Nut Hut Crew

After listening to me read aloud something I wrote, My friend, Bob, told me that I have the ability to paint a picture with words. He told me that with the reading, he discovered more about my inner workings than he had previously known. Unfortunately, I’m not entirely sure if it’s an image anyone needs to see! I think my main concern is that while creating the proposed picture, the observer may catch a glimpse of what is best left unseen. Does the world really need to know just how deep my psychosis runs? Or is it that in laughing at the madness of my world, they may find themselves relating? In either case, the image may not always be a pretty one.
As I sit in my chaotic living room typing on my computer at the desk I insisted be situated there, I find myself thinking, “Is all of this pandemonium necessary? Do I really need to be amidst the bedlam of everyday life in the Geis household?” The answer is yes and no. While my initial reason was to keep an eye on my children while I work, I discover myself throwing them out as often as possible; not that they listen to me, of course. I’m not entirely sure if I need the confusion to concentrate or not. Perhaps I do, and that says a lot about the person I have become.
That, of course leads me to the question, “Who am I?” I seem to have this odd ability to draw all sorts of people around me. To each, I present a somewhat different facade. I asked my friend and favorite member of The Nut Hut Crew, Amanda, who she thought I was. In my opinion, Amanda is endearing. She’s a mousey little thing and absolutely adorable. There’s more to Amanda than meets the eye, although she rarely lets anyone see that side of her. I think she prefers to fade into the background. It has become my self-appointed mission to change that particular habit.
Amanda proceeded to enlighten me that I was witty, full of one-liners that would crack up anyone with a sense of humor, sarcastic, impressive, and willing to help others in the blink of an eye. I also wear my emotions on my sleeve and hold nothing back. All of this is very flattering, not that I was fishing for compliments, although lord knows we all love them, but does it really accurately describe who I am? Maybe it’s all a matter of perspective. To her, I am all of those things. To another, I may be something else entirely.
Bob, Glenn, Krista, and Nick make up the rest of The Nut Hut Crew. Now there’s an odd bunch. I met them, with the exception of Bob and Nick, through my work at college. In addition to torturing myself with endless, and sometimes I suspect pointless classes, I also work for the Hausman Center, which is the program for the students with disabilities. All of the Nut Hut Crew have degrees of vision impairment. It is my job, or so my boss tells me, to help them with any academic problems they may run into, such as transcribing textbooks, or finding their way through the rabbit warren of hallways.
To them, I am an honorary member, but what draws them to me? What is it about me that they find so fascinating? Perhaps it’s because I am just as sick of a puppy as they are. It’s also a possibility that they just like watching the train wreck that is my life. It gives them a sense of security to know that there are things in this world that are much worse than their own issues.
For Nick, the member I know the least about, I am deemed worthy of the title, “Mistress of Dirty Words,” of which I know quite a few, some in other languages. As for me being bestowed with this title, all I have to say is, those are not the only words I know, just the most discriptive! What is better than a dirty word for getting your point across EXACTLY how you meant it? Why else would there be a whole host of them in other languages? Dirty words are an equal opportunity option for those who need to tell you exactly what they think of you. Some of us are just better at them than others! Personally, I think that someone his age should have his own list of them by now. Maybe I just like saying them to Nick because he shocks so easily. If he weren’t such an easy target then maybe I wouldn’t feel such a sadistic need to torture him.
Bob, on the other hand, feels that we all have things in our lives to be ashamed of; I just have a self-assured way of making others comfortable with their own issues. I have a certain way of saying, welcome to my world! Are you in or out? This is my life. This is who I am. Deal with it. An admirable quality, according to Bob. I sugarcoat nothing, but at the same time, I have a caring, responsible motherish side. He describes it as a good balance between wild child and mom. Life may be chaotic, but I would never let anything happen to my family and friends. I balance the turmoil and responsibility very well. Most people wouldn’t be able to handle my world. The majority would literally end up in the nut hut. I find a way to balance the obvious stress of the two. It’s the way I balance it that he finds commendable. I make sure I can be trusted, but at the same time I can help you laugh at yourself. He says, and I quote, mostly because I can’t think of a better way to say it, “She’s not blowing smoke up your ass!” I like Bob. He seems to be a kindred spirit. He also likes the way I sing, which just goes to shows you that he’s biased. In actuality, I sound like a dieing frog. Glenn is of a different opinion as to how well I sing. I think he agrees with me, but is too much of a gentleman to say so.
Glenn and Krista is actually one word. Short of a crowbar, it is damn near impossible to separate them. They are commonly referred to as, “the newlyweds.” Trying to get a separate opinion is like trying to wash a cat. It’s possible, but is it really worth the scratches? The words "Get a room" are often heard in the presence of these two, especially when Bob and Nick are around.
“Ahhh”, Glenn begins. “I would classify you as a 34 yr old going on 20”. He hesitates, choosing his next words carefully. He seems to feel that I derive great pleasure from the consumption of immense quantities of alcohol. Did he just call me a lush? This is not entirely true, but then again everyone has their guilty pleasures. Apparently, I am quite the interesting individual. I am type of person who it would be best not to piss off, but at the same time, the kind of person you want in your corner. Glenn thinks he’s smarter than I am, but that’s not all that surprising. Glenn thinks he is smarter than most people are. Perhaps he is, but that’s still no reason to remind the masses that we are the biggest bunch of morons he has ever met. He assured me later he decided to be sarcastic to balance out Amanda and Bob’s answers. A word of advice for Glenn. Life is not this serious. If he doesn’t learn to lighten up a bit he’s going to have an aneurism!
It took both Bob and I to keep Glenn quiet while Krista gave her answer. Not an easy task let me assure you! She had not heard Glenn’s answer, yet they were eerily similar. Did I mention that Glenn and Krista is one word? Krista thinks I’m funny, sarcastic, and would make a perfect lawyer because of my shark-like attitude. There is a bite to my words, and I can convince someone I am right even when I’m not. She assured me that I don’t do things that will hurt any one, but after a moments hesitation added that I will if I have to. My honesty is questionable, but my intent is usually sincere. She feels that it’s a contradiction that she can trust me. What exactly does THAT mean? There is certain shock value to my demeanor and sometimes I scare her. When it comes down to it, Krista is more like me than she cares to admit. My age and experience draw her to me. It’s almost as if I say to the world,” Give me your best shot!” and when it does, I respond with, “Is that all you got?” I work a situation work to my advantage and she’d like to learn to be more like that. I don’t cross the line, I just erase it and draw myself a new one.
The consensus seems to be that I’m a sarcastic bitch with a heart of gold. Am I? Probably, but is that all there is? I love to sing, however awful the attempt may be. I am a fairly decent cook and a terrible housekeeper. My grades in college are good, mostly because of my ability to bullshit with the best of them. I poke my nose in where it doesn’t belong when I think it’s necessary. Sometimes I do it even when it’s not necessary. I’m funny that way. I run towards the unpredictable, mostly because I can. All of this is an honest description of me, yet at the same time doesn’t accurately explain who I am.
This whole topic brings to mind that song by Billy Joel, “The Stranger.” Well we all have a face that we hide away forever, and we take them out and show ourselves when everyone has gone. That pretty much sums it up. A friend's eye is a good mirror of who we are, but how others see us isn’t necessarily how we see ourselves. Considering that we tend to be our own worst critic, perhaps the picture we paint for other people is the better option. We all live in the land of delusions, but after all, isn’t it a happy place to be?