Action/Adventure: September 10, 2014 Issue [#6542] |
Action/Adventure
This week: Why the Horses Aren't Still Screaming Edited by: Storm Machine More Newsletters By This Editor
1. About this Newsletter 2. A Word from our Sponsor 3. Letter from the Editor 4. Editor's Picks 5. A Word from Writing.Com 6. Ask & Answer 7. Removal instructions
One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from a horse master. He told me to go slow to go fast. I think that applies to everything in life. We live as though there aren't enough hours in the day but if we do each thing calmly and carefully we will get it done quicker and with much less stress. ~Viggo Mortensen |
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A friend of mine went through a critique where his battle scene had the hero on horse to face down some foes. They met on a trail and the horses screamed... And screamed... And never ran away, but kept screaming while the fighting continued.
I suppose that might serve as a lesson to us to pay attention to real animals. Horses may scream, but they wouldn't stay during the fighting. A scream from a horse is generally going to be attached to a running horse, which would leave all the fighters alone in the middle of a trail.
A few of the horses might be disciplined and trained for war. These horses might not scream and would probably be counted on to fight back. That might need to be fleshed out in the narrative before this battle that we know that Blaze the horse isn't going to run when the swords are flying at his face.
This will follow for any animal that is caught in the crossfire. Training will take them so far, but an untrained animal will run. Even rabbits will scream in times of need.
Be sure that the only animals you see aren't just on TV or in the zoo to write them as true as they can be. Disney brings animals into the studio for the animators to get good looks at how they move. If only the rest of us could be so lucky!
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| | Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1906176 by Not Available. |
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| | Kingdomnation (13+) A book, a story, a journey, about unwanted responsibility, love, and change. #1986306 by a.w |
| | Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1875969 by Not Available. |
Now and then I see pieces like these, and I hope one of you can help:
| | Repentance (E) Can Akai, the wolf god, stop himself from destroying all the things most dear to him? #1645314 by Minuit |
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Quick-Quill
I like your NL. I think beginning readers do get carried away with description. Take Shrek, when he and the princess are walking. We see the scenery in the background, but he blows up a frog and a snake, catches flies in a spider web on a stick. All part of the journey but it made it interesting until the bandits showed up. Add action to the journey then some conflict. Keeps the reader reading not putting the book down.
Exactly!
monty31802
Try to get the Hero running ,is that the idea? A fine News Letter.
Thanks. Better than just smelling the roses.
BIG BAD WOLF is Howling
Life is a journey.
Definitely.
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