  Action/Adventure
This week: And ... ACTION! Edited by: Annette  
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And ... ACTION!
Develop that character or push the reader in head first?
When writing action adventure, what is the best way to start the first page? All up in the action with flames roaring, water rising, or wind howling from free falling? Or in a quiet place, setting the stage for what is to come?
Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. They were the last people you'd expect to be involved in anything strange or mysterious, because they just didn't hold with such nonsense.
J. K. Rowling "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone." 1997
The trawler plunged into the angry swells of the dark, furious sea like an awkward animal trying desperately to break out of an impenetrable swamp. The waves rose to goliathan heights; crashing into the hull with the power of raw tonnage; the white sprays caught in the sky cascaded downward over the deck under the force of the night wind.
Robert Ludlum "The Bourne Identity" 1980
In the first excerpt, we meet a couple with a boring name, in a boring suburb, who want nothing to have to do with anything out of the ordinary at all. For those who have read the Harry Potter books, seen the movies, or at least heard something about that story: you know there is going to be plenty of action in that story although it does not seem like it at first. Yes, there is the hint at all of that boring stuff is about to change. Why else was it mentioned that they don't want to deal with strange or mysterious things? And one more thing. The couple in the first sentence aren't even the main characters. They, as a matter of fact, only play a marginal role as evil step-parents to the hero. Other than that, they spend their time in the book being mostly pathetic. Still, they got the first sentence. Of a book full of action, adventure, peril, and death.
In the second excerpt, we don't meet anybody in the first two sentences. What we get is nature at it's worst. Obviously we are out on the ocean and the waves are crashing down on a trawler, not too big of a boat. Anybody who's seen a storm over the ocean knows immediately that this situation is serious. Whoever is on that boat better be tied up or under deck with a life vest on ... or else. But there is nobody in those sentences at peril. We don't know anybody on that boat or why we should care about them. Still, there is undeniably more action, peril, and possibly death in those two sentences.
When writing action adventure, the first sentence does not necessarily make or break the story, but there has to be a hook that keeps the reader go down the page. In Harry Potter, I think it was the insistence of the Dursley's that they don't want to be involved. A surefire hint at loads of trouble heading their way. In the Bourne Indentity, I'd say we better soon start seeing somebody. Because if that boat is on the ocean without a soul on board, then I don't care.
Neither of the books has the book's hero in the first two sentences. Both books were wildly popular and have been made into movies. Remember that next time somebody tells you your story has a weak beginning. Does it really? Or are you just using a few words to set the stage?
For my next Action/Adventure newsletter, send me the first two sentences of one of your stories or books through the submission tool below. I will give you my opinion on them. Do not send more than the first two sentences. Let's see how they feel. You can attach the item ID number to your submission if you want to.
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Comments I got for my last Action Adventure Newsletter "Culture Shock"
Joshiahis  wrote: You're NL this week introduced the meanness of today's society. To me, when I see comments like the ones you described, it just sounds like a bunch of people searching for something to whine about. Now let me share something from the opposite perspective. I'm a minority, speculative fiction writer and I cringe when I see websites or e-zines devoted to minority or LGBT writers because they expect your characters to match your ethnicity or sexual preference. My spider senses start tingling. Why make a community dedicated to certain people only to pigeonhole their creativity?
I can see what you mean. I have a lesbian friend who once lived in a commune of all lesbians. The other women were angry at her that her female dog was attracted to male dogs. You can't make stuff like this up. Being narrow minded happens in all parts of society - even among those who you'd think would be tolerant toward others because they need tolerance for deviating from some imposed norm. While my example has nothing to do with fiction, it has something to do with forcing every living creature into the same mold whether it's appropriate or not.
writetight wrote: Your newsletter concerning heroes and stereotypes brought to mind the experience I had when writing for "confession" magazines. Having already sold several stories to the "white" section of the market I was contacted by the lady in charge of the "black" market, requesting a submission. Happy to oblige, I whipped out a story featuring Black characters and sent it to her. A few days later she called me with a few instructions. The dialogue needed to be more Black, and the love scene(s) needed to be "hotter" than those allowed in the white magazines. She also advised me to "lose" the one white character I included in the story. Although this struck me as a bit racist, I did a re-write and resubmitted. She accepted it, and I went on to supply her with a dozen more stories.
Lesson learned: Write for your market!
That's ... well ... racism is alive and well on both sides of the aisle. Judging from the comment above and yours here, people don't want tolerance. I find that sad, but not surprising.
BIG BAD WOLF Feeling Thankful  wrote: Some heroes aren't what you expect. "Zena's Profile"
Yours never are.
A*Monaing*Faith  wrote: "stereo type of the male (usually white) hero?"
Holy-moley as a black female writer this is something I think about CONSTANTLY!!! Would Harry Potter, Twilight, or Katniss Everdeen been nearly as popular if the main characters were black!? hate to say it but I think not; it knots my tummy now every time I read a character description that uses the term 'black' because it makes me realize that none of the other characters are called 'white' MAYBE they are 'fair-skinned' to note pallor or something; I also annoy myself when I find myself just accepting and assuming that most characters are white by default; it's a huge wonder/problem for/with me, so glad you're talking about it :D "Reflections: A Collection"
I never thought about that - but you are right. I also always think of characters as white by default until I am told differently. I am also guilty of writing like that. My white characters get less description than Asians, Latinos, or black characters because I am conditioned to assume that they are white. Wow! Mind blown!
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Action/Adventure: January 01, 2014 Issue [#6074]
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