 Spiritual: April 29, 2015 Issue [#6957] |
  Spiritual
This week: Who Are Your Heroes? Edited by: Sophurky  
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Hi, I'm Sophurky ~ your editor for this edition of the Spiritual Newsletter.
The Rev. Scotty McLennan, author of the book Finding Your Religion, compares humanity's innate need for spiritual searching to climbing a mountain. In his view, we are all endeavoring to climb the same figurative mountain in our search for the divine, we just may take different ways to get there. In other words, there is one "God," but many paths. I honor whatever path or paths you have chosen to climb that mountain in your quest for the Sacred.  |
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Who Are Your Heroes?
We shape our personalities in part by making comparisons with those we admire; by emulating those we estimate have something worthwhile in their character. And what are heroes if not those whom we aspire to be like? Who are the people who’ve set examples to help you carry on in difficult circumstances? Who are the people who’ve invested themselves in a way that inspired you to realize your own potential? Who are your heroes?
As I considered my own answer to the question, it was easier when I gave myself permission to cherry pick good qualities from a variety of role models rather than limiting myself to the good example just one person. There are many people I admire and appreciate for different reasons, and I’ve lived long enough to understand that none of them are perfect. So rather than approaching this as an exercise in setting anyone up on a pedestal from which she or he would be inevitably destined to fall, I’m inclined to collect contributions a la carte from anyone who has made a good impression on me at some point in time.
Here’s an example – while watching a golf tournament recently, I heard a story about Phil Mickelson, one of my favorite golfers. Part of what I like about Phil has to do with his approach to the game. He often takes chances – trying difficult shots that many players would not risk. His nickname on tour is “Phil the thrill.” But even more impressive to me is the way he conducts himself with the crowds who attend the tournaments in which he plays. Phil is deliberately generous with his attention, regularly taking time to share fist bumps and high fives as he makes his way along the course, and stopping to sign autographs and visit with fans after the round is over. This made all the more of an impression when I heard a story about Phil recently while watching a tournament on television.
Early in his career Phil was playing a tournament in which Arnold Palmer was playing, as well. The tournament was in the middle of summer, and the weather was quite hot and humid making conditions fairly miserable for the players and galleries alike. The announcer recounting the story had been a player himself at the time, and he recalled how all of the players were feeling exhausted and irritable, and looking forward to getting back into the air-conditioned clubhouse to shower and change clothes. After his round, Phil was making his way back to the clubhouse and noticed Arnold Palmer taking the time to visit a tent dedicated to providing refreshments for the volunteers who helped with menial tasks involved in running the tournament, such as directing traffic and so forth. Many of these volunteers wood likely never see a single shot or encounter even one player during the event depending on their assignments. Arnold took the time to shake hands and visit with literally every volunteer in the tent, spending well over an hour in the heat after his round was over for the afternoon. The uncomfortable weather notwithstanding, Arnold was friendly, gregarious, and generous with his time. As he watched, Phil was impressed and said to his playing partner for the day, “I want to be that guy!” Ever since, Phil has made a point of socializing with the galleries and volunteers in the tournaments he plays. No matter how well he is or isn’t playing that day, he almost always finds time to visit and shake hands and sign autographs for his fans.
When you are as talented and successful as someone like Arnold Palmer or Phil Michelson, you don’t have to do that. Top-level athletes, musicians, super models and other celebrities get plenty of attention just for the sake of their success. But there’s an adage – “The real test of your character is how you treat the people you don’t have to be nice to.” Phil is one of those who uses his celebrity as a commodity with which to be kind and generous. I aspire to be like that (minus the celebrity part, lol).
Who are your heroes? I asked myself that question and, again, I found it easier to come up with answers when I gave myself permission to look among the masses as well as to over-achievers. Here’s a story about someone I’ll almost certainly never meet – I might never even hear of him again outside of this story, yet this person set an example I’d surely be proud to emulate. The following is reprinted from an article in The Huffington Post…
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/24/gay-best-friend-promposal-anthony-marti...
This Straight Guy Just Asked His Gay BFF To Prom With The Most Adorable Promposal
As a student council member at his high school, Anthony Martinez is often tasked with planning school dances. But the 17-year-old, who is gay, says that he “never [gets] asked.” Until now, that is. Martinez, who attends Desert Oasis High School in Las Vegas, Nevada, shared on Twitter this week that he was asked to prom by someone entirely unexpected. It was his best friend, Jacob Lescenski — who is straight. For the promposal, Lescenski created a banner with the words: “You’re hella gay, I’m hella str8. But you’re like my brother. So be my d8?”
Lescenski told New Now Next that he had decided to surprise Martinez with the “promposal” after seeing his friend tweet about wanting a date for the event.
“I decided on going to prom alone because my original date idea didn’t work out so well,” he said. “Then one night I saw Anthony, who is my best friend, tweeting about wanting a date. So, I came up with the poster idea, asked my friend Mia to make it and asked him that next day … It was a giant surprise to everyone, especially Anthony!” A thrilled Martinez expressed his gratitude to his BFF on social media.
“He’s my best friend, and a real man given the fact he has the guts to fulfill my gay student council dream of always helping out planning dances, and never getting asked. I couldn’t ask for a better person in my life,” the teen wrote on Tumblr. “Thank you Jacob, can’t wait for May 2nd!” Lescenski’s promposal has gone viral this week, and netizens everywhere have praised the teen for his awesome gesture of friendship. “It’s an adorable story — boy meets boy — with a 2015 twist,” wrote Mic.com of the promposal. “As being an ally becomes more and more a part of the high school experience, it’s inspiring to see a pair of bros taking the hetero-homo friendship to new heights.”
Each of us has our own criteria for selecting heroes. Maybe heroes are a little like good clothes – they suit us better when we tailor them to our own particular needs rather than buying them off the rack. I don’t suppose Jacob Lescenski will or even should be a hero for everyone. In one sense, he was considerate and offered a creative act of friendship, and for some that’s as far as it needs to go. But I know how much the affirmation and support of a gesture like this can mean. It’s easy to overlook the power a gesture like this can have to inspire others to similar acts of kindness and generosity. So when I read about something like what Jacob Lescenski did, it occurs to me to say, “I want to be like him!”
Who are your heroes? Who are the people who’ve set examples to help you carry on in difficult circumstances? Who are the people who’ve invested themselves in a way that inspired you to realize your own potential?
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Here is a response to my last newsletter "Spiritual Newsletter (April 1, 2015)" about "The Illusion of Control:"
From billikus
Aww Soph, you're a regular bionic woman now. God Bless and keep you, and may your knees last forever.
Thank you Billy!
     
From bonzo1964
Your post caught my eye and I just want to say thank you! I've been down in the dumps because of my arthritis pain and the inability to control it better! I have a house that needs attention and as the chief cook and bottle washer, I feel I am rarely out of the kitchen! I have so much to do and I was just feeling frustrated. I too need to give up on controlling things. I've always been an independent person and this pain is no joke! So, thank you for posting about control, because the older I get, the less control I have and it is a huge issue for me! Thanks again and I'll keep reading this till it sinks in!!! Much Love, Daddy's Girl (Bonnie)
Blessings to you - I hope your pain eases!
From ANN Counselor, Lesbian & Happy 
Sophie: This was wonderful. I learned the importance of 'letting go' during counseling and found peace with the bad things that had happened to the child-me only by 'letting go' which is not 'giving up' for 'letting go' brings power into our lives and hearts; Since then being like the fish, taking things as they happened, correcting what I can correct; otherwise 'let go and let God', whomever God is to each heart. Thank you for sharing the words about Islam because we who call ourselves 'Christians' must open our hearts to believers in Islam for we all seek the same Creator who chose to create us and all that is; and to our amazement, when we 'let go and let the Creator' life is so much better in every way. This message to all of us is a Keeper that will stay in my email so I can read it again when I try to 'hold on' instead of 'letting go'.
ANN
Thank you so much for sharing!
From Quick-Quill 
Unlike the fish who has no choice, only instinct to guide it, we must make choices daily. I look at it more like a teacher who guided my hand while I learn to write. Practicing to make straight letters takes time and patience. Having a hand to guide me to make those letters straighter is a choice. I can choose to make them on my own and struggle to eventually have control over the pencil and they may look good or when compared to others look pretty bad. Its my choice to ask or refuse help. We all have a choice how our penmanship appears to others. Can they read it easily or is it such a mess they give up? The choice is yours, the master is there to help when asked.
Thank you for sharing your perspective, it is much appreciated.
From Lazy Writer est 4/24/2008 
Hi Sophie,
Control - what a topic for me to read today! Control - is something that I struggle with on a daily basis practically. We never have control over any of our circumstances - even though we think we do - I am learning - I believe in God - and I believe He alone is in control. We need to daily turn our will for control over to His control - life won't be perfect - but He can handle things so much better!
Keep Writing
Lazy Writer
Thanks so much!
From mykel
Dear Sophie,
Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts in “The Illusion of Control.” There were a number of things you said that resonated with me. I don’t usually comment in or on these newsletters, but I have been noticing, more and more, the notice at the bottom, saying, “Don’t be shy. Write into this newsletter.”
I appreciate your comment at the beginning of the newsletter: “In other words, there is one "God," but many paths. I honor whatever path or paths you have chosen to climb that mountain in your quest for the Sacred.” I am not a believer in Abrahamic religions, and I can easily feel uncomfortable when the religious terms and dogmas start flying. I do enjoy reading and using religious language as a tool of communication and mutual understanding. When the language is a means to hear and speak with the hearts of others, I’m on board.
As you mentioned, impermanence is at the core of Eastern beliefs. In Buddhism, it is called one of the Three Seals of the Dharma: suffering, impermanence, and no separate self. These are considered to be elements of existence, the threads that make up the warp and woof of our experience. In simple words, they mean, “Life is stressful; things are constantly changing; don’t take it personally.” Your comments about impermanence are to the point. As we live in circumstances that are constantly changing, uncertainty is one of the common themes. It’s no small wonder that we become angry and frustrated since we try to hold on to things that can’t be held onto. Yet, we are still responsible for all that we think, say, and do, and it is our vocation to navigate the turbulent waters of birth and death. As you say, non-attachment is the means to finding peace and contentment.
One of the things you said piqued my interest. You wrote, “In Judaism, letting go has to do with forgiveness. The practices of repentance and atonement allow individuals to make amends for past injuries. To forgive and to be forgiven is a way to release and be released, to let go of the past.” I have seen this in action many times and it has made a deep impression on me. I have very little experience with Judaism. Do you happen to know any authors or writings that talk about this teaching or practice in more depth? I confess that I have an aversion to pop psychology and feel-good advocates. I find it more rewarding to look into more traditional sources to mine the ore that resides there. If you have any thoughts or suggestions, I’d be most grateful to hear them.
Thank you again for your thoughts, Sophie. May you always be well and happy.
Michael
Thank you so much for your thoughtful email. You gave me much to ponder as well, and I am so glad the newsletter made such an impression, thank you for letting me know.
As books or writings occur to me about Judaism, I will pass them along.
From Elfin Dragon-finally published
There's the old saying of "Let Go and Let God". I think this is the most difficult aspect in our spiritual lives. We want to have control and it's difficult to surrender aspects of our lives. I've also gone through surgeries and you're right, letting the staff do what they do best for you that first few days/weeks is hard. Your whole life is turned upside down. But if we do just "Let Go", meditate, pray (or whatever) and "Let God" - surrender and let our spiritual lives happen - we find a greater peace.
Amen to that!
And in response to my February Newsletter - Evolving Faith:
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Please keep your comments and suggestions coming! Until next time! Sophurky |
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