The Jewel Thief [13+] Writer's Cramp, January 16 2024 (Winner) & Newbie Poetry Contest, February 2024 (Winner) |
Hi Dave Ryan , I have the pleasure of reviewing your item as part of the "Game of Thrones" anniversary reviews challenge. Prose This is a very fun poem in an English bawdy humour syle. You've created a fantastic rhyming pattern, with that repeating final line adding to the musical lilt: an anticipated cymbal clash at thecend of each verse. The line that you put in between each set of rhymed verses doesn't seem to have a rule, being of different lengths. Those lines read sort of like an authors commentary, like a whispered aside, privileged information. These additions definitely enrich the poem overall. Favourite libe And as I scratched my left big toe, right testicle and chin Cause that was just darned funny and unexpected: and wot, no washing of hands?! My Recommendations Now that the competition is over (and you aced it) I'd love you to drop that prompt out of bright blue (perhaps italics instead), because it is quite distracting when we now read it to just enjoy. Overall This is a really fun read, and I like that there is dry humour to offset the ribald. Thank you for sharing your work! The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Cheerleader compliments of Team Lannister
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