 Comedy: September 23, 2015 Issue [#7226] |
  Comedy
This week: Sharing Edited by: Waltz Invictus  
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You can share in my joy, but I don’t want to share my misery. No, I want to give away my misery. Go ahead, take it all.
-Jarod Kintz
Share your knowledge. It is a way to achieve immortality.
-Dalai Lama XIV
It ain't no fun if the homies can't have none.
-Snoop Dogg |
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One of the first lessons we consciously learn in life is how sharing is good. For instance, I've shared three quotes with you there above, in the "About" section. I wanted to emphasize how I managed to put a quote by the Dalai Lama next to a quote from Snoop Dogg. I thought that was funny, so I shared. I'm awesome like that, but how would you know how awesome I was unless I shared? See how it works?
But have you ever noticed that the only people who are asked to share are the ones with something that others covet, like money, or Oreos? No one ever asks the beggar on the street corner to share his blanket - though often, the beggar on the street corner would be the first to offer his blanket.
No, there's a seedy underbelly to the whole "You should share" philosophy, which is that, ultimately, the ones who espouse this want someone to share with them. Especially churches.
Last time I went to Las Vegas, I lost money. Not a lot; I was just having fun and being entertained. But no one wanted me to share those losses with them, which was sad. The time before that, I won a bit, and everyone wanted me to share that with them, in the form of drinks and tips (usually one folded dollar at a time).
I also got very sick, that time, and shared my disease with half of California. I won't say that contributed to their drought, but it probably didn't help.
Speaking of the California drought, I recently read an article about how Canada has a water surplus. So, will they share? Or will we invade? After all, sharing will make them feel better, right?
Still, I think, the best thing to share is a laugh. Sure, you can't buy a house with one, but it can't hurt. So share already!
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Not to mention movement patterns. But I digress, I just wanted to say that I also know what it's like to find things thought lost and I'm slowly trying to organize a "hoarder's nightmare", as my mother would put it. 