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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/caseymack
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5 Public Reviews Given
5 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by Casey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
"It smoulders and spreads" smoulders just didn't seem like the right word here. It's a seed right? I don't identify with a seed smouldering. Pretentious is spelt wrong, I'm not sure if the way I have spelt it is correct but pretty sure you misspelt it. "All your air are belonging to me" would sound better as "All your air now belongs to me". I get the impression that this poem is about a controlling selfish lover who is destroying/ smothering/abusing their partner yet some parts make me think it's about a physical battle or war. I understand metaphors but something makes it seem to change from one thing to another at one point. It is a good poem though and I like your style/flow. There definitely seems to be strong emotion behind your words. And yet at another point it seems you turn that around and are sort of blowing off the subject as if they mean nothing and yet you resent them at the same time. "I could never thrive in a world that thrives on me" this confused me, I think I know what you were getting at but may be wrong. It seemed to me u ment you could never thrive in a world that uses you and if that is the case then "thrives on me" doesn't fit for me as it makes it seem like you mean to say something else. I hope this helps and comes across as constructive.


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Review of Hero Story  Open in new Window.
Review by Casey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
very funny. There's a few spelling mistakes though
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Review by Casey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
this made me realise I have no idea of the meaning of words such as 'noun' ect, I always get confused as to what is a noun, adverb ect. Also this turned out to be hilarious, made me laugh thanks :)
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Review of Funny Madlibs  Open in new Window.
Review by Casey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (1.0)
this didn't work for me, it said {blank noun} ect instead of the words I put in.
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