 Comedy: January 06, 2010 Issue [#3476] |
  Comedy
This week: Edited by: Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥmas  
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Taking Time to Ponder
It’s time to step back and look at the year that just ended. Then I will think about New Year’s resolutions. Let’s take a peek at Christmastime at Webwitch’s house ... |
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Happy New Year Folks! I hope you had enjoyable holidays. For those of you who are curious about how “the hunt,” for a Christmas tree, went over the holidays, I’ll fill you in. 
WW, Web-Son and WL, found a new tree farm. The problem with newer farms is that they are sparse in comparison to those that have had many years of growth and replanting. We did manage to find the only two trees that were large enough for our decorating needs. One was a tall, but thin fir, the other a full, but floppy needled pine. We took the fuller, floppy one and did manage to get it picked and cut down within the fifteen minute rule adopted by WL.
The tree was actually wired with lighting within one day; all three-thousand of them! It was decorated, and stood proudly as we counted down the days to Christmas. While this was going on, WL decided to place a “Fire Boss,” wood burning stove inside the same room where the tree was standing. Actually, it was only two feet from the ornamented delight. He thought it would be an excellent way to save on the cost of heating fuel. He was right! 
The tree seemed to be holding up well for the first couple of weeks. However, by Christmas week, I was able to touch the branches and they started to crumble in my hand. “This is not good! ” I declared, but Christmas was merely days away and perhaps it would hold up at least until after the holiday meal was over and the company left.
Yup, that’s right, there was no way this tree was going to last. So, the day before Christmas, I finally broke down and accepted the fact that it had to be removed from the house before it caught fire. We quickly pulled the ornaments off the branches, which were now pointed downward and struggled to get it out the door and on the porch where it would live out the remainder of its days in cool comfort, lights still glowing through the night. I felt terrible about how droopy the tree was. Web-Son, ever the diplomat, said, “Mom, we’ll just call it the weeping, Christmas willow tree.”
We scurried to place a fake tree in a corner of the dining room. At least Christmas dinner would still have the magic of beautiful lights and sparkling ornaments. 
Ah, the thrill of Christmas morning came and I was prepared to make a feast for the relatives. Suddenly I heard, “Webbie, get down here quickly. You are not going to like this!”
Web-Lock was right, I didn’t like what I saw at all. I was led to a guest room off of the kitchen. (Rambling, New England houses have these little cubbies everywhere that are additions added as needed over the centuries.) There was water dripping all over everything! The guest room was directly under another “cubby” room upstairs, where a frozen pipe burst. Geez, I wonder why that “Fire Boss” didn’t help keep that pipe from freezing. 
Yes, ‘twas the season to be jolly--NOT! Web-Son, shut off the main valve, however, with company coming to dinner we needed to have water. The three of us spent the next few hours, turning on and off several connectors until the one in the upstairs room was shut off, leaving the rest of the house with water flow, followed by mopping and blotting up soggy rooms. Another crisis has been temporarily averted.  Christmas was saved at Chez Web~Witch. Everyone had a delightful time. We laughed about the recent comedy of errors and ate a hardy meal.
There is another unexpectedly good thing that came out of all this pipe bursting. I am now the proud owner of my own, indoor skating rink! Ain’t life grand?
So, folks, While all of you think about your New Year’s resolutions, I’ll just focus on reading “Plumbing for Dummies!” How hard can it be to solder a couple pipes together? I mean, it’s not rocket surgery! 
Until next time--laugh hard, laugh often!
Ta,
WW |
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Unhealthy food--feeling a little bloated after the holidays?
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Kids and their sweet tooth!
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We don't darn socks!
And ...
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We don't do well at Wal-Mart, either!
Check out this blog. Hooves is Fab-Moo-Losa!
Kids do the darndest things!
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Bull's eye or bird's eye? |
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LJPC - the tortoise 
Hi WW!
I enjoyed your NL, as always. It's wonderful to find comedy in Christmas. Maybe someone should try to write some comic Christmas carols!
Laura
Thanks, Laura! I do believe there are humorous carols floating around. One comes to mind, "We Three Kings of Orient, are, tried to smoke a rubber cigar ... 
Acme
Thanks for bringing the Christmas cheer of 'The Hunt' to readers. Have a smashing holiday
Thanks, Acme! I hope your holidays were wonderful! I enjoyed mine. I certainly appreciated coming away from "the hunt," with my face unbruised!
Winnie Kay 
Another great NL, WW. I'm with WL holding the keys and timing the "hunt." Hope your lights stay on this year. You deserve a Merit Badge for Bearability. Good luck with the "branch, snap-back position."
winnie
We were in that tree farm and out quickly, before any permanent damage could be done. Thank you so much for the feedback. "Bearability," I like that!
Katya the Poet 
Oh, my goodness, I laughed and cringed! Good luck on the upcoming HUNT, and I am also eager to hear about the spiritual encounter with SANTA!!
I survived "the hunt," however, I am still waiting for Santa to get me my picket fence! 
drjim
WW, the right to arm bears has caused much stir in legal circles! If and when I live to see another tree gathering, I will make sure to wear the proverbial blaze orange! A wonderful, spiritual and merry Xmas to you this year!
As always,
Doc
Thanks, Doc! I hope your Christmas was great! Happy 2010!
Thanks for the feedback, folks! We editors really appreciate it!!!
Have a wonderful New Year! See you next month.
Web~Witch |
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