I like this idea, but must confess as an old man I immediately thought of what might happen when a kid tried to emulate Tommy the turtle or Danny the Dolphin and their own story didn't work out the same way. A lot of the teaching of lessons is the result of how an idea, like a positive moral precept (i.e. kindness, honesty etc...), intersects with the learners experience in the world. Pro-social virtues are great, but often less apparently so in a context where individualistic values like drive, self-sufficiency and achievement are baked into the experience, academic/educational contexts for example. Thanks, gave me something to overthink about, always a plus.
"bowels constructed", This is the bit where I fully lost track of the symbolism/imagery. The ending seems to land at a conclusive "we return to where we come from" but then pick back up again with "onward we go", kind of jarring. Thanks
I've walked through so many flocks of Canada Geese, I can confirm this is certainly in keeping with their byzantine politics (fowlitics?). Very clever.
Seems like a trap which has yet to spring. Kinda seems padded with brittishisms as well. Specifying "Cornish" pasties, Tab, and she's gotta be having a "cuppa" kinda seem like cliches, but maybe it's just my American eyes. I wouldn't specify Salen's hotdogs, Pepsi and a mug o' joe. All around good though, caught my attention.
"The past,
a story well-told,
leaves no trace." I like this bit a lot. This lotus symbolism, for some reason, leads me to start trying to compound or hyphenate word pairs (i.e. lotus-sprouts, shiningbright, chilling-plight etc...). 'Think the "persons" in the subject line/synopsis is meant to be possessive.
Good work.
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