 Short Stories: September 05, 2012 Issue [#5241] |
  Short Stories
This week: Short Stories - A Battle of Words Edited by: Kate - Writing & Reading  
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"If you catch an adjective, kill it."
Mark Twain
"I believe the road to hell is paved with adverbs."
Stephen King
Greetings, I'm honored to be your host for this week's edition of the WDC Short Story Newsletter.
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Greetings, fellow scribes.
Let me open by verily offering felicitations to my own self and each of you on the natal anniversary of this very lively community.
What did I just say? How many times did you have to read through the gobbledygookp (an actual form of writing or manner of speech; jargon favored by politicians) before you got the meaning? Did you have to look up any of the words? Did you find them archaic, cliche?
I'm sure you've answered 'yes' to at least one of the above questions.
Many words and phrases rarely add anything to a sentence. Words like quite, very, extremely, essentially, totally, completely, at the present moment. Think about it, is a blanket of white snow more vivid than a blanket of snow? But if we slip in yellow snow, that is a defining image(e:rolleyes)
Read your words aloud and listen to how they describe the action your mind's eye sees when writing them. Do you see Jack running swiftly, or walking softly? Running slowly would be jogging or speedwalking perhaps? If he walks softly, he tiptoes? Is not a tower by its nature 'tall'?
Check in particular for adverbs and adjectives and look for a stronger, more vivid noun or verb instead. Adverbs add to verbs; adjectives add to nouns.
 If a verb is strong it does not need help.
If a noun is strong, it does not need help.
This is where our wordsmithing - the craft of writing - shows.
Is not a very light wind a breeze?
Is not a very strong wind a cyclone?
Most verbs do not need adverbs to help them. They often distract from the immediacy of the moment, and take the reader out of the story. Is are unnecessary. You will clutter your sentence and annoy the reader if you choose a verb that has a specific meaning and then add an adverb that carries the same meaning. Don't tell us that the radio blared loudly - "blare" connotes loudness. Don't write that someone clenched his teeth tightly - there's no other way to clench teeth. Strong verbs are weakened by redundant adverbs.
Adjectives are also often redundant. Is a mountain slightly massive? Then why say it's very massive. Can someone be slightly flabbergasted? Then why say very flabbergasted? Does a losing sprinter mope happily? Then why say he moped sadly while his enemy grinned widely? Does someone unsuccessfully obtain support? Then why say he successfully obtained support?
While adjectives and adverbs have their uses, most can be eliminated to keep the reader in the story. Stronger, more vivid verbs and nouns make the story vivid and active for the reader, drawing them into the action and emotion of the story.
I did a word search for 'ly' in a short story and was surprised to many which added no verve to the story. A few changes made the story more vivid, and I had fun wordsmithing.
Give it a try, read aloud your story and picture the action, then show that with vivid, vibrant nouns and verbs. Leave most of the ad-verbs and ad-jectives on the cutting room floor and your story will pop, compelling your reader to want to read on. (Now, eliminate 'want to' and you will be 'compelling your reader to read on'. 
I hope you've enjoyed this exploration and found something to challenge or incite your muse creative to action.
By the way, what I meant to say in opening the exploration, in case you still don't get it or, more likely, got bored trying, is:
{{c:green}center}"Happy Birthday, WDC!"
Write On
Kate
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Check out a few short stories penned for your reading pleasure by members of our Community ~ perhaps engage in some dynamic interaction (comment/review perchance and join the party and share one of your own
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I thank you for welcoming me into your virtual home this special week. As a guest host, I don't have a formal 'ask and answer' so I invite you to join the party and celebrate this special twelfth birthday at ~
Until we next meet, may your story pop as you each ~
Write On!
Kate
Kate - Writing & Reading
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