 Comedy: August 02, 2006 Issue [#1189] |
  Comedy
This week: Edited by: Beyond the Cloud9  
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Comedy a.k.a. funny stuff.
Whatever your writing style or reading preference, comedy finds its way into everyone’s life in some form. Take time to look around and see the humor in life. Learn to love and laugh at yourself, and laugh with others.
This newsletter is designed to give you tips and entertainment, but mostly to put a smile on your face! |
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I came across this "Recipe for Mothers" while reading a book. It reflects my own experiences in cooking, even before kids. It is funny enough that I'd like to share it with you...
A Recipe For Mothers by Robert J. Strand
Pre-heat the oven...check first for rubber balls or plastic ninja men or Barbie dolls or little cars which might have been lurking inside.
Clear the counter...of wooden blocks, hot-wheels cars, puzzle pieces or toy stoves.
Grease pan. Crack nuts. Measure flour...remove Jimmy's and Jean's hands from the flour.
Crack more nuts...to replace those which Jimmy and Jean have just eaten.
Sift flour, baking powder and salt...get broom and dustpan. Sweep up pieces of bowl which was knocked to the floor, accidentally, of course.
Find a second mixing bowl...answer ringing doorbell, then return to kitchen. Remove Jimmy's and Jean's hand from the bowl. Wash Jimmy and Jean. Answer phone. Remove about one-half inch of salt from greased pan. Call for Jimmy and Jean. Look for Jimmy and Jean.
Grease another pan...answer phone. Return to kitchen and find Jimmy and Jean. Remove their hands from bowl and greased pan. Remove layer of nuts from greased pan. Sternly turn to Jimmy and Jean who knock the second bowl off counter while attmpting to get away. Wash kitchen floor, counter, cupboards, stove, dishes, utensils and walls. Search for Jimmy and Jean. Find Jimmy and Jean and sit with the to explain that you are not really that angry with them.
Final scene...CALL THE BAKERY and order a cake. Tuck Jimmy and Jean into bed for their naps.
Take two aspirin.
Lie down.
I must say that I'm the type of cook that just calls the bakery first. That isn't always true. I recently attempted to bake my brother a birthday cake with a recipe that wasn't very specific on its instructions. I had the ingredients right, but it gave no details on exactly how to mix them. The cake sunk in the middle and came out the consistency of a small loaf of bread rather than a fluffy cake. It still tasted pretty good, but it wasn't really what it was intended to be. Thankfully my brother appreciated the effort. But I still ran by the bakery and picked up a cake!
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  Questions & Comments
esprit  writes:
Restaraunt Etiquette for Toddlers by Zoe Elise
Sherry, this had me laughing from start to finish! Wonderful humor! As for me and my house, we went on a lot of picnics in the park. 
Puditat writes:
Sherri, I loved the editorial by your daughter, Zoe. It was great fun and I could picture it all.
dogfreek21 writes:
Zoe Elise did GOOD!! This is so true. When going to a restaurant, there was a toddler or infant at the next table observing the restaurant etequette laid out here to the letter!
Glad y'all enjoyed the newsletter. I'll send along your comments to Zoe!
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