  Spiritual
This week: The Boogeyman in the Closet Edited by: Shannon  
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Welcome to the Spiritual Newsletter. I am Shannon and I'm your editor this week. |
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"So here's the movie that scared me the most in the last 12 or 13 years: The movie opens with a woman in late middle age, sitting at a table and writing a story, and the story goes something like, 'Then the branches creaked in the ...' and she stops and she says to her husband, 'What are those things? I can't think of them. They're in the backyard and they're very tall and birds land on the branches.' And he says, 'Why, Iris, those are trees,' and she says, 'Yes, how silly of me,' and she writes the word and the movie starts. And that's Iris Murdoch and she's suffering the onset of Alzheimer's disease. That's the boogeyman in the closet now. I'm afraid of losing my mind." ~ Stephen King
Funny how the things that scare you change over the years, isn't it? As children we fear the dark, monsters in our closets, and unspeakable horrors lurking beneath our beds. As we age we fear more tangible threats, and as our friends and loved ones die from disease or unforeseeable accident, the foreboding becomes palpable.
My paternal grandmother died of breast cancer, but what really took her away from us was Alzheimer's. In 2002 I was able to fly to Alaska to visit her in the nursing home. I hadn't seen her in 16 years, and by all accounts her time was short (she passed away in early 2003). My husband, my brother, my sister-in-law, and I were told upon entering the room that she wouldn't recognize us. "She's in the final stages of the disease," the nurse said. "She doesn't even recognize her husband anymore."
My grandmother had always been a large woman, and I didn't recognize the wasted, obtunded stranger hidden beneath layers of brightly-colored afghans. Everyone else seemed afraid to approach her, but I sat on the edge of her bed and said, "Hi, Grandma." She looked at me. There was no recognition in her eyes, but I spoke to her anyway. "It's me, Shannon. Sean's here too, and his wife, Sheila. I also brought my husband, Del. Do you remember me telling you about him?" I didn't get a response, but I wasn't deterred. I told her where we'd been and what we'd done. "We went fishing yesterday and caught some decent-sized humpies. We didn't keep them, though. We were holding out for the kings that never came." Suddenly it was as if the clouds parted. I could actually see it in her eyes. She said, "Shannon? Is that you?" I hugged her then, and everyone started crying when she said, "I never thought I'd have you in my arms again."
Stephen King's right. Alzheimer's is scary stuff, and I, too, worry about losing my mind. Alzheimer's is the 6th leading cause of death in the United States. It is estimated that 5 million Americans suffer from it and that 1 in 3 elderly persons will die with Alzheimer's or some other form of dementia. It is a cruel and indiscriminate harpy that devours everything in its path. Victims lose their memories, their identities, and ultimately their lives. It is degradation in stages, and it's difficult to watch. As the disease progresses sufferers are unaware of what's happening. Loved ones are helpless as they witness the decline and experience the heartbreaking loss.
It wasn't easy seeing my grandma that way, but I'm glad I did. I told her that some of my most precious childhood memories include time spent with her. I was able to look into her eyes, talk to her, hear her voice, hold her tight, and tell her I love her one last time. She died a few months later, and I will always be grateful for our time together. It was a gift--a gift that taught me the importance of expressing how you feel while you still can.
Grandma taught me many things. Her faith in God influences me still, and her creativity rubbed off on me, changing my life forever. But I'm most thankful to her for showing me what unconditional love looks like. She was always happy to see me, and she always made visiting her fun. I can only hope my grandchildren will cherish their time spent with me as I do time spent with her. Thank you, Grandma, for giving me something to aspire to.
Thank you for reading.
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I hope you enjoy this week's featured selections. Please do the authors the courtesy of reviewing the ones you read. Thank you, and have a great week!
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What is the cost of true love? How far would you go to protect it?
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The following is in response to "Spiritual Newsletter (May 15, 2013)" :
shepherd46 says, "I loved "A Wink and a Smile" and I agree that you have to stand up for yourself and that bullies "thrive" on weakness. They are relying on others to submit to their needs and when that doesn't happen, they melt. Wonderful article!" Thank you so much, Toni! I'm glad you liked it. 
ChrisDaltro-Chasing Moonbeams  says, "Thank you for featuring my story What Goes Around Comes Around in your May 2013 Spiritual Newsletter! I was so proud!" You are most welcome, Christina. It was my pleasure, as always. 
Zeke says, "If you never let a person bully you, you probably would never have to resort to a dramatic confrontation." Of course that's true. Everyone has their breaking point, and defending yourself does get easier with time and practice. 
Quick-Quill  says, "This was a story stopper. I have to think what is my MC like? Is he a bully? What has his past molded him to be. If he is fanatical in his beliefs, does this translate to a hardcore husband? What are his limits? Does he believe in corporal punishment of his wife and children? Hmm, I need to think this out. What happens when someone confronts him with just as much fanaticism on the opposite side? I don't know. HELP!" It's GREAT that you've taken this into consideration when molding your characters! I find a character profile sheet really helps to flesh out story people. Have you ever used one? I can send you the one I use if you'd like. Just email me. I'm glad you found the NL useful. Thank you for reading! 
ember_rain says, "Good for you! We all have to find our voices sometimes. Just remember sometimes the best type of confrontation is no confrontation at all. I was bullied. I took my mother's advice and ignored them. I was miserable but they were so focused on me they forgot there were others to bully. While they were forgetting the people the used to bully were plotting. I took the brunt of it but in the end, the others found a way to stop the bulling in that school forever. It was an awesome moment when two years after we moved, I ran into someone from there who asked if I knew how hard it was to fill my shoes. To me, I didn't do anything. To them, I did everything. MLK was right about a lot of things." Yes. It all goes back to that "turn the other cheek" stuff. You are to be commended for your courage. I guess it's just not in my nature to lay down and take it. I tried, but it didn't work out so well. 
bamid2 says, "i BELIEVE EDITOR DID A GREAT JOB- He developed a personality from allowing others to walk all over him and bully him to becoming self motivated and not letting others to treat him badly. He showed in here that by changing his decision he was able to change his personality and become self determined. The author chose a great subject and did a great job developing the story and showing how one can get rid of his problems and develop himself." Thank you, Benny! 
Christine Cassello says, "I was like you holding back my emotions, except when I argued with my father and that was useless. He always managed to be right. My anger was pointed out to me at a Christian camp but I still didn't believe that I had that problem. When I got a part time job working a fitting room in an off-price clothing store and the people that took advantage of me, not coming to relieve me for breaks and lunch on time and expecting me to work harder than they were working,and not responding to suggestions I made, or giving me help I requested I snapped one day. As I was checking the fitting room stalls I slammed the doors. It felt good." Good for you! Although I'm proud that I stood up for myself that day, sometimes when I think about it I'm overcome with guilt. It seems my upbringing has deep, tortuous roots.  Thank you for reading and commenting!
Mark Allen Mc Lemore says, "My hate for confrontation combined with the fact nobody ever listened to me made me into the writer I am today." Exactly! Your comment reminds me of something I heard on the radio a few years ago. I was listening to a radio show about how so many Americans (something like 60% or more) are being medicated for depression. One of the doctors on the show said, "If we're all walking around in a medicinal haze, who's going to write all the love songs? Antidepressants don't just buffer the quote-unquote 'bad' stuff, they buffer the good stuff, too." That really stuck with me. Emotions, good and "bad," are part of life and they spark creativity. Thank you for reading! 
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Spiritual: June 12, 2013 Issue [#5717]
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