 Comedy: March 01, 2006 Issue [#905] |
  Comedy
This week: Edited by: Melissa is fashionably late!  
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Life throws us curve balls, running us through a gambit of emotions. The best emotion of all is happines, and nothing envokes happiness more than laughter. There is a science to making others laugh, and it is through that science that comedy has evolved.
This topic of this week's Comedy Newsletter is Murphy's Law. |
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My son's birthday was February 28, and I decided to have his birthday party the Saturday before. I thought I had organized everything enough so that everything would go right, and I would be able to enjoy my son's birthday party as much as he did.
The whole day started off wrong. I should have known from the start that I was doomed- not for failure- but for Murphy's Law to take over my organization and plans and work it's own magic:
If anything can go wrong, it will.
I called the restaurant a month in advance to reserve a room large enough to fit a minimum of 25 people.
I ordered the cake the week of the party from the store across the street from the restaurant.
I double checked to see if I could get the balloons from the store, saving me a trip to another store prior to the party.
I planned the entire day so that I would be able to do everything I needed in the morning and my afternoon would be free.
If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.
There, you have it. The worst that could have gone wrong was the restaurant. I mean, if I didn't have the room, the party would have been a bust. To make sure that this didn't happen, I called to verify and confirm the room's reservation a few days before the party. I made sure they would have the food out at 1 pm, when the party was due to begin. I even went so far as to tell them how many high chairs and booster seats I would need so they would already be in the room and available for my guests.
If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
Nothing should have gone wrong, according to my plans. I had made sure that I had done everything that I could to ensure that the party would start and finish, without a problem. Well, I did everything I could control, anyhow.
If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which something can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.
The fifth thing happened for me. I should have seen it coming, but I didn't, because I had done everything I was supposed to.
I left the house on time. That was my first mistake. I should have left early, in case something did go wrong. I arrived at the store to pick up the cake, and went to the balloon department first (it was really the floral booth, but I didn't care about the flowers). I picked out five mylar balloons and asked her to fill them, and seven latex balloons, with helium.
Figuring it would take her time to fill the balloons, I headed back to the bakery to pick up the cake. I went to the counter, and gave them my name. The lady went to the back and looked for the cake, then came back a few moments later and said they didn't have a cake for me. I told her she had to have been mistaken and sent her back to look for a cake with my son's name on it.
After a few moments, she came back with the cake I had ordered: a Blue's Clues cake with "Happy 1st Birthday Ethan!" written on it and an additional cake that they give for baby's first birthdays for the baby to dig into on their own.
Needless to say, I was a little upset by the delay in my schedule. It wasn't until the balloon lady came back to tell me that their store was out of helium that I realized that you can never plan for others' blunders. I figured it wasn't as big of a deal, because I could have the balloons filled at the restuarant, which always gave away balloons to kids whenever I had been there.
Just as I was checking out, my mother-in-law called me on my cell phone, asking if I had reserved the small or large room at the restaurant, because they were seating everyone in the small room. That's about when I started to stress out, but I knew my mother-in-law would be able to handle the situation, so I told her to get the manager and tell her that I had reserved the large room almost a month before and that I expected to be seated in there. I also asked her to check and see if they had helium for the balloons.
As I'm walking out of the store, she called me back to let me know that they'd moved the party to the big room and that they were out of helium, too. So, I did the only thing I could to get the balloons filled. I went to the party supply store in the same strip mall and paid to have them filled.
Of course, all of this made us late, and thus made my son late to his very first birthday party. When we arrived, we had everything I had planned on having, except the food. There wasn't even a table in the room for the food, yet.
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
After being frazzled for a few minutes, a very good friend took me out and made me ask for the manager so I could get everything taken care of before I flew into a frantic frenzy. The manager was very apologetic, and fixed everything as quickly as she could.
All in all, we only ended up eating a half an hour late. That made the presents opened about 45 minutes late, and the cake was cut about 15 minutes late. The party still ended on time, though. Thankfully. I don't think my nerves could have taken anything more.
No matter how much planning you think you've done, someone, somewhere is working against you. You can plan and organize, but if you are relying out any forces outside of yourself, something can, and will, always go wrong.
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Take an ordinary situation and throw a monkey into the mix. Twist it so something odd happens, and you have yourself a story. My son's birthday could have gone 100% right, but several factors outside of my control prevented that. But it did make for a fun story, didn't it?  |
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i know exactly what you mean about time. i have to drive 20 to work then back to pick my son up from school, then back to work, and finially back home after my shift. i work 9 to 6. by the time supper and bath is done, it's past my bed time, then my hubby wants me to cook for him, and have a spotless house by the time he gets home at 1130!!! some how i manage to do it, just like you. - stephanie
Great Newsletter; made me crack out laughing which is something I don't normally do first thing in the morning. Very witty observations and oh so true.
'You don't gain time, you swap it.' Absolutely! And when your kids are grown, you swap that for looking after elderly relatives. But always, there must be time for WDC to keep us (in)sane. - scarlett_o_h
You've brightened my day, and I really loved reading this!  I admit I don't always think of those things that magically happen while I'm at school and I don't appreciate my mom at times I really should, but after what you said...I don't think I want to give it a try, though I'll try my best from now on to be a LOT less mesy. - alaina
Great job, Mel. I love to watch people muti-task. And I especially love to watch them scurry around the house trying to clean up...I can watch someone else work for hours   - billwilcox
Melissa - I love what you had to say here! Thanks for the monring laugh! - Tigger thinks of Prancer
Time's a unique resource. If there was anything else like it we'd call it time.
We talk about saving time and spending time, but it's nothing like money. If it was like money we'd all be on the same salary, but maybe with varying lengths of contract.
Time is nature's way of making sure everything doesn't happen at once. - Mavis Moog
Thanks for all of your great comments! Keep them coming!
Until next month, keep laughing!
Melissa is fashionably late! |
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