 Comedy: November 13, 2024 Issue [#12840] |
This week: For The Sake of Argument Edited by: GeminiGem🐾  
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Hi there! I am GeminiGem🐾 , one of the regular editors of the Comedy Newsletter. |
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For The Sake of Argument
Have you ever argued with a fictional character? Please say I'm not the only one.
I am not a fan of arguing. In my youth, I argued without any qualms. Now, I find it just doesn't suit my purposes or general mood at this point. That isn't to say that I won't tell you my point of view if it differs from yours, it just means that I don't bother to belabor the point. If you don't agree or we don't see eye-to-eye, I am more than willing to leave that be.
That works well enough for the people I encounter in my life. It doesn't work for fictional characters, at least not my own fictional characters. If arguing with a person seems like a fruitless endeavor, arguing with a fictional character is like arguing with a brick wall.
Sometimes my characters are super helpful. The brand-new ones tend to be the most helpful. I can ask them questions like, "What's your name?" or "Who are you?" and the answers will pour forth.
My established characters? Not so much.
I write serial short stories. Is that a thing? No idea, but that's what I do. The stories are all connected, loosely sometimes, but the characters reappear in the stories. Once they get comfortable, though, the arguing begins.
I will present the idea of a new idea for a story that I think will be great for a set of characters.
"Nope, can't do that," one of the characters will say.
"Wait, what do you mean, 'no'? I want to enter the contest, and that's what I think will work with the prompt," I explain.
"No," said the character (who will remain unnamed to protect the innocent).
"Why not? I think it is good."
The character shrugs, maybe rolls their eyes.
Undaunted, I start the writing process. Since I am a confirmed pantser, that means I start writing at the first paragraph with zero preplanning. I will make it to the second paragraph,then pause to read it over.
Sometimes, it's awful. Nothing interesting happens in the beginning of the story and I lose traction with the idea. I suspect I know what the problem is. My characters are not on board with the story, so it isn't going to work.
"Aw, c'mon, guys! It will be fine if you play along. You'll see. You know things always get better during the editing process, but I have to start somewhere!"
No response. There is only silence filled with the chirping of crickets.
"Are you kidding me? Where is that enthusiasm you all had for the last story?" I ask my recalcitrant characters.
"This isn't anything like the last story. That one was fun. This one is...boring."
"Boring? It just started. The first two paragraphs of the rough draft. How could you possibly know it is boring?"
The problem is, they aren't wrong. Nonetheless, I pout because I feel put out. It is bad enough when other people don't care for your writing, but when the characters think it stinks, it is rough on the ego.
"You need to get to the good stuff faster," insists the character. I don't have time for all this description and set-up."
"Yeah, yeah, I'll do that in editing later."
"Nope, not going to work. If you can't even get my interest from the very start, how are you ever going to get anyone to read it?"
This was the final blow to my ego and why I hate arguing with my fictional characters, even if I have to admit defeat. It is also why I had to admit that I do argue with my characters.
One day, I may be a strong enough writer to admit that the characters are in control. It would be freeing. I will probably waste much less time on an argument I could never win. My ego will be a lot less battered and bruised. It could be a very nice thing.
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An intentionally bad poem. Wrote this in 5 minutes. You won't believe it took me that long
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| | | VANITY VARMINTS (E)
a critter-cally acclaimed flash fable where vanity refuses to yield to reality
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