\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4744750
Review #4744750
Viewing a review of:
 The First Day Of Spring Open in new Window. [E]
Reflections during a ramble.
by SandraLynn Author Icon
Review by GERVIC Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
House Targaryen image for G.o.T.
In House Targaryen,
there'll be

*Fire* FIRE *Fire* & *DropR* BLOOD *DropR*

IN AFFILIATION WITH:
"The WDC Angel ArmyOpen in new Window.


Disclaimer:

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.



Greetings SandraLynn Author IconMail Icon!

I am currently reviewing as part of the tasks set by the "Game of ThronesOpen in new Window.. I especially visited your port to dig your most precious gems then this piece appeared. In this review, I mainly focus on the positives of your piece and I may point some Areas for Improvement if found any. Without much a do, here are the things I noticed after delving deeper into the contents:


"The First Day of Spring" is a captivating poem that chronicles the elation and ultimate disappointment of a seemingly perfect spring day. The title establishes an initial sense of optimism, but the opening line introduces a note of reflection with the phrase "On this one-year anniversary." This subtle hint of a past injury is further explored in the second line, where the meticulous details of a healed fibula ("weight-bearing," "solid, set") emphasize the speaker's regained mobility. The language is powerful, highlighting the journey of recovery and the joy of movement.

The poem then takes a delightful turn. The playful sound effects like "plink, plonk" bring the melting icicles to life, further reinforced by the onomatopoeia of "rat-a-tat." These playful sounds paint a vivid picture of a day thawing from winter's grip. The image of a "plump puddle, sprawled, glistening in the sun" adds to the sensory richness, highlighting the warmth and wetness of the day. The speaker's joyful exploration is evident in the rhythmic "splash, splop" sounds as they walk through the puddle, their movements unburdened by the past injury.

The poem's strength lies in its unexpected shift in tone. Just as the speaker raises their face for a warm caress, anticipating spring's arrival, the weather takes a dramatic turn. The personification of "Mercurius March" (the Roman god Mercury is also associated with swiftness and change) underscores the swiftness of this shift. The dark clouds and "furious, stinging snowflakes" create a stark contrast to the previous scene of sunshine and melting ice. The final line, "Why?" is a powerful ending, leaving the reader with a sense of disappointment that mirrors the speaker's own. It also lingers as a question about the capricious nature of spring, a season that can promise warmth and then deliver a harsh wintery reminder. Thank you for sharing this. Write on!

Best regards,
Gervic

GoT House Targaryen :: Gervic


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/14/2024 @ 9:51am EDT
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4744750