This week: Don't Die There! Edited by: W.D.Wilcox More Newsletters By This Editor
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-Hungarian painter, poet, and sculptor Mihaly Gulbis was killed when his one and a half-ton sculpture “Woman with Four Breasts” fell on him.
-The body of retired German electrician Manfred Lubitz was found in his apartment in Malaga wearing a handmade gadget he called the ‘orgasmatron’. It featured a vibrating mat, massage pads, and electrodes attached to his manhood. Police believe he died as a result of a power surge.
-The body of 60-year-old Robert Dean Eaton was found naked and chained to an oak tree in an area outside Happy Valley, California. Police said: “He had a history of mental health problems. He was always doing this sort of thing.”
-The naked body of Abelard Hattensperger was found on the deck of his boat on Lake Biggesee, Germany in 1983. An autopsy showed he had been struck by lightning, but could not explain why his groin was covered in grease.
-Paul G. Thomas, the 47-year-old co-owner of the Thomas & Sons Textile company, met a ridiculously undignified death in August 1987 when he was wound into a giant spool of wool. He got caught up in a spooling machine and when his body was discovered, he had been suffocated behind hundreds of meters of yarn.
-In 1986, a woman was found in Dayton, Ohio, naked and trapped under the corpse of her lover. The couple had been making love in her car, which was parked on the upper story of a garage. During sex, he died, collapsing on her and pinning her to the back seat of the car. By the time she was discovered under his decomposing body, she was suffering so badly from the effects of dehydration and hypothermia that she too died within hours of her rescue.
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Don't Die There!
Jack wasn't really sure how long he'd been dead. For days, maybe? When he found himself in the bathroom, he tried desperately to get back into his body.
"Come on, Jackie-boy. You don't wanna die here. Get up, buddy! Get up!"
Over and over again, he attempted to merge back with his body, but he just wouldn't stick -- he kept slipping out, passing right through. He wondered now whether anyone would find him. He had no friends, no loved ones to check on him. His body lay crumpled on the bathroom floor in front of the toilet, pants around his ankles. He remembers sitting there, bending over, straining to go poop. But that was all he remembered.
Those damn pain pills he'd been taking made it harder and harder to have a bowel movement. Jack didn't see anything in the toilet, so he guessed he was unsuccessful once again. He hoped no one would find him like this. It was kind of embarrassing.
Now what was he going to do? He had the overwhelming feeling he was supposed to stay close by. So he did.
This went on for days -- months even. Jack's body was starting to look a little . . . off.
Finally, a couple of policemen broke into the house. After searching, they found Jack's body.
"Well, now we know where the stink was coming from," said the one.
"Yeah, he's definitely been here awhile. You better call it in and get a meat wagon out here. This guys getting pretty ripe."
"That's not my stink!" said Jack's ghost. "Look in the toilet, there's nothing!"
This story is not really scary except for the fact that I betcha it happens a lot around the world: same circumstances, same outcome. People dying on toilets from straining too hard -- they bust a vessel in their head or something, and then GAME OVER, man. So if you're constipated, take a laxative people for Pete's sake. Don't die on the toilet. Please, don't die on the toilet.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN
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DEAD PICKS
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| | Voodoo Saints (13+) Weird Tales and Twisted Tales winner. A boy and girl unknowingly overthrow a tyrant. #2144276 by Kotaro |
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DEAD LETTERS
Quick-Quill
Shutter Island. I watched the movie and have watched the ending over a few times because it messed with my mind. Devil-That movie had me in awe. It mesmerized me and cause me to write a plot with the same type of surprise ending. When all the characters are intertwined. That movie still inspires me to rework my plot and write it.
Beholden
Thank you very much for including my short story, Undead Ambition, among your Editor's Picks.
Just a thought in response to your DEAD LETTERS comment: I know what spurs me to comment on a newsletter - the author asks a question! We all have opinions and writers love writing about theirs. ;)
wdwilcox
Okay, I can ask a question! How about this . . . Where's the worst possible place you can think of to die? |
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