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26 Public Reviews Given
26 Total Reviews Given
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Public Reviews
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Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thank you for sharing this poem on WDC. I really enjoyed reading it. I read it out loud, and liked the way the lines flowed so smoothly. I also like the fact that, though words lean slightly to the humorous side, it carries with it a thought provoking idea that perhaps, in man's arrogance, he is mistaken is assuming that everything evolved for the benefit of mankind? Considering the mess mankind has made of life on this big, blue marble that is zipping along through space, it is a legitimate question to ponder. Write On!

Great job with this one!

~~~ Kimberly/LiveToWrite


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Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Survivor48! *BigSmile*


My name is Kimberly. I enjoyed reading other poems written you have written, so I decided to stop by your portfolio, once again, to offer my review of your poem entitled "What Is Considered Success?"

It is my hope that my suggestions and insights will prove useful to you as a writer.

How This Poem Makes Me Feel: *StarfishP*


I connected very strongly with the subject of this poem. It declares a powerful truth that true wealth is not measured by a dollar sign, but rather by how our inner character portrays who we are. Dignity, compassion, empathy, and kindness to others make them far wealthier than someone who may have millions of dollars in the bank but who is morally bankrupt. You have illustrated that principle nicely with this poem.

My Favorite line/s: *ScallopB*

"Wrestling to earn dignity through self-respect."

This a very truthful statement. We all struggle, at one time or another, to maintain our dignity and self-respect, especially when times are hard.

Suggestions: *ButterflyV*

I believe you did an excellent job with this poem. I like the flow, the theme, and the impact of the message. I am giving this poem 5 *Star* *Star* *Star* *Star* *Star*

Congratulations! You've done a great job! Keep up the wonderful writing! *BigSmile*

Have a great day!

~~~~Kimberly/LiveToWrite *FlipFlops2* *StarfishP* *Wink*







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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Review of Help Us Help YOU!  Open in new Window.
Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Dear StoryMaster,

Thank you for writing this article to help inform writers about various ways to gain exposure, for not only our own writings, but for the writing.com website as well.

I am relatively new to the website. I was a member many years ago, but as it sometimes does, Life interfered for awhile, and I had to leave. I am back now, and trying to get up to speed as quickly as possible. I am eager to explore all of the options available to writers on this site.

Articles, such as this one, make it easier for writers to learn their way around, especially for newbies like myself.

I am a member of several social networking sites, and I am always looking for innovative ways to gain new exposure for my writing. This article offers easy-to-understand tips and suggestions on how to do just that.

I especially like your reminder about only emailing websites/webmasters one time, as to avoiding being considered a nuisance, or even worse, a "spammer." Sometimes, in our eagerness to spread the word, we don't realize just how easy it is to fall into the trap of being too enthusiastic with our efforts. When that happens, we defeat the very thing we are trying to achieve. Thank you for reminding writers to forth and share the word about this wonderful website, but to do it responsibly.

The sample email template is an excellent example for writers to follow. Thank you for including it in this article.

Sincerely,

Kimberly ("LiveToWrite")
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Review of My Home  Open in new Window.
Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Item Title and ID #: "My Home" I.D.# 2025807
Author's name: Little-Ronnie
Type of writing: Poetry, Static Item
Reviewed by: "LiveToWrite" (Kimberly)

Dear Little-Ronnie,

Hello, and Welcome to Writing.com! Thank you for sharing your work with our community members.

My name is Kimberly ("LiveToWrite"), and I am stopping by today to offer my review of your poem entitled "My Home."

1st impression: I really enjoyed reading this poem. I am a US Army veteran, and I enjoy reading items that show support and understanding for my fellow veterans. That support is greatly appreciated.

My favorite verse/s or line/s: I have 2.
The first is:

"If you really want to show,
the support we all should give.
Then show it with your actions
and the way you choose to live."

The second is:

"No government is perfect,
I will support it anyway.
Right or wrong, this is my home,
And I am here to stay."

I like your phrasing. It drives home the point that it is easy to give "lip-service" to a patriotic idea, but if someone really means what they say, their actions should back up their words.

I also like the fact that the writer has the depth of maturity to realize, and understand, the fact that no government is 100% perfect. Choosing to support your country, especially knowing that it is not always right in some of it's decisions and actions, shows what true patriotism is.

Suggestions:I would suggest inserting a period, in the first stanza, after the word "fuss."
I would also suggest replacing the period with a comma in the 4th stanza, 2nd line, after the word "give." Other than those two suggestions, I wouldn't change a thing. It flows smoothly and is easy to read. I see no obvious spelling errors.

Conclusion: You have written an effective poem that showcases what it means to be a patriotic citizen. You've done a great job with this poem!

Once again, welcome to the neighborhood. I look forward to reading more of your writings. Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,

Kimberly "LiveToWrite"


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Dear Kathie,

This is a beautiful poem. As a mother that has lost a child myself, I can identify with the sentiments expressed by this poem. It touched me deeply. Writing can be cathartic and healing.

I particularly liked this phrasing: "Where flowers are lollipops, trees dangle dolls and chocolate bars, paths are covered in lemon drops. A Gingerbread home is full of delights."
It's like taking a stroll in Willy Wonka's world, which, as we all know, was ultimately designed for children.

The imagery is spot-on. It effectively draws the reader into the writer's impression of a peaceful and carefree world for a child.

I enjoyed reading this poem. I offer my deepest condolences for the reason it was written.
May Courtney forever be at peace sailing those rainbows and prancing on her pink pony, and may the Angels forever watch over you both.

~~~ Kimberly


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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Review of Number Ten  Open in new Window.
Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a cute children's poem. I like that it tells an entertaining story that most children will find as funny. I like your choice of wording, as it makes it easy to envision the scene as it is played out. I also like that the language is simple and age appropriate for children from older toddlers to around age 7 or 8.

The only thing I see that you might want to consider is the current word choice for the phrase "...or I will give a boost." I understand the word choice, as far as making the rhyme work with "roost", but when I read it, my mind automatically went to the word "boot" and kind of stumbled a bit on the current word selection.

Other than that tiny thing, this is a wonderful children's poem and I enjoyed reading it. You did a great job! I look forward to reading more of your work. Keep writing!

~~~ Kimberly


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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Review of My Chains  Open in new Window.
Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Thank you for sharing your poem. The determination to overcome any obstacle society can put in the subjects path is very evident. I liked the wording you chose to demonstrate that it isn't always outside influences that keep us from growing and succeeding. Our inner demons can be very powerful deterrents that can derail our best intentions. We are limited by the depths of of belief in ourselves.

One question I have: Is the strong object, mentioned in the second verse, referring to the first line of the first verse or is it referring to society's opinion that the subject can't break the chains?

If I can offer a constructive suggestion, you might want to consider choosing one type of metal for the ending of the first sentence, instead of listing two. Or perhaps making the word metal, in the 7th line, plural in order to agree with the two metals listed in line 1. Either would help smooth the flow of reading. (When I first read that line, I paused to consider what, exactly, "brass steel" was?)

I enjoyed reading this piece. It presents a clear mental picture of struggle and determination to overcome. Remember, my suggestions are just that, suggestions. Feel free to use or discard them at your discretion.

I look forward to reading more of your work. Great job! Keep writing!

~~~ Kimberly


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Thank you for sharing this incredibly painful experience. Please accept my heartfelt condolences on your brother's passing. Writing is suppose to be good for the soul. Sometimes, just putting all of the emotions down on paper can start to help the healing process along. I lost my infant son in 2004, so I whole-heartedly agree with your observation that there "is a huge difference between imagining the agony and feeling the misery." Writing became the only "therapy" that worked to calm the storm in my mind and make the pain in my heart manageable.
Addiction is a terrible thing, not only for the person using, but for the family and friends off that person. They are the ones left behind to pick up the pieces and try to find a way to move forward when their world shatters upon the death of their loved one. I pray you find a measure of comfort and peace in your fond memories of your brother. He sounds like he was a loving brother.

Sincerely,
~~~ Kimberly
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Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I enjoyed reading this poem. I like the way it personifies Misery, with physical attributes such as wanting to hold your hand. The poem accurately depicts the craftiness of Misery. It is a stealthy, sweet-talking creature, and your choice of word showcases this beautifully.

Thank you for sharing your work. I look forward to reading more of your writings. Great job!

~~~ Kimberly :)
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Review of Wayward Word  Open in new Window.
Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello, and thank you for sharing this poem.

I enjoyed reading this piece. It is easy to relate to, especially for a fellow writer. We have all found ourselves in the middle of an all-consuming writing project, speeding happily along, pouring out our ideas onto the page, when suddenly we hit a snag. All we need is that one perfect word to convey what we are trying to say, but unfortunately, it remains just outside of our grasp. Our work flow comes to a screeching halt, as we stare helplessly at the screen, struggling to find just the right word to set the tone. We know what we are trying to say, but try as we might, that word remains elusive.

The more we develop our writing craft, the more we come to learn, and appreciate, the process of writing, including the inevitable frustration that comes along with it. The process is designed to teach us as we inform others. The search for the perfect word strengthens our writing and critical thinking skills, as well as honing our problem-solving skills. Anyone that has ever written something they feel passionate about can recognize themselves in this poem.

Overall, this is a great piece. **Please note: The only thing that prevented me from giving it a solid 5 stars concerns the spelling errors noted below. Other than that, you did a great job. Keep up the good work. I look forward to reading more pieces by you. Write On!

** Spelling corrections, by line:
Line 4- correct the spelling of "mommentum" to "momentum"
Line 6- correct the spelling of "momments" to "moments"
Line 7- correct the spelling of "oppertunity" to "opportunity"
Line 11- correct "journey's" to read "journeys "
Line 11- correct the spelling of "inentions" to "intentions"

I hope this constructive criticism helps :)
Have a great day!
~~~Kimberly

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Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.0)
This is an interesting poem. The imagery is vivid, and the idea that an innocent looking can of soup can disguise underlying raging passion is a unique and refreshing perspective.

The flow of the piece is a little disjointed. I had to go back and re-read it a couple of times to get a better feel for the piece. I would constructively suggest trying to smooth out the flow a little bit in order to make it easier to read. Other than that, I enjoyed reading it. Thank you for sharing it.

This piece has a lot of potential. I look forward to reading more of your work. Good job! Write On! :)
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Review of Stronger  Open in new Window.
Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi! Great Poem. I enjoyed reading it :)

What I liked:
It is easy to feel the emotional struggle in this piece. It demonstrates both loss and acceptance of the fact that no matter how much we want to be with someone, sometimes it isn't meant to be. We can choose to let the experience hold us back or we can choose to learn and grow from it.

Helpful Technical Suggestions:
The only technical suggestion I have is for Line 12: I would replace "a new" (2 words) with "anew."

I enjoyed this poem and look forward to reading more of your work. Thanks for sharing this. :)

~~~Kimberly
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Review of Eons of Echoes  Open in new Window.
Review by LiveToWrite Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Love is one of the most powerful emotions. The images used in this poem reflect the intensity and the timelessness of real love. Love like this knows no boundaries. It is limitless and all-consuming. This poem showcases these qualities very nicely. As I read this piece, it called to mind thoughts of a wolf howling for it's mate, it's cries echoing across a moon-lit forest. It gave me goosebumps.
I felt it was well-written, powerful, and effective. We all have a desire for great love in our lives. You did a great job showing that love echoes across time. True love never dies. Well Done! I look forward to reading more of your work. Write On! :)
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