window..


*Penw* Positives

The ending sentiment of your piece was lovely. Fear really can give us a unique appreciation for the lives we live, and I think you did a good job of conveying that with just a few short words at the end of the work.


*Penw* Suggestions

I wish that sentiment at the end would have been played out, foreshadowed, etc. a little earlier in the piece, or that the piece would have been longer to accommodate more time and focus on that element of it. As it is, it feels like the work is more focused on playing up the fear than it is focusing on what that feeling of fear does or results in. I think that's the strongest argument in the piece, and it's less important than the specifics of why the fear is there in the first place.

That said, there are definitely some parts of the material that could use some additional explanation as well. How do you assess "levels of experience, confidence, and normalcy" in the pilot with just a glance? What does "mentally flying the aircraft" mean? How can you identify fellow passengers who might be terrorists, mischief makers, or as terrified of flying as you? It doesn't necessarily have to be rational since it's the perspective of one person (the narrator), but I think it would help the reader understand how the narrator identifies these qualities.


*Penw* Overall

Overall, this was a well-written item that did a great job detailing the reasons someone might be afraid of flying, but could use a little more work fully drawing out it's central premise that the fear being described can actually be a good thing.


Respectfully,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
"Rating & Reviewing PhilosophyOpen in new Window.

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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