Comedy: January 18, 2023 Issue [#11757] |
This week: The Gift ... Edited by: Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥ More Newsletters By This Editor
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I was running out of time. Had to think of a special gift. It was then I found out that time was indeed on my side.
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The Gift ...
2023, the year of several special birthdays of loved ones and relatives. I don't know how this is done with your family, but when the kids grew up and started their own lives with family, the gift giving got way out of hand.
As a retired witch living the snowbird life, and with kids tending to their own family's needs, we decided that gifts should be more modest price-wise for Christmas and birthdays. We do however celebrate special birthdays with a better gift that marks another five years of life. Thus, we are great bi-decade birthday gift givers.
I sent a text to my daughter because I knew she was at work and didn't want to interrupt her a phone call
"Web-Daughter, could you find an great gift for your dad's upcoming, 70th birthday ?"
"Sure, Mom. Do you think he'd like a watch?"
My daughter is in a supervisory, training and jewelry selling position at Jared's Jewelry store. She's been doing it for years out in Denver Colorado. I thought about her question and remembered how often her Dad depended on watches. Of course, with him living out in California and me in New England and Florida, the answer wasn't so simple. I could ask him, but then it wouldn't be a surprise. I figured it's still a good gift because it is something to hold, use, and become a keepsake. A great celebratory gift for his 70th. I know most of us have cell phones with time and date in our faces daily, but this would be something more thoughtful and memorable.
"Yes, Web-Daughter, I think he'd like to have a nice gift to remind him of how old he is!"
"Oh, Mom, 70 is not old anymore. He's still working all the time. I'll check the display case and see what would be a great gift."
"Please send me a few pictures to choose from when you do."
"Sure Mom. Do you think he'll want one with the date on the watch?"
"Of course he would. We old people can't remember what day of the week it is, let alone the date!"
My phone alerted me of new messages. I looked at a couple style and face-color choices. One had a black face the other had cobalt blue. Well I got to tell you, I love cobalt blue almost as much as I love red and purple. I guess royal colors fit my witchy persona. I told her I liked the blue one with the silver band.
Then, another image comes in with slightly different features added. Now I am faced with deciding between one brand or another. Both are well-known watch maker names. One's automatic and charges by motion. Do not ask me what kind of motion it requires. I'm not going there. It's also shock resistant, so I shouldn't ponder that too much.
I studied both watch images and enlarged the photo. I saw something that convinced me my first choice is the one! There is a date on the one with the blue face. It says 1853. That's one hundred years before he was born. It seemed to make it a little more special in some way. It's all in the timing, I guess. Anyway, I made my decision. My daughter also liked the whole date on the watch thing and a century between births.
Next I braced myself for the price. In the mean time she sent me more info about the brand and how it's Swiss made and the marvels of this timepiece. Now I felt my wallet shrinking by each message. But I told myself to buck up and agree it was a meaningful milestone and should be celebrated appropriately, whatever it costs.
She continued on about how it has a crystal on top and on the bottom so you can look through the back into the watch seeing the working parts. I thought that was pretty cool.
When she got through her in depth description, she answered my query about cost. I was shocked — shocked, I tell you!
No, it wasn't beyond my budget. In fact the price she quoted me with her employee discount was so drastically reduced I questioned her sanity.
"Web-Daughter, I know my eyes are pretty bad, but could you please tell me if this number you quoted me is all you need for that watch? I mean, I went online and looked up the retail price and there's no way that covers the cost."
"Mom, it's the right price quote with my discount. Of course you can add shipping costs if you wish."
"Web-Daughter, tell me the truth. Is there a man outside the store on the corner wearing a long, overcoat? And, does he flash that coat open displaying a bunch of watches with a "Pssst, Buddy" line? You can't be serious!"
WebMom, don't make me have to ask you to pay me even less money."
To make it all even more convenient for me she told me I could pay her with an Amazon gift card. No check, no envelope, no stamp! This is the only way to shop for gifts.
Folks, I was so thrilled to be able to send a meaningful gift for a special birthday and at such a workable price. After I sent the gift card and included extra for shipping, I received an automated thank you card from Amazon sent from my daughter thanking me for the gift card.
This is where my senior moment kicked-in. I was so thrilled about the whole thing I replied to her "thank you" note to me with an "I love you!!!"
Moments later I got a reply from Amazon saying "Thanks for writing to us." To their automated bot they meant. Duhhhh!
I texted my daughter their bot reply, and said: "I got your thank you message from Amazon. Forgot it was a bot. I replied 'I love you!' I think the Amazon bot blushed, I'm still getting correspondence from the love-sick bot as we speak."
Web-Daughter ... " Oh, Mom!"
And that, folks, is a time on my side wrap for this edition of the Comedy Newsletter.
Until next time--laugh hard, laugh often!
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You know what next month, is ...
Not everyone is excited about it!
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February Prompt is the Annual Cupid Slam Poetry Contest! Always fun, always awful! The point is to write the awfullest 1-star poem slamming Cupid! See you there ...
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From my last Comedy Newsletter: "Comedy Newsletter (December 21, 2022)"
Paul
I just had my 2nd cataract surgery 2 weeks ago and I could not be happier. My vision is so clear I’m constantly amazed and I love it. There was absolutely no pain and the only “Slight” discomfort was having to wear a protective patch for the first night after surgery. The eye drops for a couple weeks is a mild bother too, but for what I got there were no problems encountered.
That sounds so much more civilized than what I'm going through with my glasses. It appears the prescription is not well-suited to my brain's mind's eye! I will be returning for a prescription do-over. Hopefully the next one works better. Unless it doesn't and then they convince my insurance company that I'm not a good fit with corrective lenses and need the cataract surgery.
Thank you for you comments on cataract surgery. I feel better knowing what a difference it makes in someone's life. I'll keep you updated!
There were some great replies to the Newsletter question posted on the Newsfeed. "What is your fondest memory of the holiday season?"
Some lucky people were surprised with an MB.
You just never know when the Witchy one has a spirit of giving.
See you next month, folks!
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