And a few of God's people (the ones who actually think about things) said AMEN!!
Would we recognize God if he sat down beside us? Probably not, if he violated our prejudices. Too many of us do exactly what you describe in your poem. We preach love and practice hate. We preach acceptance and practice rejection. Far too many of us. Could it be ALL of us? Are any of us truly free of prejudice? Do all of us still have work to do in becoming more loving and more accepting of others? I like to think I am accepting of everyone, but if I am truly honest with myself, I must admit that I will more readily trust someone of my own race and my own nationality. I think most of us can say the same.
Interesting. You know you're hard up for a date when you're bringing home a zombie! LOL! Although I will admit there have been times I've wondered if I did exactly that.
One thing that is missing: What caused the zombie apocalypse? Doesn't need to be a lengthy and elaborate explanation. Just a short line about an asteroid, a botched science experiment, a fungal outbreak, whatever.
Wonderful poem! Having escapef from the patriarchal fundamentalist church of my childhood, this poem struck a deep chord within me. I have seen so many women subjugated to the will of their husbands, and forced to put on a smile for the cameras. But the one that I thought of immediately, from the first stanza, was Malala Yousufzai. I wish she could read this. Even more, I hope for freedom for oppressed women in the Middle East and indeed, all over the world.
I'm sorry, this was supposed to be a review of your poem. Your words move me beyond merely offering advice on your writing. And that is perhaps the greatest tribute I could offer. Write on!
I loved this story! The character is completely believable in her actions. A telepath would definitely hide her ability from the normals, for fear of what they would do to her if they knew. Finding a kindred spirit in the horse was a nice touch, as was having the afflicted character become the savior.
In the second paragraph, the phrase "some strange extra-sensory phenomenon even she did not understand" seemed a bit weak to me, although the following sentence clarified the meaning nicely. Try replacing "some strange" with "an" and see if you think it flows more strongly and surely.
You have created a compelling story here, with two strong characters, the girl and the horse. I see a lot of potential for this to blossom into a fullfledged novel. This could do very well as a young adult novel, given the fascination many young ladies have with horses. This is a winner!
Wow! What a dark poem! This truly captures the helpless feeling of a person watching a loved one losing the battle with addiction. Powerful words! Two very minor grammatical corrections in the final few lines: release is misspelled, and you need the -ed on extinguished. Fix that, copy, and send this to a publisher! Impressive!
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