  Romance/Love
This week: Love: The Ego Booster Edited by: shaara
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Welcome to the kingdom of the heart:
The Romance & Love Newsletter
Today I get to be your guest editor again.
Yeahhhhh!
Although I love to write science fiction and fantasy, I have to admit, I can't write a novel - even about aliens -- without planting a bit of LOVE.
I'm not sure that anyone can, although I know some try.
(But I don't read those books. LOL)
I find romance vital to my interest in a book's story.
After all, even Harry Potter felt its twinges;
Spock, of Star Trek fame, was conceived in it;
and even most fictional vampires fall in love.
Doesn't that prove that LOVE. is essential?
LOVE.
is the creeping vine that curls about and invades even the most logically sane existences.
Humanity can't seem to live without it.
It rocks our boats, our carriages, our super-powered whatever.
Which just goes to show that
throughout all history
and
well into the future.
LOVE.
will forever sneak itself into every beating heart.
And one more thought to make you go "ah."
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A quote from e.e.cummings:
"Lovers alone wear sunlight."
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Romance: the Ego Booster
According to ee.cummings, "We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us is something valuable, something worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit."
I've been thinking about the first part of that quote - a lot.
I always thought that children were born egoists and eventually learned that they weren't the center of everything. I think we call that growing up.
But what if children - what if all of us - have to have someone first to pump up that ego before we can believe in ourselves? And what if some of us never get enough of that warm fuzzy atmosphere -- those brownie points, those love taps, all the praise and gushers of admiration, the respect of others that we need in order to finally be able to reach out and grab all that's good in life?
Could it be that man and woman's striving to find LOVE is driven by the unconscious need to be stroked and fulfilled by another? Is the LOVE between a couple an attempt to satisfy that need? What I'm saying -- is could LOVE be the inborn craving of mankind for the epiphany of self-worth? Could a person who doesn't encounter the love of another - a lover, a boyfriend, or a spouse ever attain the confidence of which ee.cummings speaks?
And if that is so, can such knowledge and understanding help us to see, as writers, what it is that opens the door of the heart?
Self-worth, the stroking of the ID, the peeling away of all those layers of "I'm not good enough to be loved -- is that what we have to SHOW to our readers?
Imagine a woman - let's make that a young woman, one not yet embittered by her failure to achieve success in the love cycle -- this young woman is filled with low self esteem. She stumbles through life. She trips over failures. The very heart of her -- her courage, her strength of will -- flickers and wanes with her hopes of achieving romance.
And then one day, it happens. Someone sees. They see beyond and inside. They see the goodness shining within her.
LOVE
The psychiatrist, Scott Peck tells us: "True love is about the extending of one's ego boundaries to include another, and about the spiritual nurturing of another."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Peck
So what does Peck's words ( and ee.cummings') mean for us authors?
In my opinion, it tells us to fuel our words with specks of shattered egos, the gasping flames of need, and the crescendos of delight when the revelation arrives -- I'm loved. I'm lovable. I'm worthy; in other words, the blossoming of self-worth.
Thus, If we're going to write a romance, then we have to SHOW how the relationship develops through this sharing of beliefs and identity - this discovery of value.
I think I should stop at this point and attempt to prevent the attacks I predict will flow from my musings. People might say I am writing from the image of a fifties' woman (Leave it to Beaver's mom, if you will.) These critics would probably protest that today's woman doesn't need a man to bolster her ego,
Doesn't she? Doesn't he?
Isn't the fact that someone loves and is loved the ultimate prize -- even in today's world?
I'm not talking about the kind of relationship a couple has. I'm not considering whether one is dominant and one submissive. I'm simply describing the inflow/outflow of a couple -- the sharing, the communion, the confidence that comes from that relationship of LOVE.
Perhaps, I'm wrong.
I shall look forward to the attacks, the dispute, or the comments that arise from my monologue. I hope you jot down those thoughts.
I'm curiously still pondering, analyzing, and exploring what it is that turns a romance into a novel of depth. How do those shy, lonesome paragraphs engorge themselves to become the teary-eyed bliss of
LOVE?
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Featured Items for
the November 3rd Romance Newsletter
The first of my choices for today is the following lovely potential for romance. It is a bittersweet piece that shows all the elements of that mysterious bond which can blossom or fade when ignored.
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"Don't worry. I'm hiding away in here. Like you," his unknown companion replied. The voice was soft, melodic and female, far younger than the majority of the people Michael had seen tonight. Through the dim light of the room's only window he could make out her shape now; a shadowy figure, sitting at the other side of the room on a low stool. Try as he might, in the darkness he could make out no other details. However, he felt strangely calm in the company of this stranger. Perhaps because she was like him, hiding out in here, he had no problems relating to her, even if he did not know her face or name.
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Another tale about a love that fluttered and flew off. How sad, yet how beautiful. To touch another human, to get tclose, to dive into love . . .
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We ended up halfway down the beach before we could stop. It took minutes to get our breath back, so we walked slowly down to the water. At this point she turned to me and said, "I hate people with white feet. I always look at feet and if they are white I don't want to know the person."
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This is a beautiful piece that grabs the reader and carries them into the wonder of love.
Two weeks passed. Marie arrived home from work to find Trina sitting in the living room. "Trina, I didn't expect you until day after tomorrow, when you get your dress." Spotting the tear tracks on the young woman's cheeks, she asked, "Something's wrong, isn't it?" She opened her arms.
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What if the pathways of love lay shimmering in the air about us, and we can choose to follow them or not. This tale has an interesting premise. It's quite intriguing.
I think his name is Diego. We used to go deep-sea fishing together in the sunny golden days of long ago. Bonitas were jumping out of the ocean, Diego was murmuring "Te quiero" in Spanish, this best language for passion and love.
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Want to read the real story of LOVE? Here it is, but bring a hankie!
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Betty's eyes grew wide, tears streaming down her face. "I love you so much, George Wheaton. Of course I'll marry you!" She and George embraced, and when George closed his eyes, the world shifted.
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It isn't easy deciding if love is real . . .
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My father would have said, "If you have to do all this thinking, you don't love him enough."
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Have an opinion on what you've read here today? Then send the Editor feedback! Find an item that you think would be perfect for showcasing here? Submit it for consideration in the newsletter!
https://www.Writing.Com/go/nl_form
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Comments from the October 6, 2010 Romance Newsletter
ambrosia
This is my favorite newsletter so far! I loved the idea of putting the meanings of flowers. In short this was very lovely and creative. Good job you have my thumbs up :D ^__^
Thank you so much. I am delighted you enjoyed my last issue. May you soon receive the bouquet of your flavor from the one you most love!
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Cynaemon 
She writes: A nice little unsyrupy sweet little love poem for you. LOL
I found the poem to be a delight: It is so vivid in imagery.
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Briar Rose 
My favorite bouquet ever was a jumble of Queen Anne's lace, clover and field daisies clutched in the chubby fist of my four-year-old. He picked them and carefully brought them home just for his mom. He's a whole lot bigger now but just as sweet.
I know just what you mean. The flowers my second graders bring me are sometimes wilted and sometimes no more than weeds, but they're sweet. I have a special vase for these cute little tributes so that their hand clenched clover flowers and dandelions can decorate my desk.
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mARi☠StressedAtWork
Very interesting Newsletter. I just came up with something during English class (I was bored)... a future-contest... which will have lots of colors with meanings. This was great insight and addition to some of my ideas, thanks.
~mARi~
P.S.
I'm not really a big fan of Roses... but ever since I received a bouquet of assorted roses during my 15th birthday... I fell in love with ORANGE (sort of yellowish-orange) Roses!!
See what I mean? Orange roses - the kind that blend with a bit of gold, a bit of rose, and that lovely shade of tangerine - bliss!
Thanks for writing and good luck to you with your contest. It sounds delightful!
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Please write this month and let me know. Do you agree or disagree with ee.cummings' quote: "We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us is something valuable, something worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit."
And thus, does love provide this necessary spark?
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Romance/Love: November 03, 2010 Issue [#4049]
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