\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4743352
Review #4743352
Viewing a review of:
 Carlie's Wish Open in new Window. [E]
Carlie is a cow that wishes she could fly.
by Chrys O'Shea Author Icon
Review of Carlie's Wish  Open in new Window.
Review by Choconut Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hi Chrys O'Shea Author Icon,

*Dragon* This review was written on behalf of House Targaryen as part of "Game of ThronesOpen in new Window.! *Dragon*


Disclaimer


The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.


What I liked:

*Bulletr* The central part of this story is a message that everyone is important and everyone has their part to play in any family or organisation. It is told through the eyes of Carlie, a cow who is somewhat restless in her position on the farmyard. She longs, more than anything, to have wings and to be able to fly. She is sure that is how she could be truly happy. She figures that she doesn't have an important part to play on the farm. She doesn't help settle the hens at night, she doesn't give allergy free milk like the goat does. She doesn't think she offers anything worthwhile. I felt so sorry for Carlie. She seems like a sweetheart. Once she gets her wings, magically one morning, she realises that she doesn't want to be constantly airbound. She wants to spend time with her friends and providing her special, extra rich milk for a sick child.

*BulletR* I love how this story would help to make children with less confidence feel good about themselves. It also teaches the lesson of being happy with who you are, and playing to your strengths. Another important message that I wish someone had told me when I was younger.


Suggestions: Just a minor point. I felt the end thought, where Carlie thinks how much more important she could be, was not necessary. It's almost like she still doesn't feel she is enough as she is, which goes against the rest of the story. I also have a few grammar suggestions. I will put them in a dropnote, so you can read them at leisure (or not).
Grammar Suggestions


Parting comments: I really enjoyed this story. It is a fantastic way of building confidence in children who are shy or unconfident. Thanks for sharing.


Choconut

My House Targaryen Sig. for Game of Thrones, 2024.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4743352