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For Authors: August 18, 2010 Issue [#3923]

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For Authors


 This week: Dialogue Tips
  Edited by: Cubby Author IconMail Icon
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Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

          Hello, everyone! Welcome to this edition of the For Authors newsletter. *Smile* This week's topic is focused on dialogue, but first off, I'd like to share a few quotes with you. Enjoy!

Quotes:


Dialogue should simply be a sound among other sounds, just something that comes out of the mouths of people whose eyes tell the story in visual terms.
~ Alfred Hitchcock

*

It's dialogue that gives your cast their voices, and is crucial in defining their characters
~ Stephen King

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Most of the time, tough, combative, adversarial dialogue is much more exciting than physical action.
~ Sol Stein

*

Readers take in dialogue one thought at a time. A frequent mistake of beginners is to combine thoughts, which may be suitable for other forms of writing but not for dialogue. Another mistake is speechifying. Three sentences at a time is tops, yet many beginners write speeches that go on and on.
~ Sol Stein

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If you're a fiction writer, though, I can tell you how to let people talk through you. Listen. Just be quiet, and listen. Let the character talk. Don't censor, don't control. Listen, and write.
~ Ursula K. Le Guin

*

Dialogue heavily weighted with adverbs after the attributive verb is cluttery and annoying. Inexperienced writers not only overwork their adverbs but load their attributives with explanatory verbs: "he consoled," "she congratulated." They do this, apparently, in the belief that the word said is always in need of support, or because they have been told to do it by experts in the art of bad writing
E.B. White

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The whole idea is not to duplicate dialect but to suggest it.
~ William Sloane

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It's not enough simply to record the way people actually talk. The dialogue must be concentrated, shaped, dramatically moving, in a way that real-life conversation seldom is
~ Philip Gerard


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Dialogue Tips



         Dialogue needs to be woven into a story naturally. It should never be choppy, forced, or unnecesessary. Dialogue, along with expression, action, and other body language, will breathe life into your character.

         Below you will find a few tips, inlcuding examples, to watch out for.

          *Note1* What sort of personality does your character have? Is s/he soft-spoken? Loud? Angry? Anxious? Your character's actions should match up with their dialogue.

Example:

*Thumbsdown*          Billie Jo polished Mrs. Rockafeller's silver with care. "I hate that stupid witch! She ain't nothin' but a bald-faced liar!"

*Thumbsup*          Billie Jo polished Mrs. Rockafeller's silver with a fury. "I hate that stupid witch! She ain't nothin' but a bald-faced liar!"


         *Note1* Eliminate words that are unnecessary, ones that only stretch out the conversation for no apparent reason.

Example:

*Thumbsdown*
         Rod pulled out the chair for Lacy. "Sit," he said, pointing to the chair. "I'd like to talk to you right now."
         Lacy walked over to the chair and sat down. "What do you want to talk to me about?" she said with a question on her face.
         Rod looked uncomfortable. "It's about the other night when you went out. You said you were to going to your sister Hannah's apartment."
         Lacy's face reddened. "I said my sister's apartment, not which sister."
         "You only have one sister," said Rod. "At least that's what I thought."
         "I never told you about the other one," she said, "because you were married to her once, before I knew she was my sister."


*Thumbsup*
         Rod pulled out the chair. "Sit," he said, nodding. "I'd like to talk to you."
         Lacy did as she was told. "What is it?" she asked.
         Rod looked uncomfortable. "It's about the other night. You said you were to going to your sister Hannah's apartment."
         Lacy's face reddened. "I said my sister's apartment, not which sister."
         "You only have one sister," said Rod. "At least that's what I thought."
         "I never told you about the other one," she said, "because you were married to her once."



         *Note1* Be wary of too many tags.

Example:

*Thumbsdown*
         "Can you feel the energy?" Cassandra asked.
         "No," said Kris.
         "Can you feel it now?" Cassandra asked.
         "No," Kris said. "Not at all."
         "What about now?" asked Cassandra.
         "Okay, now I feel it," said Kris.


*Thumbsup*
         "Can you feel the energy?" Cassandra asked.
         "No," said Kris.
         "Can you feel it now?"
         Kris frowned. "No. Not at all."
         "What about now?"
         Kris nodded. "Yes! I feel it!"



         *Note1* Also be wary of too many various tags.

Example:

*Thumbsdown*
         "I'm in love!" exclaimed Rhonda.
         "With who?" demanded her best friend, Mark.
         "You know," stated Rhonda.
         "No, tell me," hissed Mark.
         "With you, silly!" Rhonda sang out.
         "With me?" Mark inquired with surprise.


*Thumbsup*
         "I'm in love!" Rhonda exclaimed.
         "With who?" asked her best friend, Mark.
         "You know." She winked.
         "No, tell me, just who are you in love with, Rhonda?"
         "With you, silly!" She threw her arms around him and kissed him on the cheek.
         Mark stared in disbelief. "With me?"



         *Note1* Make sure you use contractions when needed, unless you are writing a beginning reader book.

Example:

*Thumbsdown*
         Brenda fumbled with her daughter's necklace clasp. "I do not understand why these things cannot be easier."
         Margie grinned at her mother. "That is because we girls do not have enough to complain about."


*Thumbsup*
         Brenda fumbled with her daughter's necklace clasp. "I don't understand why these things can't be easier."
         Margie grinned at her mother. "That's because we girls don't have enough to complain about."



         *Note1* Be sure to use correct punctuation in dialogue. If someone screams, for example, an exclamation point should be used instead of a period or comma.

Example:

*Thumbsdown*
         Craig," Percy shouted from the tunnel. "Bring an extra flashlight. Mine's getting dim."
         "Okay," Craig yelled back. "I'll bring extra batteries, too."


*Thumbsup*
         "Craig!" Percy shouted from the tunnel. "Bring an extra flashlight! Mine's getting dim!"
         "Okay!" Craig yelled back. "I'll bring extra batteries, too!"


         *Note1* Throwing in some action breathes life into your character.

Example:

*Thumbsdown*
         "Tommy," Shelly said. "I need your help."
         "Doing what?" Tommy asked, surprised.


*Thumbsup*
         Shelly kicked the snow off her boots before speaking. "Tommy," she began as she unzipped her coat. "I need your help."
         "Doing what?" Tommy stared suspiciously at his cousin. Shelly had never asked for his help before, not ever. She'd always been in complete control of everything.


         There are whole books written on dialogue alone! It's an extremely important part of writing. For more details, go to your local library and check one out, or browse the Internet for more information. I've also included several Featured Items below, written by our own members here at WDC. *Smile*


One great resourse is Dialogue: Techniques and exercises for crafting effective dialogue by Gloria Kempton.

*Right* Question: What do you find most difficult about writing dialogue? Send me your response through the feedback window near the bottom of the page.

May you have an inspiring week and an exceptionally inspiring year!
Keep on Writing!

*Pencil* Cubby ")


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The Dialogue 500 Open in new Window. [18+]
Dialogues of 500 words or less.
by W.D.Wilcox Author Icon

 5 Tips & Advice On Writing Dialogue Open in new Window. [E]
Some quick concise advice on creating good Dialogue.
by Holly Abidi Author Icon

Book 5: Where the Oasis Blooms Open in new Window. [ASR]
Preview Chapters to Book 5 of The Hannaria Series (Sci-fi) Published December 2012
by Patricia Gilliam Author Icon

SAIDism Open in new Window. [E]
The bane of good dialogue.
by Ladyoz Author Icon

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by A Guest Visitor

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by A Guest Visitor

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Realistic Dialogue Open in new Window. [E]
How to write realistic dialogue.
by Jeff Author Icon

 Using Dialogue Tags Open in new Window. [E]
Should you use "Jack said" or "said Jack"? How often should dialogue be interrupted?
by Deborah Owen Author Icon


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Free_Rip Author IconMail Icon
An interesting newsletter - some good points. Coincidentally, I voted in a poll about a character name just before reading this.

I admit there are a few names I tend to stick to *Blush* In particular, the name 'Michelle' always comes to mind whenever I'm trying to think of a name for a strong or intelligent female. I have no idea why - I don't know anyone with that name, nor do I remember a book where a character had that name (of course there will be plenty out there, but I can't think of one.)

I think this might be a factor in re-occuring names - people want ones they don't already associate with pre-determined personalities, so they don't use ones of people they know/have read about. But if it's their own stories, the effect is opposite - because they liked the character and understood them fully...? I don't know - but if I was writing a new fantasy novel, I sure wouldn't name the main character Harry! *Wink*


~ That is so true! I've thought about using my kids' names in stories, but I just can't do it! I rarely use names of people I know well. Thanks for your great response! *Smile*

Nickelette Author IconMail Icon
Great newsletter! I actually don't tend to create my own character names. I like to search baby naming sites and pick names from one or two different countries to maintain a consistency with my characters.

~ Thanks! I love baby name books! I also like to look online for the top names currently used. *Smile*

BeElleGee Author IconMail Icon
Good tips! I'll definitely keep them in mine when I name my next character. Names come easy to me. It's titles that really trip me up. Maybe you could give us some tips on titles soon?

~ Great idea! I'll see what I can come up with in the near future. *Bigsmile*

Airila Author IconMail Icon
I always try to come up with different names for my characters. It doesn't seem fair, to me, that totally different character should be call the same names by the same author when they're not even in the same story.
But it's true... I tend to use Angela a bit more then i should. And when i find that another Angela has appeared in another story of mine, i change the name.
But doesn't it seem just a little strange to you that authors usually try their best to come up with names of every letter of the alphabet, and nearly never do people with the same name cross paths... only in real life?


~ You are SO right! I never really thought about that. Interesting! *Smile*

jlbane
Great article. Naming characters can be tricky but I've always followed what Isaac Asimov said on the subject. I can't remember the exact quote but the gist was this: Keep the name simple and easy to pronounce. This helps the reader not get confused and also does not interupt the flow of the story every time the reader needs to sound out the name. This applies mainly to sci-fi and fantasy where unusual names are common but the idea can be used as a general rule of thumb.

~ I like Asimov's advice! Thank you for sharing that! *Wink*

NickiD89 Author IconMail Icon
I do my best not to reuse character names, but certain ones come right to mind when I have a type of character in mind and am auditioning potential names. Maggie always pops into my head when I'm working on an easy-spirited, housewife character (I don't know why!), and Van is the most popular "alpha male" name, in my muse's point of view. *Bigsmile*

~ Thanks for sharing! *Bigsmile*

Zeke Author IconMail Icon
Most of the names in my stories come from real people I knew when I was a child. They for some reason seem to fit well into my fiction.
Zeke


~ Interesting! Thanks for sharing! *Smile*

Adriana Noir Author IconMail Icon
Great edition, Cubby! I loved your advice about making sure the name fits the period. Nothing jars a reader out of a story quicker than simple author "faux pas!"

~ *Bigsmile* Thank you!

Ladyoz Author IconMail Icon
Thank you for featuring my little article :) And thanks for that fabulous resource link. As to your question, I think the name Erin seems to pop up most often in my writing. The name is a tribute to the shared Irish heritage of my husband and myself.

~ Great name! *Smile*

atwhatcost
I don't disagree 100% with your take on names for characters; however, there are times when plain names work. The story I'm working on has a narrator named Mary March. Isn't that as plain a name as one can get? I hope so.

Mary is a simple, comfortable name with an association with a famous virgin of amazing resolve. And, Mary has a twin named Janna. I chose both first names to hint at their personalities, knowing most readers won't catch on (unless they've become as hooked as I am for finding the right meaning behind any given name.) The last name, March, hints at another story of sisters, Little Women. If my readers catch that, I hope it gives them that same warm feeling I associate with the name. I hope that, because these aren't those sisters, and I'd like the readers to be jarred out of those concepts as they read along.

So, I agree, don't use plain names, unless you are saying something in those names that advances the story. *Wink*


~ Absolutely! Thanks for sharing this. *Smile*

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
Great advice, Cubby! I always try to have my main and supporting characters have significantly different names, to make them distinctive... usually by having each start with a different letter, and each have a different number of letters. Similar names can be VERY confusing. I once read a screenplay where the ensemble cast was a family with rhyming names - Bill, Will, Phil, Gil, Lil, Dil, and Jill. Even with great characterization, imagine trying to keep them all straight! *Laugh*

~ I agree! And thank you... *Smile*

Coolhand Author IconMail Icon
Really good stuff on naming your characters, Cubby. It's more important than people think.

~ Yes, it certainly is. Thanks! *Smile*

Fyn Author IconMail Icon
Great newsletter! I usually research names I pick, especially if there is an underlying theme. Recently, A.T.B: It'sWhatWeDo Author IconMail Icon took the time to delve into my Dust Jacket and found the underlying themes buried therein! It was incredibly satisfying that someone took the time and found them! Places, people..excellent way to tie in a theme!

~ Wow! How cool!!! *Bigsmile*

Fiona Hassan Author IconMail Icon
A name I tend to use a lot, or want to use a lot (lol), is Anthony. For some reason I really like that name, and often when I come up with a character I think, "This sounds like an Anthony!" I'll have to be careful not to give into temptation!

-Fiona


~ Another great name! Thanks for sharing!

erozar
This reason is why I bought a Baby Name Book.

~ No writer should be without one, that's for sure! *Smile*

Lauriemariepea Author IconMail Icon
hi, cubby--
loved the quotations, really enjoyed your discussion about choosing character names. great newsletter!
to answer your question: i gravitate toward the name Jane for my strong female protagonists. i'm not sure why, but it just feels to me like a solid, unflashy character who has integrity, who knows who she is. somewhen, somewhere, i must've known a Jane in real life (or maybe in a story) who struck me just right. *Bigsmile*
thanks!
laurie


~ Kinda sounds like Jane Eyre! Have you read the book? I listened to the audio book. Great character! *Wink*

Timmie Author IconMail Icon
That was truly great advice. The name Monique, Moni for short, just wouldn't leave my head. I finally found a story where she could shine and after reading this newsletter I'm wondering if it's such a good idea to have her as the main character. Is Moni a good name for the main character? I am in love w/this name by the way.

~ Moni is a fine name for a character. *Smile* Thanks for sharing!

Early Author IconMail Icon
I used to use Damon a lot, Alexander, and Rowan. I discovered it's harder to use names that are already famous in literature or at least well known and keep your own character's personality. I now try to avoid names I've read in items of a similar genre as mine.

~ I know exactly what you're saying. Sometimes a name someone else has, sticks to that person's personality. *Smile*

THANKFUL SONALI Library Class! Author IconMail Icon
Good topic! I remember reading a detective story in which the detective is named Howard and the (finally revealed) criminal is named Henry, and I kept getting the two mixed up in my mind 'coz their names begin with the same letter! I was surprised at my own confusion, the two names don't sound similar otherwise, but it was a lesson as a writer! Thanks again, Sonali

~ Thank you for sharing that, Sonali! It's so true! *Smile*

GRAMPA ED Author IconMail Icon
When it comes to names to be used as a character in your book, try this. Take your name and spell it backwards, like so---Ed backwards would be De, then you might want to add another E so it would be Dee. Try it with countries also.
It has saved me as I did not want anyone to think I was writing about them.


~ Sounds fun! Okay... cubby... ybbuc... Hmm... Oh! How about Buck or Bucky! Hey, it works! A character named Buck would certainly stand out. Wow... Any other readers out there wanna try this??? *Delight*

Lexi Author IconMail Icon
In answer to your question, Rex and Lizzie seem to come up the most.

~ Thank you so much for sharing!

sylladi
Hi. Nice newsletter. I do have a tendency to reuse one particular name (or nick-name really): Lena. I have so many stories with characters named Helena, Selena, or just plain Lena that I sometimes confuse myself. But I love that name so much I can't seem to stop. =/

~ Thank you! Lena is a lovely name and flows nicely, rolling smoothly off the tongue. I can understand why you like it! *Smile*

Vibha Author IconMail Icon
Hello Cubby,

I tend to use the name "Nishant" in most of my short stories though not as a lead character. Nishant contributes in different ways to each story. At times, he is the lead character's best friend. At times, he is a colleague who makes you reflect on your actions. Since my stories are so far limited to a particular part of the world, Nishant is a single person who walks in and out of my stories at different times.

The word Nishant in Hindi means "The end of night" and is also the name of my 3 year old nephew.

~Vibha


~ How interesting! I love this idea! Thanks so much for sharing it. *Smile*

Briar Rose Author IconMail Icon
Before Twilight came out, most of my male characters started out as "Edward." Now, that name is off-limits forever! Thanks a lot, Stephanie Meyer! :) Otherwise, I go for Jack and Sam a lot.
I always struggle with character names. Thanks for a fun and informative newsletter!


~ Thank you and you are very welcome. Sometimes movies/book ruin it for a name, but sometimes they do the opposite. Thank you for sharing this! *Smile*

selo
Thank you for this newsletter on naming characters. I won't say it's something I especially have trouble with, but I like to give my characters names that are memorable but not too "out there". I also have a couple books that require foreign or made-up names, and the baby name sites are an invaluable tool for that. Never underestimate the power of a good name for your character!

~ You are absolutely correct! *Bigsmile* Thank you for your feedback!

mars Author IconMail Icon
Thank you for your wonderful newsletter about naming characters. Writing fiction seems a mountain too high to climb for me, but I can't help secretly dreaming that perhaps one day I might attempt the climb after all. And there came your newsletter, beginning with awesome quotes and giving such practical tips on naming, that suddenly I started to feel something "tingling" and a feeling arose in me what writing fiction might be about! So who knows what your newsletter has sparked in me?! Thanks so much for your real AUTHORS HELP!

~ Wow... That is so awesome to hear! I truly hope you'll be climbing that mountain soon! *Smile*

*Flower2* Thank you all for the wonderful feedback!

As always...

Have a wonderful week!
AND KEEP ON WRITING!!!


Cubby ")


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