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Review #4746416
Viewing a review of:
 What Did He Say? Open in new Window. [E]
Aiden tries to tell his Nanna what he doesn't like.
by SandraLynn Author Icon
Review of What Did He Say?  Open in new Window.
Review by Lyn's a Wit... Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi Sandra

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: What Did He Say?

First Impression: Thanks for putting it in the family category, it was the first one listed when I went under family looking. You did much better than I did on that prompt.
I agree with Aiden, KFC used to be good. At least, it was when I was a kid. Yeah, back in the dark ages.

What needs your attention: Sorry, Sandra but my same pet peeve applies, the font size is so small. 20/20 is another dark age thing. I didn't notice punctuation or grammar issues.

What part I liked best: I could see Aiden crushing the egg with his hand and wiping it on his teeshirt so vividly. My grandson used to do that. Everything was wiped on his clothes. It's gotta be a boy thing.
Nothing is safe for licking these days. There's always germs lurking.

Overall impression: Your story was a flash fiction entry with required words of bottle, chicken, and shoe. The author created a story that felt natural and had good pacing. The little boy felt adorable to this reader. Do you have grandchildren? It feels like you do.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Thank you for rising to the occasion so Team Florent successfuly did the prompt together.
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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/19/2024 @ 5:39pm EDT
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