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Grandmas are moms with lots of frosting. ~Author Unknown
When a child is born, so are grandmothers. ~Judith Levy
What children need most are the essentials that grandparents provide in abundance. They give unconditional love, kindness, patience, humor, comfort, lessons in life. And, most importantly, cookies. ~Rudolph Giuliani
Grandchildren are the dots that connect the lines from generation to generation. ~Lois Wyse
Remember life’s a great big sled
And you’re here for the ride! ~Sharon Picano
Everyone needs to have access both to grandparents and grandchildren in order to be a full human being. ~Margaret Mead
Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do. Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children. ~Alex Haley
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Thoughts from the grandmotherly side of things.
As I write this, we are awaiting word about grandchild #10's arrival. It doesn't matter how many you have, grandchildren are an eagerly waited addition to the clan, tribe, or family. We know this one is a daughter. The nursery and more clothing than this child can possibly wear are all in readiness. Mom called early this morning on her way to the hospital. My husband hung up on his daughter as he thought it was his alarm going off. Happily she then called me. Happy early-pre-dawn wake-up call! Better even than coffee!
There is something about the connection between grandparents and grandchildren. Our legacy continues, the door to a new future is opened and we see just a bit farther down the road to tomorrow.
This will be the first grandchild that I will be around from day one. I know I am not the stereotypical grandmother idea that I grew up with. No grey-haired bun graces my neck, I can't sew a button on without drawing blood, and I'm not much of a baker. But my grandmother's cookie jar sits on the counter and it is always full. I have the lap, the rocking chair and the heart.
One of our granddaughters turned three yesterday. Another turns six today. Lots of birthdays. One more chair at the holiday table, another stocking to hang on the fireplace and hearts that seem to always expand to fit one more ton of love.
I like to think we have wisdom to share along with the stories she won't have heard a million times. I look forward to singing the same songs I sang to my kids to yet another grandchild. She will be a fourth child with three older brothers to watch over and protect her. Will she be a girly-girl like her birthday buddies, or a tomboy out hitting her brothers? Will she share hunting with grandpa or writing with grandma? Holy terror or absolute angel? Or both? *grin* Probably both!
I am thinking about my grandparents today. I had grand and glorious adventures with my grandmother Annie. My grandma, I lost when I was four and couldn't understand (then) why everyone was crying when I thought heaven was a a happy place to go. Heaven seems closer today, or these days (to be more precise) as I grow older. When I was a child, grandparents always seemed so old. I am not old even though the joints creak and the muscles ache a bit more than they used to. But I look in the mirror and 'see' much younger than that face in the mirror. (Well, most of the time I do.)
Yesterday, my husband and I were talking of legacies and wills. Today we shall celebrate the birth of our youngest grandchild. Time seems to expand and collapse all in the same instant. I am that email that circulates about safer times, when we played in the neighborhood 'til dark and no one worried. We lived without computers, video games and cell phones. We remember Kennedy being assassinated and man walking on the moon. What will this new generation accomplish? What will their 'good old days' mean to them? Things that seem like 'yesterday' to me, will be 'ancient history' to her. The world has changed. It is changing once again today. I can't wait!
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Memories.....
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| | Flower Buds (E) A free-verse poem about flower buds and their potential. #938182 by Harry |
and in honor of my grandmother and all grandparents who keep history alive!
| | Trunk (E) True title is My Grandmother's Grandfather's Trunk #947871 by Fyn |
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Feedback from the newsletter on reviewing. And there was LOTS of it!
Coolhand : You covered all the bases--the whole aspect of reviewing-- quite well, evenhanded and with insightful examples. In my opinion, writing is the most introspective endeavor one can tackle. Those serious about it will learn much about themselves. Great newsletter!
How very true. . .and to paraphrase . . .and by our reviewers we are taught!
Puppycat : You have stated your points very well. Thanks for the details. Hopefully this will make people understand the review more clearly.
Hopefully.....
Quick-Quill :
Your newsletter this week is very apropo! I have been doing a review-a-thon. I am careful with each review to to give my personal opinion about the three points that make up a story Goal,Motivation and conflict. In a long piece some of these are not always evident in each chapter; but they should be. Rating and reviewing seem at odds in some of the reviews I have received. They liked what I wrote, offered some advice and a correction or two then rated it 3.5???? What is that? I have decided that ratings are subject to the person, who is reviewing, own interpretation of the rating guide. I don't seek stories with a rating for this reason, I might miss a good story some else has given a low rating or review to.
I would rather have 10 reviews to read and take the common threads as the truth than have 2 reviews that say "I liked your story ...for 225 character and that is it!" Why did you like it? How did it make you feel? say something more than just "I like it"
Good idea!
SummerLyn Guthrie : Wishing you wonderful moments and thank you for sending these newsletters. I receive a lot from them.
Thank you!
stephenm : Nice work! An attitude I take with me every time I receive a review is that the comments offer a perspective on how that reader saw or felt about what I had written. If the reviewer said they didn't get something or thought something was missing that is a strong indication to me that my writing wasn't clear enough.
Perhaps that is a message you could emphasize also. Different people view things differently, and if I missed on reaching someone's funny bone, or failed to excite or mystify them, then I appreciate them telling me.
I don't believe there is such a thing as a bad review, after all it is another's perspective. I may not agree with it but that's beside the point.
Keep up the encouragement,
Excellent comment!
Bluesman : cannot agree more. I received a response from a black-case which had two stories on line. My comments on the 895 word short story were mainly on the use of the word "seem". It seems, that every time you would turn around this word would pop up!
The room seemed darker and warmer. Its contents seemed possessed with a spirit. I couldn't stay in the room because of the spirit I seemed to feel...
I was merely pointing out, that the overuse weakened the storyline, and took away from the magic of his/her horror scene. I truly wish this person would've had an open mind. I was only trying to help.
Seems I certainly stirred up a hornet's nest! I'm thinking that perhaps that all reviews should be taken in the manner intended (either they loved it or want to offer suggestions or didn't like it or....) and keep the good comments and critiques and toss the less than helpful ones. Reviewing is just as much of an art as writing. Amazing what one learns about writing from writing reviews!
Cubby : Very well stated, Fyn. I agree 100%! My writing has greatly improved since I joined WDC back in 2002.
Mine too, mine too
lotto : I appreciated this edition of the newsletter. You are correct. We writers occasionally produce magic and at other times, garbage. But even the trash can teach us something as can every review we receive. Constructive feedback is helpful even if it stings a little. To quote a couple of tired clichés, "what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger" and "no pain no gain."
Amen
Briar Rose : Thanks for a great newsletter, fyn. Most of what I have learned about my own writing has been because of reviewers who have taken some of their own time and energy to read and work on a review for me. I don't always agree with their ideas and suggestions, but, at the very least, it makes me think about my writing in a new way and that is always a good idea. I would recommend that if anyone doesn't want any negative comments or critiques, they should state that clearly on their portfolio, thereby saving everyone involved a lot of time and hurt. In my opinion, the in-depth reviews - which include both the good and the bad - are what make this site such a good home for aspiring writers.
I totally agree!!!
sarahreed : I think this follows well to the comments I made last time about mindset. We can either be open-minded or closed-minded when reading reviews of our work. We can react badly to negative reviews or realize that it’s an opportunity to grow. We still may not make the changes suggested, but we can analyze what there are saying and consciously choose which way we go with a piece. On the flip-side, this also applies to reviewers. I never write a review if I’m in a bad mood or closed-minded. I admit that I get this way, but I don’t know that everyone does. I’ve received reviews where I’ve been left wondering if the person is having a bad day and is taking it out on me. So now my advice goes both way - do not review or respond to reviews when you are in a negative mode. Just don’t do it. So your review or response may not be timely. It’s better to give a positive response that is late than a negative one that is timely.
So true.
writersblock54 : Wow! This was a great newsletter! I loved the advice you gave about reviewers. And it really kept me wanting to read on.
Glad you liked it!
greg : On the topic of reviewing, I would add that writing.com goes to great lengths to encourage it. We are given incentives to write a review every day, and to review writers we haven't reviewed before. If a writer doesn't like getting reviews, I would suggest that this isn't the right web site for them.
There is, however, a place to check when we create new items that turns off the rate/review function. Reviews may not be for everyone and they can still both enjoy and benefit from the site. But for those of us who like writing them and/or appreciate receiving them, WDC is the greatest place on earth! *smile*
Split Infinitive : Some good reminders here about giving and receiving reviews. Reviewers should keep in mind that there is more than one way to go about writing a story, so try to avoid telling others "how it's done".
It's also a good idea, when giving a review, I check the author's bioblock for relevant information. The story you were about to tear to shreds might be the first effort of a fourteen-year-old immigrant who is still learning English, in which case you might go a little easier on them.
Informed reviewing--great idea. The important thing in all this is an effort to help others become better writers as we, ourselves, strive to do as well.
Caledonia Lass : I would like to add something to this review information. First of all, the criticisms given in reviews probably would not sound as harsh if the person was in the room with them, face to face. When people are behind a computer screen, they tend to be a little bolder. Recipients of reviews are also often a little touchy and will add the "tone" of what they are reading themselves, which may not be the tone the reviewer was using. Take these things into consideration. My first "critical" review really wasn't as critical as I made it out to be. It upset me, made me complain and whine, however when I went back to it, I read it carefully and took the suggestions in stride. Don't ever assume reviews are personal attacks, because they may not be intended that way!
Thanks for a great newsletter and have an awesome week!
GOOD comment. Excellent advice!
DRSmith : Good piece, Fyn, however controversial the old Review beast can be. If one were to disrobe this ogre, they'd see one of two sexes: one being subjective taste/reaction; the other authoritative critique. People need to know the diff... . If you no like, move on; if you spot areas that you can convey with specific authority as to why and how to fix, fine. Those serious about writing skills would welcome meaningful critique to improve a piece. Sifting thru the inane is tedious and non-productive... and hence, for me, I'd like to see an option whereby the author can DELETE the "Star" field. Keep the bloody stars, but give me a qualified overview of literary impact and legit fixes anyday. It's pretty tough to argue against a beast with alluring curves in all the right places.
Ah, my friend, you always make me smile! Personally, I have a file of emails/reviews that will be incredibly helpful as I go back and edit/revise/rehash and fix. This is what i call my 'treasure' folder because that is where I can go to glean what i need to make my writing better! And, happily, it seems it shall never run low. *grin*
Zeke : I've often thought that if I didn't want reviews then I shouldn't post things. Granted, some reviews are not helpful, but like all art, a review is only another person's perspective.
yup yup
Adriana Noir : Well said, Fyn. When someone stops learning and closes themselves off from new ideas and suggestions, they also stop growing. You offered some great food for thought here.
Thanking you!
JACE : Thank you, Miss Fyn, for both quoting me in your NL and for featuring my essay. I know you asked my permission to quote me, but I can't tell you what a lift I got actually seeing it in print. You made my day!
That reminds me--don't forget to tell the author what he or she did right amid all the constructive criticism.
I try to remember that each person is unique--including the person reviewing my offering. His(or her) opinion is bound by the perspective of an individual set of life circumstances. Some technical points may be black and white, but opinion never is.
Glad I made your day. I love it when I can find a line to use in my quotes section as I did again in this newsletter.
And yes, when reviewing always, always find something right!
Georgianna Lyn d'Juracetys : When I first posted writing to this site, I'd recieved several decent constructive reviews. Then WHAM, I was hit by one that basically told me the story royally sucked and was "unbelievable." (it is autobiographical-I survived it so I guess I wouldn't be alive, if I didn't believe I was not DEAD- yeah, wrap your head around this convoluted thinking <wink> Bigsmile). I checked out a couple of pieces in the reviewers port and saw that we had polar opposites in tastes and styles. So, sometimes a bad review can actually be a 'compliment.' With the bad review, one can always respectfully ask the reviewer to point out specific examples of issues that need fixing, if not given in a detailed review.
good idea!
NickiD89 : Great NL, Fyn! I recently wrote a short story that I was very excited about, and soon after I posted it the reviews began coming in -- Most could be summarized by "Hated it." Some reviewers were professional and offered constructive criticism, others were brutal in their honesty to the point of being rude. But you know what? EVERY review had something in it I needed to hear about that story, and I used each one somehow during the many, many revisions I made. Seeing your story through the eyes of the reader is vital and reviews are the most useful tool to gain this perspective. I had to toughen up, which wasn't always easy, but I grew as a writer and that's the goal.
YES!!!!!!
Marleigh Rose : Thank you SO much for highlighting this issue of negative responses to critical reviews. I've also had the, "you're a newbie, you don't count," responses and even had a member so incensed as to cuss at me about a rating. It's good to have these things pointed out!!
Bottom line:we are all writers and using reviews as a tool works from both directions. I know I learn about my writing from both writing and receiving reviews.
Sandy~HopeWhisperer : I agree 100% with your newsletter. We cannot grow nor improve without changing from time to time. The same is true of our writing.
I personally have had the misfortune of receiving a scathing response to a well-intentioned and I felt compassionate review. I apologized to the author if I had offended them in any way, yet they still blocked me from any more of their writing.
I really felt they had done a good job of the storyline but needed to improve on basics like punctuation, redundancy, et cetera...
As an author who wishes to ALWAYS improve on my writing I ALWAYS welcome reviews. Two or three sets of eyes is always better than one...and who knows another prospective could help you write the best piece you've ever done.
Thanks for the Great newsletter.
Multiple eyes have always helped me too.
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Whew! I guess we all need to remember that we are members of a team seeking to excel and to help others excel along the way. The watchwords are 'constructive criticism' and should be given and received in that manner. Also, that a newbie to the site does not mean that they are a newbie to writing any more than a seasoned member is necessarily an expert. We are all learning and growing at our own speeds and inclinations! We are WDC and we rock! |
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