Fantasy
This week: Edited by: John~Ashen More Newsletters By This Editor
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Fantasy! It comes in all flavors and subgenres. In the realm of the imagination, boundaries become meaningless. I'll be pointing out different styles and offering advice on key elements of fantasy writing. Enjoy --John~Ashen |
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Information Dumping
Ever start reading a story, but you have to put it away because it just drags too much at the start? Odds are, the author tried to dump too much information on you too early. He should have made sure to keep you interested before giving you the 4-1-1 (information!). Start with a hook instead, and only then should you test the patience of your dear readers.
Let's categorize the main forms of dumping
The History Dump is a long preamble at the start of the story. The intention is to familiarize you with that world's particular history. While important to the author, this rarely interests the reader!
Example: In the beginning there were twelve Major Gods and fifteen Minor Gods. They warred with each other until only six remained. They decided to make a world fair to all, but something went wrong. High in the mountains there was a confluence of peoples fighting for the same village. This village was named for one of the fallen Minor Gods. After generations of strife...
Boring! This introduction doesn't hook the reader. There is no character to champion or crisis to resolve. If you want to interest someone with a historical fact, you need to make it snappy, like in the beginnings of movies.
Better: High in the mountains, humans fought against three other races fought for control of a lost god's city. This is their barbarous tale.
Later on you can sneak in pertinent historical facts during convenient occasions, such as an elder's rant, a teacher's lesson, or an artifact's inscription.
The Scenery Dump is when the author gets too excited about describing his world and forgets to tell the story. Most often, the particulars of that day's weather don't even factor into the plot.
Example: Nothing but the wind made noise on that cold, windy day. Dew could barely cling to leaf blades, and pollen splattered the foliage indiscriminately. A bunny hopped across a path, leaving little rabbit droppings on the packed earth. Our hero rode by, his horse sweating with every stride. Its glossy black coat glistened in the cool morning breeze...
So what -- get back to the rider already! Readers are gonna fall asleep if there is no action forthcoming. Describe scenery later, when the details help the story instead of replace it.
Better: Our hero rode down a trail, the cool morning air silently sucking the warmth from both rider and horse.
If you want the humor of the rabbit dropping, describe it only after the hero dismounts and steps in it.
The Name-Drop Dump is the too-early introduction of too many characters and placenames. This happens when the author forgets that readers might not be familiar with the cast of characters. Fanfiction is an easy genre in which to make this mistake.
Example: It was your ordinary Monday when Dirk Knightly saw Marissa. Evermoor had been good to her, and she brought Kally along. Together they rode through Aranor and on to Pawtucket. Dirk liked Marissa, but Kally was her own kind of Manhattan trouble.
This flies through proper names too quickly for the reader to digest. You must properly establish and characterize each name before throwing a new one at the reader.
Better: It was Monday when Dirk Knightly first saw Marissa. She was wholly likable with her quaint sensibility that a small town like Evermoor instills. Though shy, Dirk was determined to know her better. However, following Marissa up the lane was a spunky brunette. Today's would be no ordinary trip.
Kally has yet to be introduced by Marissa (plot action!), and you should save the other placenames to deal with once they get there.
The Characterization Dump is when the author makes pitifully inadequate attempts to give background information on each character. He realizes characterization is needed to differentiate between names, but he doesn't want to make a real narrative effort.
Example: Norm was standing in his usual corner of the bar. The bar was known for fast women and watered-down drinks. In walked Flo, the waitress. She was a 56-yr-old redhead who'd been doing this her whole life. "See anything you like?" she asked, pointing to the girls at the table. One girl was Mabel, a teenage artist into Emo and band. She was 5'4" and 105 lbs. Mabel saw Norm looking at her, and she studied him back. He was a little overweight at 180 lbs. and 5'6" tall...
Um..yeah. Quick, dirty details basically make characters disposable. Instead, work the details in as the characters themselves notice.
Better: Norm stood in his usual corner of the bar, since the stools were too narrow for his hips. The obviously experienced waitress walked by. "See anything you like?" she asked, pointing to the girls at the table. Norm's eyes were drawn to one in particular. She was a slight girl, but pretty and dressed with obvious taste. He wondered how old she was and if she liked short guys.
Notice this second version replaced some omniscient knowledge with limited but related adjectives. We might learn the exact truth later in the story, but for now we only get what the characters themselves know.
In summary, hook your reader before you bore them. You can dip into description and background, but keep the plot action going. One good way to do this is to include description only when people notice (Luke looked around, his eyes coming to a strange brown patch of grass in the otherwise green lawn) and background only when characters talk or think about it (Avoiding the brown patch reminded Luke of playing hide-and-seek in a graveyard with his brother when they were little).
Like the film concept of not wasting camera time, in writing information should always help the plot. If you must launch into a three-paragraph ramble, make it a daydream of one of your characters. Then, as plot action, you can have them "come to" with another character waiting on him or interrupting his reverie. Always the writer's mission: tell the story. As for background and description, assume a medical mission: do no harm. |
See if any of these begin awkwardly:
There is a 2-line caption as each character is introduced.
This one alternates nicely between past info and present action.
A full 5 paragraphs of preamble before any narrative begins.
Even the best can start slowly; 10 paragraphs before it gets moving!
Just the right amount of history before launching into action.
Nearly invisible background info inserted into a horrific tale.
Less of a lesson; more of a guilty pleasure.
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