I didn't ask to be here

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I didn’t ask to be here,

Didn’t ask for all this pain.

I didn’t tell life to deal me this hand,

So that I would go insane.



I didn’t want to take my life,

Even though I tried.

I didn’t ask for you to walk out the door,

And leave me here to cry.



I don’t know how to cope with time,

It all seems so absurd.

I don’t know why I am like I am,

Why I can hardly speak a word.



My feelings are all locked up inside,

Because I don’t want to you see.

I don’t want you to feel pity,

I just need you to be there for me.



If only life were kinder,

If it didn’t give us pain.

Maybe I wouldn’t be who I am,

I might at least be halfway sain.



I didn’t tell the tears to fall,

Didn’t tell the words to flow.

I didn’t tell you I was sorry,

Because I let you go.



I didn’t want to write this,

But the words won’t stay inside.

I didn’t want you to know this,

Didn’t want you to read my mind.



I don’t need your sympathy,

Don’t want or need your love.

I need you to be there for me,

To listen and not judge.



I don’t want to sound,

Like I’m cruel and unkind.

But I need you to understand,

That I have to speak my mind.



I know this poem makes no sense,

To you it’s a jumble of words.

But emotions are not logic,

They are there, they are deep, they hurt.



I didn’t ask to be here,

Didn’t ask for all this pain.

I never really said,

I wanted to go insane.



I didn’t want these feelings,

To come out on this sheet.

I know what I have said,

Is anything but sweet.



Life is far from perfect,

Nothing ever is.

But if only it didn’t hurt so much,

I wouldn’t need these tears.



I wouldn’t need to write this,

Wouldn’t need to cry for help.

You wouldn’t have to read this,

And try to figure me out inside.