 Poetry: October 19, 2005 Issue [#668] |
  Poetry
This week: Edited by: John~Ashen  
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Poetry! It comes in all styles and meanings. Some poems express personal feelings; others demonstrate a particular pattern. Most of us write some combination in between. I'll be offering advice on different styles and pointing out techniques to improve your poems. Enjoy  --John~Ashen |
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Building with Concrete
Today's lesson: use concrete images instead of abstractions in your poems.
When we create poems, we are trying to convey messages. Usually, the messages are abstract; that is, not specific. "I miss you" and "love is wonderful" are two common themes. Yet these phrases make for very boring reading outside of the Hallmark isle in your bookstore.
When we go to write poems, we should translate these abstract themes into concrete terms. That is, you should get specific. "My heart is a rotting tomato without you" and "I feel like I can soar with doves" are concrete translations of last paragraph's phrases.
You want specifics so that images form in the reader's head. This lets them follow the story in their minds as your poem progresses. If you stay abstract, their understanding of what you're saying will either be fuzzy or unimpressed. Fuzzy: "Huh? You lost me between Ultimate Happiness and the Darkness." Unimpressed: "Yeah, I know break-ups hurt, so what?"
How do you know when you're being abstract? A good rule of thumb is that abstractions can't be sensed directly.
I have earned my freedom.
What will make you happy?
Come up with something good.
"Freedom" is a concept. "Happy" is a feeling. "Good" -- well, we all disagree on what is and is not. You can deliver these messages with more creative, specific wording.
My soul sprouted wings.
What will make you dance the macarena?
Come up with something toe-curling.
In a more popular example, Robert Frost didn't write about the fragility of young love; he wrote about leaves changing colors. He didn't comment directly on making life decisions; he wrote about a path in the woods.
I always ask, when I've written a poem, what the painting would look like if someone painted it. Did I give them enough elements to create a scene? The story factor makes your message more distinct and memorable. I could write more examples here, but honestly I'm tired of typing. If you need ideas on how to replace your styrofoam with something more concrete, shoot me an email with the item link. - John~Ashen |
Ask yourself which parts are nicely articulated and what parts, if any, could suffer some refinements:
An extensive resource for poets:
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