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Just a journal for me to write,vent, or express. |
| I do not wish to provide a description for this blog. Its kind of like making plans, I hate to make plans, I am more of a go with the flow guy. So in light of this I suggest you just read to see if you like or not. |
| I have nothing to write about, but I woke up this morning wanting to write in my blog. I am pretty sure my mother cast a blogging spell on me.I can see it now..... all the lights low in the house some weird eerie music playing. Smoke and smells of goat eyeballs, and chicken feet saturating the house. The kitchen counters covered with other random ingredients and in the middle of it all there stands the Pearl of Wisdom in a brightly colored muumuu. With a loud shrieking laugh, leaning over a large pot atop the stove. Wooden spoon in hand slowly stirring some concoction while adding.....I dunno pen ink and pencil shaving with a dash of keyboard keys ( I am not to sure what a blogging spell calls for). All the while chanting some sing song spell and inserting my name into the PLACE NAME HERE part of her spell book. On another note, what do witches do with the potions that they are always shown making ? Do they just store them, or pour them on stuff, perhaps they drink them....all you witches out there get back to me on that, Okay back to the story that I stumbled into. Earlier in the evening my mom had called and invited me to "dinner". So, I arrive at her house a little bit early to hang out with the folks and as I open the front door my nose begins to be assaulted by the odd smells escaping my mothers potions ( I guess this is how I caught the spell). Confounded, I slowly walk into the house wondering " what the f*** is going on here, are mom and dad on ecstasy, did they forget I was coming ?". As I creep around the corner with my eyes halfway closed that way if I encounter something I don't want to see I can close them much more quickly. Once I am in the living room and realize my eyes are safe from also being assaulted I open them completely and begin to take in the bizarre scene unfolding in my mothers house. Still unsure if I want to know whats going on I quietly survey the scene, my mother is so enthralled in some chant about me she doesn't even noticed my presence. As I begin to realize I am completely put off by this I slowly walk back out the front door, run to my car and drive home. Thirty minutes later I receive a call. Looking down at my caller i.d. Mom scrolls across the screen. Hesitantly I pick up the phone and say "hello" " Eli, where are you I thought you were coming for dinner?" Acting as if I just woke up , in my best just woke up voice I say " Yea, I am coming I just woke up from a nap, be there in a few minutes" "Okay see you soon, love you" " Love you to mom" Still unsure about this whole thing, I open up the laptop and make a quick recording and documentation of what had unfolded, I then call my friend Timmy J and tell him if I don't call back in twenty minutes to send the police to my house and make up some story about my mom telling me she heard some weird noises. Then I jump in the truck and head back over to the loony bin. I arrive at the house, all seems normal. Now the porch light and the lights inside the house are on and the smell of a delicious roast is bellowing from the house. still a bit hesitant I open the door cautiously. Watching for flying objects or a net falling from the ceiling. When none of the above appears I walk in casually to a normal scene of my dad watching television on max volume while trying to have a conversation with my mom while she cooks dinner. Knowing that all is safe for now I make myself a glass of ice tea, take a drink, pour it out because it is some crazy flavored ice tea that my mom cant get enough of and ask her to make normal tea. Then I sit down and hang out with my parents making no mention of what I had seen earlier. Which brings us to now, me having nothing to write about and being forced to out myself to my mother and furthermore out my mother for being a weirdo. |
| Well I have absolutely nothing to write about. I am simply entering something to see if it will jump start me into actually making entries into my blog. Its not really working right now though, probably because I am incredibly hungry. So, I will go eat and see how I am feeling afterwards. |
| These two things are by the far the most prominent of any pet peeves I could ever think of. I constantly find myself correcting my friends and other peoples for that matter grammar and spelling. Even in my second language, I am fortunate enough to speak two languages English and Spanish and I have found that it irritates me even more when the mistake is made in Spanish. If anyone see's a spelling or grammar mistake in any of my writing please correct me, I feel that grammar and spelling convey a lot about a person and I strive to be exemplary in both. |
| Here I sit, or lay rather with my laptop in front of me and nothing to write about. I figured if I just continuously write about how I have nothing to write about, one day something will come along. Actually you know what, I do have something. It's rather trivial but fun nonetheless. The other day I had taken two guys who are working for me ( otherwise known as my cousins) out to eat for the effort they had put forth in the days prior. My youngest cousin, who is a quirky individual to say the least, had ordered some chicken tacos. While minding his own business,enjoying his meal, I noticed something which I thought was weird. The meal came with three tacos some rice and beans, a normal taco plate but really this is of no importance. Like I said I noticed something weird, well at least I thought it was weird. Wait before I dive into this I should probably point out the fact that my mother is Kay Jordan, a beautifully intelligent,interesting,and funny mother, that subject is a whole other blog in itself which I will save for another time. Wow, look at all the ideas that are coming to me. Anyways like I was saying....proudly saying. She is my mother and if you frequent her blog you have probably read her entry about "weird stuff" or the idiosyncrasies she has. After reading about them, which are all true she is odd sometimes but I guess we all are, I realized that I to have many idiosyncrasies. That realization lead me into a phase of further investigation of myself and things I realized I am weird about to, all of which are escaping me at the moment, but that is a good thing because I am attempting to stay on topic. Back on topic. So, my cousin had ordered chicken tacos and as I said he was minding his own business enjoying his meal when I noticed something weird. He had finished his first taco, not that they are numbered or anything but the first one you grab becomes the first taco and thus forth. Then moved on to his second taco.All was normal and I continued to look around and observe things taking place in the restaurant. When I looked back at my cousins plate all was not normal ! I was surprised to see that he had moved onto the third taco without finishing the second taco which made me wonder why and honestly bothered me. You see all three tacos were chicken and all three tacos were prepared the same way, and obviously he was still hungry because he moved onto the third taco.So, my confusion and curiosity were driving me crazy, and I was forced to ask him why he chose to move onto the third, tossing out the second as if it were no good. He simply replied " I dunno". Which confused me even more. You see the way that I believe tacos should be eaten is in the order you grab them....remember once you have picked up a taco that designates its number which should follow suit in the order you eat the tacos. There are no fractions in tacos, you cant go to a restaurant and order 1.42 tacos and a cold beer. Anyways, I am not saying that if you order 3 tacos you are forced by some divine taco law to eat all three, by all means eat as many or as little as you want. But once you have designated a taco number two why, if your still hungry, would you move onto taco 3. Because if you have 3 tacos and you have already designated 2 of them then by default the third taco is, of course, number 3, it's simple math. Now, I would understand and would have presented no further interrogation if the tacos were made of different meats or maybe had a special taco twist that the previous taco didn't have. However all three of these tacos were indeed prepared the same none were better, worse, or different then any of its companions. So why, why , why would he have moved on to the third taco? I never received an explanation and still to this day don't understand why he chose to take this course of consumption, nor does it really matter. Of course I would like to know what was so more enticing about the triplet taco, but I understand I never will and I am okay with that. As weird as this whole situation was to me, the really weird thing about all this is why do I care. Haha. I just feel strongly that you should follow a certain order in your taco consumption! So I guess I am curious to know how do you eat your tacos. Do you follow a set plan and once you designate your tacos do you continue in that designation, or do you haphazardly grab tacos consuming them in a tornado like manner leaving some tacos feeling used and less important than other tacos? Furthermore have you ever even once had this thought or begun to even think that there was a sequence in taco eating, or any other food that is served in numbers. I anxiously await answers...I need some closure on this! haha I questioned some friends about this and this what I A. If the second taco for some reason tasted weird then they would move on, but they all said they all said they follow order when eating tacos B. No, he didn't go back and finish the third taco. |
| I really wish I even had something to write about right now. I continuously have an overwhelming want to write in my blog,but when it comes to putting the pen to the paper or I guess the fingertips to the keys, nothing comes out. I don't know why my brain is turned of, I like to think I am a creative and interesting person but from the looks of my blogs I'm like an unwanted sore that only flares up when you scratch it. I mean not that i have experiences with unwanted sores...haha. That completely gives off the wrong impression but screw it I'm gonna leave it on there. Eventually one day I am going to have something to write about, one of these days. I just feel like I am trapped in this intellectual stagnancy at times wondering what happened to me and my quick wittedness. Maybe I should be writing up a lost poster and posting it around town and on the writing.com website for my brain, if anyone has any idea where it may be please let me know. |
| I am sure everyone has been holding their breather waiting to hear...or read I guess I should say, more of my thoughts. So I'll give you a moment to catch your breathe. I am glad I decided to come back, I am not sure what prompted this decision but it probably has to do with the lack of intellectual interaction I currently have in my life. I do love and cherish my friends but they are not all at the better end of the I.Q. spectrum. I just took a minute to go and read my previous blog entries and as I read them I was rather impressed with what I had written. It also reminded me of the way I felt at that time and my desire to continue feeling that way. I am glad to say I once again posses a zeal and zest for life that I tend to lose every now and again. it is so easy to get caught up in everything going on in the world and begin to concentrate on the negative aspect of everything rather than the positive. I recently turned 24 so I would not say I am the most knowledgeable or insightful person in the world but I do consider myself rather intelligent. Over the last few months of my life however I had been a little less positive about myself and my life. Things really took a turn for the worse and I allowed myself to become somebody I did not want to be. I mean I am not saying you would find me with a needle in my arm or strong arming some old lady, but I was not leading the life I should or wanted to be. Fortunately I was given an opportunity to get back to who I truly am and am glad I did. I still struggle with things, as we all do, but I am making positive head way once again and intend to continue in that. Ofcourse now that I am trying so hard to continually better my life there are many obstacles, but a good challenge is healthy for me so I now appreciate those obstacles rather then allow defeat. A few weeks ago I had a great conversation with a friend I really am glad to have. She is wise beyond her age and one of the few people I feel I can honestly speak with and seek advice from. That conversation really stuck with me and I replay it my head a lot. This conversation was about myself and my outlook and I spoke negatively of myself and allowed a defeatist attitude to temporarily control me. During this conversation she spoke about a book she had read that had really helped her, in particular she spoke about a quote that stuck with her and she sent the quote to me. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." I cant even begin to explain the volumes that this spoke to me, it is a perfect and spot on statement. One that I will never forget. In light of my newly acquired exigence for success and positivity in my life this quote could not have found me at a better time. You see allowing negativity into your life affects you in more ways than you realize I had really underestimated the havoc that a negative outlook can wreak on your life and relationships. Especially for the people who love and care for you and desire nothing more than to see you be happy and successful. If you indulge in a negative outlook and continuously focus on the things your not doing in your life and the accomplishment you are not attaining then you are essentially destroying yourself and any possibility you do have of succeeding. I have come to learn that in life you have to first train yourself to appreciate the things you accomplish daily and enjoy the small moments in your life and to be happy when you realize those daily goals. Eventually you will forget about what your not doing and feel good about what you are doing. Once that has become habit those daily accomplishments begin to turn into larger accomplishments you have always dreamed of, and the best part of it all is that you will begin to like your life and more importantly yourself. If you spend all your time concentrating on what your not doing then your life simply becomes inundated with negativity, and in the end you only beat yourself up and cause your life to be miserable and a waste. I only say all this because I because I know how much it sucks to feel as if you are doing nothing with your life. Furthermore I now know how it feels to be on both sides of this monster. The realization that things can get better and you can do the things you want to with your life is a great weight off your shoulders. I really don't know why I wrote all this, I guess with the hopes that someone that needs to hear this will, and it will help them the way it helped me. So hopefully somebody does read this and it does help them out. |
| My friend Kris won a free meal for ten people today at Benigans, ofcourse I was quite pleased to find out I was going to get a free lunch today. Although I am not a big fan of Benigans anything free is always cool. At lunch time we packed everything up and headed to the restaurant to take advantage of the free meal. We had to meet with a financial advisor and let him do his speech thing before he purchased our meal for us. This was cool and enlighting and I will most likely try to use his services. |
| I wonder if dogs get jealous like girls do. I just returned home for the day and while I was out I happened to have played with two other dogs. As usual when I got home Maverik was excited to see me. He ran towards me, but as he got closer he began to slow down and then proceeded to sniff every inch of me. After realizing he smelled not one but two other dogs on me he slowly walked away and at the moment is not even near me. So I suppose he is upset with me, even though you cannot possibly read this Maverik, this is my public apology......for cheating on you. |
| I have been feeling a bit under the weather over the last few days,spending hours upon hours trying to sleep it off, and on the times that I did feel up to doing anything I opted for a little social interaction rather than buddying up the keyboard for further isolation. This explains the lack of my entries into this blog. Upon the inception of the idea of this blog, I was excited, I believed this was going to be my own little thing, here waiting for me ready to take my thoughts and ideas when I felt like inputing them. Kind of like a friends with benefits thing, there for me when I want it to be and not nagging when im too busy. hahaha. I now understand this is not the case. I originally logged on just to see if I had any comments not sure if I was going to make an entry. Then I saw my inbox which held about 15 "reminders to update" . This made me feel kind of bad for the lack of attention I had provided my blog. On top of the fact that my mother, who helped me create this blog, has given me daily " reminders to update". So this blog has become a nagging girlfriend and furthermore my mom likes her. I didnt know what I was getting into.Anyways I had other things to write about so I will. I have always been somewhat of a wild child. Always the one to throw caution to the wind and just go for whatever. Never one to stop and second guess my decision. I always felt that being cautious was only a way to miss out on the fun and interesting things.Not that being cautious is bad and to those who choose to be far sighted ...more power to you. Over the years my lack of caution has provided me with many interesting stories/scars/lifelong memories. Also many near death incidents and other incidents that I am not so proud to speak of. None the less my life has been rather exciting and enjoyable. Moving on, I was driving,riding rather, to work the other day. I was late so of course I was forced to speed, traveling well over one hundred miles per hour a thought occurred to me, " if I wreck, then I wont be worrying about being late,work wont even be an issue because I wont be able to work" along with this thought I was overcome with a totally foreign and completely unfamiliar feeling. so I slowed down and arrived to work late. More importantly I arrived to work alive and well. Later in the day, I had borrowed my mothers car due to the fact that my car, unfortunately, is out of commission and it was supposed to rain which doesnt mix well with motorcycles. I was on my way to a class which,once again, I was late to. So of course I was forced to speed yet again. While cruising down the road breaking the law I again was overcome with this foreign and unfamiliar feeling and a thought passing through my head that went something like this " I dont want to get pulled over and get a ticket, or even worse wreck my moms car". So I slowed down and eventually arrived at my class....late. But I was alive and free of tickets. As I sat through class daydreaming as usual,attempting to pass the time I was going back through my day and the two instances of my speeding and not speeding crossed my mind, both of which brought on that foreign and unfamiliar feeling. upon further investigation and scrutiny I first realized that in both situations not one mention was made about my tardiness and everything proceeded as planned I then realized that feeling I had experienced was caution. As soon as the thought of me practicing caution occurred to me it was like a carnival exploded into my head. Bright lights flashing everywhere, loud sing song music blasting through the air,little midgets dressed as clowns in bright colors with large shoes running circles in my head, holding up signs that read " your getting old, your cautious" In reality it wasnt that I was getting old or that practicing caution was bad or a sign of age. The fact is I realized that caution for a long while has been something I lacked, something that is indeed a valuable trait for any person. It never was the case that I was unable to posses or to dumb to understand the need for caution. Simply put I was stuck in the common belief that "lacking caution" or as more people refer to it as being crazy was a way to express your masculinity. To show how rough and tough you are, because as we all know that impresses everyone. The point is that in life its not how hard and fast or crazy and caution-less you can be, its not about what you might miss out on or the impression you try to give off. What it is about is the things you dont miss out on and the impressions you dont mean to give off. So take a chance to sit back relax and appreciate everything you do have and quit hustling so hard to get somewhere or get something you dont have. Take life at your own pace and live to impress yourself not others. |
| Well, I haven't had anything that I really felt was worth writing about lately. For some reason I have been in somewhat of a mental slump. Due to the prompting of my mother I am writing something simply to be able to say that I updated my blog..haha. I guess thats all I have to say right now, my life has been rather uneventfull for the last few days. Hopefully things will pick back up here shortly. |
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