 Comedy: July 21, 2010 Issue [#3866] |
  Comedy
This week: My Son, the Terrorist! Edited by: Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥ  
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You know something, folks? If you happen to be born with Web~Witch blood coursing through your veins, you are a marked person. Inevitably, you will be caught up in a situation that is both frightening and comical at the same time.
This Newsletter takes you on the portion of the trip to my daughter's wedding, involving Web-Son. Let's take a look...
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Weddings bring on lots of nervous tension. This is especially true if the bride lives a couple thousand miles away from her mother. WL and I, planned to make a vacation out of this event by driving from our New England home to my daughter's in Colorado. We thought the trip would be a great way to visit out-of-state friends along the way and see some interesting sites.
Web-Son, who chose to take some accelerated summer courses at college, could not be on the trip. He chose to fly to Colorado for the weekend of the wedding. All of our plans were excellently plotted for the best results, which means that Murphy's Law would surely kick-in with a vengeance.
I found out the extent of the crazy adventure when he arrived at the hotel, the day before the wedding, with a story that confirmed my earlier thoughts - - the WW bloodline. 
"So, Web-Son, how was your trip?"
"Well, Mom, it started off with no drama. I had the airport limo service pick me up for the trip to the airport. I had a discussion with another couple about why the wife's bottle of nail polish remover would not be allowed on the plane. " This is where WS goes into his knowledge of chemistry and bombs and things that make a mother's heart cringe. 
He proceeds to explain what happened when he got to the airport gate in preparation for his flight.
"They made us all stand in line with our shoes in our hands. Then they told every other person to go through the metal detector. I was in the other 50% who were told to go through the x-ray machine for a total body scan that leaves little to the imagination. After that, I was in the next 50% who were told to step aside for a body-wanding with a special glove that checks for residue on clothing. After that, they told me to move along to the boarding line."
"Oh, well I guess everything went smoothly for you, then, WS."
"Not so fast, Mom! I was then pulled out of line and told to go with this guy in a suit and tie and no-neck. He took me to this room and said that I tested positive for C-4 on the clothes rubbing test." 
"Son, were you dabbling a little with your chemistry set prior to leaving for the airport? Is there a volatile object awaiting my return home? Son, where have I gone wrong?!!"
"No, there is nothing to worry about. I didn't make any bombs or thermite, recently. I didn't know how they found this chemical on me until they pointed to a tiny spot on my jeans. It was a dot of green paint from when I painted my room."
"Oh, so they got their answer and let you board the plane?"
"No, not yet. They started questioning me."
"We see that you are traveling alone with no luggage. Why is that?"
"Because my Mom took my changes of clothes with her in the car. She and WL are driving to Colorado."
"I see. Well then, why didn't you go with them? "
"Because I'm taking some college courses this summer."
"What' s your major? Do you know what you want to do? Are you interested in chemistry or physics, by chance?"
"Chemistry is fun but I am in Liberal Arts for now because I don't know what I want to do."
"You seem a bit nervous, son. Why is that?"
"Because I'm here with you and your accomplice at the computer, instead of on the plane to my sister's wedding."
"I see you recently got your driver's license. What kind of car do you drive?"
"A Buick Regal."
"Hmmmm, I see. Is that your father's car?"
"No, it's my grandmother's car. "
"Tell me about this grandmother."
Well folks, this interview with the airport security went on for a few more minutes before he was released. The final question that got him to the boarding line was ...
"By the way, why did your mother decide to drive to Colorado rather than fly?"
"Because she didn't want to put up with this crap!"
Ain't it the truth, folks! 
That's all she wrote for this month's Comedy Newsletter.
Until next time, laugh hard--laugh often!
Ta,
WW
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Joy 
Thanks for another hilarious story, WW.
Now that you've told it, you must be feeling better. I, too, like laughing at things people usually cry over. 
I'm happy you enjoyed it, Joy.  You're right, it's much better to laugh at stressful situations than cry. The bounce-back time is much quicker that way. 
Acme 
Hehe! Sounds like a fun celebration over at WW's Thanks for the item highlight, too! x
It was strangely entertaining, Acme. You're very welcome for the highlight. 
LJPC - the tortoise
You are hysterical, WW.  I always enjoy your misadventures; you could write a weekly comic strip. You highlighted excellent items, too. I catered a party - once. I accidentally forgot two marinaded chickens on the top of the commercial ovens in the venue and two tables of people got their missing entrees an hour late.  No more of that for me. Good luck with yours and Happy Birthday to WL. -- Laura
Thank you, Laura. As a matter of fact, WL and I have discussed doing a comic strip. We are currently brushing-up on our sketching skills. How very perceptive of you to bring up the comic strip angle.
Thanks for your feedback, folks. We editors really appreciate it!
WW
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