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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/newsletters/action/archives/id/9243-Giving-Thanks.html
Horror/Scary: November 28, 2018 Issue [#9243]




 This week: Giving Thanks
  Edited by: W.D.Wilcox Author IconMail Icon
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Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

My Christmas Sig from Undocked & Peck


Word from our sponsor

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Letter from the editor

Giving Thanks



Hi, my name is Yosie Yams and every year I am the favorite side dish on the Holiday Table. Kids like me because of my bright color and sweet taste. Seniors like me because I’ve already been chewed. And parents like me because I’m probably the easiest thing to fix on Thanksgiving.

With a little imagination, I could probably be a contender for dessert and give ol’ Pumpkin Pie a run for his money. But you’d have to cover me with marshmallows first.

I feel sad for some of the other side dishes though, Sticky Stuffing or Cranky Cranberry. You know, you can tell whether someone likes you by the look on their face when they eat you. Have you ever seen the look on someone’s face when they try to eat Cranberry sauce? Oh, man, it gives me the willies.

Well, food's on, and here comes the family.

Look at ‘em! This Family Tree just keeps getting bigger and bigger every year. I sure hope she cooked enough for everybody. Look, there’s Aunt Martha and Uncle Henry, Gram and Gramps, and look at all those kids.

Uh-oh, it looks like little Johnny has a bad cold, and he’s gonna sit down right next to me. Geez! Get some tissue buddy, would ya? You can’t sit down to eat with a wet snozola like that. That's disgusting, man. Somebody get Little Johnny a tissue!

Come on now, dig in to my steamy caramel-colored goodness. I bet that’ll help cure your cold. You know, your mom worked real hard this year preparing everything so that it came out just right.

Yeah, that’s it. Take a big old heaping tablespoon of me . . . .

“ACHOO!”

Oh man! That was gross! Look what you did to me! I got snot all over me. Somebody help! Help! Get it off! Get it off!

Oh! Finally! She’s taking me away to get me all cleaned up. Aw, listen to everybody moaning because I’m leaving the table. Don’t you worry none folks, I’ll be right back. I know, I know, but these things happen when you got kids, right?

I’m just gonna change my top, and, uh, hey, wait a minute. Hey! What . . . whatcha doing? You’re scraping me into the garbage can? Come on now! I’m still edible! No! No! No! Oh, what a cruel world this is. I'll get you for this, Johnny! Just you wait until next year . . . .


HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY,



A new sig from 'undocked'





Editor's Picks

Kill the Bird, Stuff 'im, and Eat 'im Whole



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The Black Cape And Top Hat Open in new Window. (13+)
A man's memory of a terrible event in his youth still haunts him
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A clown can only take so much...
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McDermott's Gift Open in new Window. (18+)
A man uses his supernatural gift to save a town.
#1059247 by W.D.Wilcox Author IconMail Icon

 
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Ask & Answer

DEAD LETTERS



gingerlyme says:
Thanks a million for featuring my short story The Right Thing To Do in your newsletter!


Kotaro Author Icon says:
Thanks for showing us how to do it. You're the best!



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#2147990 by Not Available.

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Now, Open Exclusively to HSP students & members - a 2016 & 2020 Quill Award winner
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The Writer's Cramp Open in new Window. (13+)
Write the best poem or story in 24 hours or less and win 10K GPS!
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SCREAMS!!! Open in new Window. (GC)
A Terrifying Contest Of Horror And Three Time Quill Award Winner!
#2020439 by Lilith 🎄 Christmas Cheer Author IconMail Icon

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