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 Review #4743812 |
 | Dear Diary  [E] Writer's Cramp Entry Deadline - 4/11/24 - 685 words  |
| Hello Wordsmith John! This review is given on behalf of "Game of Thrones" . This was a good spin on the prompt. I like that you chose letters home. Good idea! These letters were from a young lady on the Titanic with her nanny. She writes short letters home to her parents. She tells of the orchestra, bad food, getting a room to herself, and on the last day, going on deck to see the icebergs the help is talking about. We don't read a letter penned after that.Character - The young woman (we're not told how old she is) I assume she's an older teenager by her behavior. You can tell by her short letters home that she is quite spoiled and used to having her way. But she is an obedient daughter and writes two short letters home daily. Except for the day she has seasickness. She says it's food poisoning, but considering she was on the Titanic, I chalk it up to sea sickness. Setting - It would have been nice to get a little more detail and description of her surroundings on the ship. It seems she would have written to her parents about the Grand Staircase at least. But she doesn't talk about the grandeur of the ship at all. I think this would help add greatly to the 'feel' of the relationship between the daughter and parents. What I Liked Best - I like how you handled the end. The last thing she was going to do was go up on deck to look for the icebergs. She wanted to see one up close. Be careful what you wish for. Below are a few suggestions. Please use or discard them as you see fit.  exactly at noon,No Comma needed  it's maiden voyage.its maiden voyage  worst has past.worst has passed. Thank you so much for sharing your writing with us. I enjoyed it.  Intuey"When you play the Game of Thrones you win, or you die." Cersei Lannister   The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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