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 Review #4746494 |
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| (4.5)| This is an unofficial Game of Thrones raid from brought to you by "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" :(Cause I quit GOT on 11 April 2024, but still wanna play the game unofficially.)     HAPPY WDC ANNIVERSARY from "Anniversary Reviews" !!! Awwww! What a nice ending! I have to admit to you though that I expected the old lady to die because when she was receiving her acupuncture treatment, it hurt and there I was thinking—Wait a second. Acupuncture treatment is not supposed to hurt. This is a quack doctor and she's gonna die! So, I read the whole story with bated breathe, actually waiting for the signs of her dying to come. Good job tricking me there!  To be honest, I only had acupuncture treatment for sprained ankle so I wouldn't know for sure if it hurts. I just assumed so. Also, I know I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's start from the very beginning. I've to say that it's really nice to read an Asian story. I'm Chinese so I can understand some of the insertion of Mandarin names and conversations. I like that you weaved an explanation to tell your Western readers what they had meant. I imagine this story to be accompanied by a series of illustrations too. Yeah, I can totally see it. Oh yes, to begin—good hook starting your story with the sick Mrs. Lao. Strong intro and I love how you weave both plot and characterisation with each other. Not only did you build a strong, but relatable plot, but also you've also made me form opinions about your character. I vouch for Mrs. Lao, but I was very suspicious of Mr. Chang. Your setting is very well done and you've painted it vividly enough for it to be a character of its own. You've described the surroundings well and included the cultural elements in the storytelling itself. Again, because I'm Chinese, I understood where you were coming from immediately and I could relate to your story. Several themes/ messages of morality/ subtext played very strongly in your story: respecting your elderlies, always be grateful to people who have helped you in your life, always fulfil your promises. In the very tricky element of Show vs. Tell, I think you've chosen your technique rather well. Your story is meant for everyone—so that the young and old could cherish them for a long, long time. Therefore, you focused on presenting your story in simple sentences and what I truly felt about your story is this—a simple story with a profound meaning in it. This is the gist of a lot of wisdom stories. I find them the most difficult to write and therefore have the greatest respect of you for being able to come up with such gem. What I love most is how you ended the story. At the end of the day, the greatest lesson to learn is that Mrs. Lao got better because she is finally not lonely and is with her friends again. The thing is, this is a very common story around me. You hear people telling stories about how older people like being among their friends and when they get older then have to stay away from their familiar surroundings, they start aging rapidly, fall sick and eventually die. I love how the grandfather did not answer his grandson directly, but replied in the wisest way possible.  Something to look out for: But Because her nice home was somewhat isolated, and she rarely left it, so that even though the village was not very big, I love your story so, so, so much. All the best in creating your series and getting them published. I'm quite sure they will do well. | 11:59 (+8 GMT  , 20 April 2024, Saturday |CC:3204 The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!  Elycia Lee ☮   My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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You last responded to this review 04/24/2024 @ 11:54am EDT