This week: Allow Yourself to Rest Edited by: NaNoKit More Newsletters By This Editor
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Are you allowing yourself to rest? Or do you feel the need to keep busy? If you feel bad about taking a break, have you ever wondered why?
This week's Spiritual Newsletter is all about rest, and why there's no shame in the need to recharge our batteries.
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Last night I completed and submitted my MA dissertation. On the one hand, I am elated, not to mention rather relieved that I managed to complete what was a pretty challenging paper. I will also admit that after an undergraduate degree in Politics, Philosophy and Economics, and an MA in Philosophy with a focus on Political Theory and Ethics, I look forward to a break from these subjects because politics especially is very messy at this moment in time! On the other hand, I feel as though I ought to leap into my next project. As though I ought to be doing something. There is a sense of guilt in just sitting back and taking a deep breath, and permitting myself to relax. Also, oddly perhaps, part of my identity feels as though it’s tied in with being a student, and whilst I haven’t yet graduated – I won’t know my result until December – now that I am done, I no longer feel like a student and that means that something’s missing...
I know that I am not unique in feeling the way that I do. I know people who looked forward to their retirement, but once they got there, they felt lost. They no longer had a routine, they felt like they lacked a purpose, and rather than taking a well-deserved rest, enjoying their hobbies and all those things they’d put off because of work, they opted to return to paid employment. There is nothing wrong with this, of course, but it is a shame when it’s not what someone truly wants, but what they end up doing just because it’s what they’re used to. Likewise, when a friend of mine was made redundant, he received a generous sum of money, but rather than take a few weeks off at least, his shame of being unemployed was such that he immediately began hunting for his next job.
I’ll admit it – I do have a second undergraduate degree in mind. And there are a couple of short courses I am interested in. If I carry on like this, I will be studying until my own retirement, and possibly into retirement... And I do love to learn! There are many subjects that fascinate me. So, from that perspective it’s a good idea to keep on learning. It’s healthy to keep one’s brain active. It’s less healthy to feel bad about having a rest.
Everyone needs a rest from time to time. In fact, we all need some rest each and every day. Another friend of mine used to set off for work at 5 in the morning, six days a week, and not return home until somewhere between 7 and 8 in the evening. On her day off, work would still keep ringing. She was progressing nicely in her career. Made good money. She came to realise, however, that her life revolved around her job. When she was home, she still had to do the house work, she had to cook, and then she had to prepare for the next day of work, before going to sleep. Last week, she handed in her notice. She has a new job lined up that’s close to home, with fewer hours, and whilst she will earn less money, she is looking forward to a better work/life balance.
She told me that it’s scary and only half-jokingly wondered if she’s experiencing an early midlife crisis. Change is worrying, it is frightening. We get used to what we have, even if it’s not enjoyable, and we cannot know whether something else will be better, and feel better... Besides, there are all these messages out there about how we ought to climb the career ladder, how we ought to aim for success, so changing to a job that gives a better work/life balance but earns less money is seen as a step down.
Maybe that’s why we won’t allow ourselves to rest as much as we should. Keeping busy is seen as a positive. Not keeping busy is seen as being lazy, and a negative. And it is good to keep active, but taking time for yourself to do things you enjoy, or to simply be, is not being lazy. It is a necessity. We all need time to rest our minds and our souls, to pray, or to meditate, or to do what we do that centers us and allows us to find and maintain our inner peace.
It is not always easy even when we see that necessity. Many of us are very busy. Yet, where possible, it is good to make time for ourselves whenever we can – it is just as important to rest as it is to do everything else. After all, if we do not recharge our inner batteries, we soon end up running on empty...
I’m going to rest for a few days at least. Watch some stuff, begin reading the pile of books I recently picked up at a charity shop. Do some writing. Prepare the house for the kittens that may be arriving next week. Go for a walk in nature if the weather improves. I have earned it.
How about you? Are you resting?
NaNoKit
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