Do Unto Others

                      Do unto others as you would have done unto you

        Why is it that I have such an aversion to this motto? Why is it that I am willing to give to others, accept them as they are, see the good in them, and yet am so harsh and unaccepting of myself? More importantly, why did the feeling of acceptance and worthiness have such a short life span in my soul?

                        Ask God, she patiently prompts me...again

        Would He listen? Would He care? Am I worth of His time? Does He want to hear from me? Questions are abundant in my head, but I need to listen to my heart. I need to sit quietly and hear what my heart is trying to tell me and then listen and feel what He is trying to tell me. In my heart, I know He would not have called me His own if He did not want me, so I need desperately to rid my head of these destructive self flogging thoughts.

                        Ask God, she patiently encourages me...again

        Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, an understood and accepted fact that not everyone sees beauty in the same light, yet beauty does exist. Is it not also true for worth and value? In whose eye is the beauty and value seen? Who judges? If we say God is the only true judge, why do we judge ourselves all the time as well as judge those around us? How did this cycle take hold? How does one break the cycle of doubt?

                      Ask God, she patiently nudges me...again

      I ask myself these and voluminous other querries, only to find my answer to be retorted in more uncertanities. I listen to others so well. I feel their concerns and frustrations and am able to guide them to enlightenment, yet I am always in the shadows of my own doubts. I give others the right to ownership of themselves, nevertheless  waiver in my own worth. Do unto others is a mantra wholly followed by myself, yet not administered to myself. Why?

                      Ask God, she patiently prods me...again